Damon Wayans Jr. may come from one of the funniest families in show business, but with his roles on New Girl and Happy Endings (RIP [1]), he's been cracking us up hard all on his own. When Damon isn't making us LOL on screen, he brings his hilarious musings to Twitter [2]; on any given day, you can find Damon getting candid about dating, pop culture, and not being a morning person. Keep reading for 21 tweets from Damon that will have you laughing your ass off.

You know you're not a morning person when you think people are saying "good morning" to you just to piss you off.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 24, 2015 [3]

"I'm gonna put this wig on, I'm gonna go outside, and it's gonna work." - old lady wearing a wig that doesn't work

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 22, 2015 [4]

You ever be getting yelled at by your mom and think "NOW I see why dad left"?

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 30, 2015 [5]

Kids give zero fucks about who they pick their wedgies out in front of

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 28, 2015 [6]

If I had a dollar for every time someone gave me a dollar

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 21, 2015 [7]

This dude just proposed to his girl in chipotle. He for sure doesn't love her.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 14, 2015 [8]

What is it about being a mom that makes you tell the same damn stories over and over again?

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 11, 2015 [9]

"Nah, son." - Rosa Parks

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 25, 2015 [10]

So good, it should be called vaJOYna

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 12, 2015 [11]

How many times a day do girls say "Awwww." ?

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 10, 2015 [12]

I need to get married. Married guys get allll the bitches.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) January 3, 2015 [13]

Dear Beyonce, please poot in my soup.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) December 31, 2014 [14]

Been a while since I've read an actual magazine. I accidentally double tapped one of the pictures I liked in it.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) December 13, 2014 [15]

"@MrJakeJohnson [16]: Everyone go see my son from my first marriage @wayansjr [17] movie Big Hero 6 this weekend. #BigHero6 [18]" > you ain't my damn daddy

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) November 4, 2014 [19]

While ya'll sleep, I grind......my teeth while I'm sleeping as well. #ZaddyNeedsHisNaps [20]

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) October 15, 2014 [21]

Why are people who don't do shit ALWAYS getting massages?

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) August 23, 2014 [22]

"Oh my God, that's sooo me." - every woman's thoughts while watching 'Gone Girl'

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) October 4, 2014 [23]

Yo, bugs bunny was fine as hell in drag tho. pic.twitter.com/JKMTuVnwTa [24]

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) September 13, 2014 [25]

Just walked past this car with a dog in it, and the dog locked the door. #whiteMansBestFriend [26]

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) October 25, 2014 [27]

I've never done acid before, but I assume it's a lot like watching the new sponge bob movie. #IdLoveAcid [28]

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) February 8, 2015 [29]

Nothing makes a girl happier than when every girl in the group pic looks wack but her.

— Damon Wayans Yunior? (@wayansjr) October 21, 2014 [30]