Every Friday, I round up the week's best, funniest, strangest, and most embarrassing moments in television for your amusement.
- Masi Oka is officially my new favorite nerd. On "The Tonight Show with Jay Leno," the "Heroes" star revealed that he's actually a genius, delivered a gift-wrapped box to Justin Timberlake, and released a brand-new "Heroes" clip. Woo!
- Speaking of nerds, you've gotta see the performance by Landry's Christian speed-metal band Crucifictorious from this week's "Friday Night Lights" — it's hysterical, just like every band you ever saw in high school. Go to the full episode and click on the link for Part Six.
- Mick Jagger's loft, as presented in the premiere of "The Knights of Prosperity," contains the following items: a popcorn dispenser shaped like the Rolling Stones mouth, with a butter spout hidden behind the tongue; a climate-controlled hat room; and an indoor swimming pool for his dogs. "This is a great swimming pool, or so I'm told," he says, before pitching a ball in the water for his collie.
For the rest of the highlights and lowlights,
- From the premiere episode of "Dirt":
Brent: "Is that how you get through the night, pretending to be a journalist?"
Lucy: "No. I take pills."
- On "30 Rock," newly engaged Cerie tells Liz she's ready to have kids: "I already have all the names picked out. If it's a girl, Bookcase. Or Sandstorm. Or maybe Hat, but that's more of a boy's name."
- On "The Real World: Denver," Brooke's worried she doesn't have what it takes to be an Outward Bound instructor. Is it the rock climbing she fears? The camping? Nope. While peering into her powder compact, she whines: "I'm not going to be able to look at myself for five days, except through this tiny little mirror."
- In last night's "House" parody episode of "Scrubs," Dr. Cox proclaims,
"If you want to solve a real mystery, how about why anybody on the planet thinks Dane Cook is funny?"
- On Thursday's "Late Show with David Letterman," Dave's desk banter is suddenly interrupted by a voiceover from Paul Shaffer:
Paul: "You learn a lot of weird things working with Dave for 25 years. For example, it might seem like I'm far away from him, but I can smell the booze on his breath from over here. It's pretty sad ..."
Dave: "Paul, what are you doing?"
Paul: "I'm recording my commentary track for the 'Late Show' DVD."
Dave: "Could you do that later, please?"
- On the "Back from Vacation" episode of "The Office," the camera crew catches Kevin folding up a poster-size print of the picture with Michael Scott and a mostly naked Jan on the beach. "What am I going to do with it? I'm going to hang it up at home," he says. "I don't have a lot of art."