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I Feel Pressured to Spend More on a Honeymoon Registry

Ask a Savvy Bride: Should I Spend More on a Honeymoon Registry?

This Ask a Savvy Bride is part of a Wedding Season series of advice from a savvy soon-to-be bride. If you have a conundrum that you need help with share it in the Ask Savvy group.

Dear Savvy,

I'm trying to buy a gift for a friend who is getting married next month. She and her fiancé are registered at Williams-Sonoma and, but they've made it clear that they'd prefer things for their honeymoon over things to fill their kitchen. Like many women my age, I have a ton of weddings this Summer so I'm trying to be penny wise, which leaves me in a weird predicament: Since registering for a honeymoon is like giving cash, I feel obligated to give more than I would if I were just buying a gift. What's an appropriate amount to spend?

Unclear Claire

To see the savvy bride's advice,


Savvy bride says:

I know it's easier said than done, but you should not feel any pressure to spend more money on their honeymoon registry than you would on a traditional gift registry. In both instances, the bride and groom know how much you've spent — after all, they were the ones that chose the items! Hopefully your friend has given her guests options in terms of price point so people can gift within their budget; say brunch by the pool versus a night's stay in their honeymoon suite.


Everyone's comfort zone and bank account is different so I can't really tell you how much to spend. Do what you feel comfortable with, keeping in mind what else you've spent on shower gifts, engagement party gifts, travel, bridesmaid dress, etc. I hope I was able to help!

Ask anything budget-, etiquette-, or planning-related — well, almost anything — by posting your questions in the Ask Savvy group, and I'll find the right expert to help you out. If you are planning a wedding, already happily wed, or still looking for Mr. Right, start sharing your big day with our community. Don’t forget to check the wedding content box on your post.

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Join The Conversation
myystque myystque 7 years
Ugh, this kind of thing is one of my pet peeves. I hate how gift giving is now expected in weddings, birthdays, and even other events, and how people often feel a sense of entitlement such that if they already have everything they need for their new life together, they feel as though they can ask for friends and relatives to foot the bill for honeymoons and trips. It's sad that gift-giving ends up being this huge pressure on people. If I ever get married, I wouldn't want my friends and relatives worrying about how much to spend on me or whether they have to get me a gift.
Spectra Spectra 7 years
They probably already have a lot of stuff for their kitchen, which is why they want money for their honeymoon instead. Just give them what you would have spent on a gift as money toward their honeymoon.
GirlieGossip GirlieGossip 7 years
I totally agree. Couples know exactly how much everyone spent regardless, but I can promise you that's not what matters. When I got married I was just thrilled to receive gifts that helped me start my new life with my husband. I didn't think about how much guests spent at all.
skigurl skigurl 7 years
i agree, you dont have to give more cash than you would spend on a gift from a registry, because they know precisely how much you spent given then chose the gift! therefore, i say give her what she wants: money towards the sounded from your post that you don't have to choose an "element" of the trip to pay for, as Savvy alluded to - because you said it's like "giving cash" - so i'd say choose a round number and go with it...give her $100 if it's you alone or $150 if it's you and a guest and just call it a day...if you do need to choose an element, choose one of the less expensive elements, like Savvy said, or two small ones, and again, move on don't fret over it - give what you feel comfortable giving also, my personal stance on stuff like this is, if $25 more would make me seem less cheap and make me more comfortable, then i'm willing to give that little bit more and save in another area - in the grand scheme of things, something like $25 isn't that much
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