All Grey's Anatomy [1] fans know that at the heart of queen Shonda Rhimes's popular medical drama are Meredith's poignant voiceovers, and the tearjerker songs. Grey's is an emotional commitment, but loyal fans wouldn't have it any other way. Season 13 is a particularly heavy season, with arcs like the Alex-Andrew debacle, Meredith and Nathan's burgeoning tension, and most recently, the precarious state of Richard's teaching position. Before the show resumes mid-January, here are some sad songs up to the midseason finale that will take you back to season 13's most heart-wrenching moments. Get some tissues out!
"All I Do" by Yuna
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 1
-
Why it destroyed you: Season 13's premiere is no easy one. Yuna's delicate, soulful song plays as Meredith contemplates telling Bailey that Alex assaulted Andrew. It hurts to watch Meredith ask Nathan to sit with her for a while, since her loyalty to Maggie prevents her from taking things with him any further. At the song's climax, Meredith reluctantly tells Bailey the truth, knowing that she will jeopardize Alex's career despite doing the right thing.
"Bring it Back to Me" by Martin Luke Brown
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 1
-
Why it destroyed you: Brown's downtrodden song is a prayer in this soul-crushing moment. Grey's fans know that Alex Karev starts as a former bully and frat boy. But over the course of 13 seasons, he's turned into a compassionate, capable pediatric surgeon who's had his heart broken a few times. Witnessing Alex get cuffed up and be judged by his colleagues is a bitter pill to swallow.
"Hallelujah" by Alicia Keys
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 1
- Why it destroyed you: No, it's not the Leonard Cohen song, but Alicia Key's gritty, raspy anthem perfectly sums up the heartbreaking season 13 premiere. It softly plays in the background as Meredith coolly rejects Nathan's advances and as Alex talks to Meredith behind bars.
"Heart in My Hands" by Andreya Triana
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 3
- Why it destroyed you: Triana's warm, stripped-down song tells the story of a broken spirit, which we see in Kara, the pregnant patient who crashes her car into her father's funeral, and in Andrew, who notices everyone acting coldly towards him. Arizona kindly reassures Kara that her mother will forgive her and promises Andrew that she won't evict him even though she cares about Alex. In a typical Grey's twist, Kara's mother flatlines.
"Diamond" by Bandit Heart
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 3
- Why it destroyed you: This soothing, piano-heavy song kicks off during an uplifting moment, when Kara's baby survives delivery and Arizona learns that Kara's mother isn't dead after all. But then the baby's blood pressure starts dropping. The song intercuts a scene where Nathan and Meredith tenderly discuss how they sometimes dream about their lost loved ones. Play-It-Cool Nathan, while no McDreamy, suddenly transforms into Meredith's dark and twisty equal, and it's hard to contain our feels about them.
"West" by Sleeping At Last
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 4
- Why it destroyed you: Meredith, again, rejects Nathan, reasoning that she doesn't want to question his or her medical decisions because of their fling. As Ryan O'Neal sings the first few lines of this weepy Sleeping at Last original, Meredith enigmatically tells Nathan that she doesn't want to be thinking about him. We then see a beaming Alex share with Meredith how happy he is to uncover a one-in-a-million case, despite the fact that he might go to jail.
"The Story Never Ends" by Lauv
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 5
- Why it destroyed you: Sometimes, a sad song that accompanies a mundane scene on Grey's Anatomy [3] is a foreshadowing device. This warbly Lauv song does just that. Maggie's patient Andy asks Stephanie to tell him a joke, saying that he would prefer to go out laughing if he doesn't make it through his operation. Stephanie forgets her joke, and Andy is taken out by anesthesia. At the same time, Owen's snoozing with Jackson's baby, and we know that he looks a little too content.
"My Mind is an Endless Sea" by The Wind + The Wave
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 5
- Why it destroyed you: Maggie consoles Stephanie, whose patient Andy dies on the OR table, as this quiet, folksy song strums in the background. After Andy's death, Meredith now has a matched liver for her patient Chelsea.
"It Ain't Easy" by Muddy Magnolias
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 7
- Why it destroyed you: This gravelly blues song sums up the gut punch we feel as Grey Sloan drama heightens. April casually grabs Jackson's nachos as she chats about her Tinder date. While he encourages her to go, Jackson despondently sighs when she leaves, indicating his remaining feelings for her. Meanwhile, Amelia reveals to Meredith that Owen didn't take her confession so well, and Merrick promises to fix Grey Sloan's teaching program on one condition: she won't work with Richard Webber.
"Something's Missing" by Kris Orlowski, feat. Aron Wright
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 5
- Why it destroyed you: Amelia overhears how joyously a patient tells her husband that she's pregnant. Feeling nervous, she sets up a romantic ambiance before taking a pregnancy test with Owen. Owen excitedly chatters about turning the study into a nursery. They find out that she's not pregnant, and Amelia lets out a sigh of relief while Owen's face is flush with disappointment. As Wright sings, "I won't live my life like something's missing," Grey's fans, while heartbroken, can detect that some tragic part of this story is missing.
"All Your Glory" by Broods
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 9
- Why it destroyed you: As Broods' quiet hymn fills the background, the doctors concoct an experimental, Hail-Mary effort to save their patient Karl. Per Dr. Webber's original request, they personalize Karl by thinking of people from their own lives. For Stephanie, it's her younger self, for Meredith, it's her children, and for Owen, it's his sister. It's a sentimental moment that reminds Grey's fans of their beloved characters' backstories and motivations.
"Somewhere Only We Know" by Lily Allen
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 9
- Why it destroyed you: Watching patients die on this show is never easy, and it's harder when the patient is a child. This guileless, laid-back version of Keane's upbeat tune will tear you apart when you watch the doctors at Grey Sloan try in vain to save Winnie, the young victim of a building collapse. The song fades as the doctors give up on resuscitating her. Just as we're freshly primed by this tragedy, Jo tells Alex that she's married.
"You Wouldn't Like Me" by Sleeping At Last
- When it destroyed you: Season 13, episode 9
- Why it destroyed you: When a song is a Sleeping At Last cover on Grey's Anatomy [4], you know it's bound to be sad, even if it's as originally upbeat as Tegan and Sara's "You Wouldn't Like Me." Alex goes to the DA's office, likely to plead guilty as he listens to Meredith's voicemail, in which she tells him not to do anything rash. In the same cadence of sadness, Owen reads Amelia's goodbye letter. In a glimmering moment of hope, Richard gathers doctors to support him as his position is being ousted by Dr. Merrick. While this happens, fans are sitting at the edge of their seats, not knowing what will happen next.