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How Can I Tell My Friends Not to Pay For Me at My Bachelorette?

Ask a Savvy Bride: Should the Bride Offer to Pay For Her Bachelorette?

As carefree and fun as they should be, wedding-related parties can produce some sticky finance conundrums. I received a question from SurferGurl that I figure most brides-to-be have wondered and asked our savvy bride contributor to share her take. You can submit your questions in our Ask Savvy group.

Dear Savvy,

Is there a tactful way for the bride to tell the Maid of Honor or friends she's happy to cover her own bachelorette costs?

To see what a savvy bride has to say about this, keep reading after the jump.

Savvy bride says:

While it's customary for the wedding party or attendees of the bachelorette to pay most of the bride's way, it's not a set rule. Bachelorette parties can be expensive and when you factor in paying for someone else beside yourself, things really start to add up. If the bride simply doesn't feel comfortable with her friends treating her to meals, drinks, and other activities, I think she should just be honest and tell them that she'd much prefer to pitch in and pay her way. If her friends oblige, I'm sure they'll want to treat her to at least one thing or another, in which case the bride should graciously say thank you and except their generosity. If her friends insist that she not pay (some people love to spoil their friends), the bride could always pull a fast one and slip her credit card for one of the meals or pay for the pool cabana one day as a big thank you.


Hope this helps, and if anyone has been in a similar situation before, please weigh in with your own advice.

Ask anything budget-, etiquette-, or planning-related — well, almost anything — by posting your questions in the Ask Savvy group, and I'll find the right expert to help you out.

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