• A rep for Keith Richards says the musician was joking when he said he snorted his dead father's ashes. Phew, but not such a great joke when everyone believes you. - AP
  • John Travolta was forced to leave his private jet in Ireland after he experienced technical difficulties on his flight to New York and had to make an emergency landing. High class problems are such a bitch. - TMZ
  • Scary Movie's Anna Faris filed for divorce from her husband of three years actor Benjamin Indra. It's probably not a great sign that we didn't even know she was married. - AP
  • CNN's Paula Zahn and her husband of 20 years have also filed for divorced amid rumors that she's having an affair. Doesn't anyone stay together anymore? - Page Six
  • Valerie Bertinelli says she's fat and is joining Kirstie Alley as the new face and body of Jenny Craig. Guess she'll just take it one day at a time. Ba dum bum! - People
  • Former Miss USA Shandi Finnessey and partner Brian Fortuna were kicked off Dancing with the Stars last night. Not a good year for Miss USAers. - People