You know when you're a kid on the playground, playing the name game with all your friends? Remember the giggles and the joviality? American Horror Story recalls that innocence for about three brief minutes this week. Of course, the remainder of the episode is filled with attempted exorcisms, labored births, and humans being burned alive. The uptick in madness might have to do with the countdown to the show's season finale — for those keeping score, there are only three episodes remaining in the season.
Truthfully, I'm getting a little restless. This episode has some great developments, but there is also a lot of empty threats and serious talks. There are so many stray story lines that I'll be surprised if they can tie all this up with a neat bow come the finale. Let's take a look at the most insane moments when you read more.
- Sister Mary Eunice takes Monsignor's virginity. Oh, double icky. Sister Mary Eunice attempts to seduce the Monsignor and proceeds to straddle him, despite his protestations. Eventually he gives in, just in time for Dr. Arden to peer around the corner and see his beloved betraying him. It must be then that he finally realizes Sister Mary Eunice is not quite herself and takes his frustration out on all the poor mutants living in the forest, baiting and shooting them methodically.
- Monsignor pushes Sister Mary Eunice over the balcony . . . to her death. Looks like Monsignor is taking hints from Revenge's Victoria Grayson, as he tosses the possessed Sister Mary Eunice over the rail like a sack of old potatoes. I was thinking there would be more carnage, but her body just crumples. She's dead on impact, but it looks like the demon may have just migrated out of her and into some other unsuspecting soul.
- Dr. Arden cremates himself. Alive, guys. He cremates himself alive. So overcome with Sister Mary Eunice's death and the guilt of his own medical failures is he that he crawls on top of Mary Eunice's dead body — it was at this point that I began silently praying they'd steer clear of necrophilia — and pushes the button, sliding both Mary Eunice and himself into the incinerator. It would be sad, but he's a sadistic ex-Nazi, so it's just gross.
- Sister Jude gets shock treatment. If anything gets me writhing in my armchair, it's shock treatment. Jude gets sent to the chair after Mary Eunice finds a cucumber in her cell — I'll let you speculate about that one — and turns the dial way past the recommended wattage. Jude's brain gets scrambled like a fluffy omelet and her motor skills are so bad she can barely knead dough.
- The entire asylum breaks out in dance. The shock treatment is horrific, but it does lead to one of the most entertaining moments of the season: Jude's dance-along to "The Name Game." It's all an illusion in her addled mind, but it is fun to see her done up all pretty and inspiring a Glee-style jam in the middle of the common room. Even Kit and Lana (Bana Mo Mana) get in on the action!
- Grace gives birth. In a shocking move, American Horror Story misses an opportunity for a graphic birthing scene as Pepper assists in the birth of Grace's baby. She claims it's Kit's, but might it also be half-alien?
What did you think of "The Name Game"?