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In Defense of Spanking

In Defense of Spanking

Spanking is one of the most contentious and hotly debated issues in the world of parenting. When we last visited the issue here on the RoundUp, it was to feature the anti-spanking viewpoint (Why Spanking Is Wrong). We return to the debate this time with the other point of view. Here, moms who spank share the reasons they consider it an invaluable discipline tool.

1. Spanking is NOT the Same as Beating

"There is a difference between spanking and beating. I think that's the main thing that people fail to understand. If it's a true spanking, then there's nothing wrong with it... If the line is ever crossed and it becomes a beating, then immediate action must be taken. Statistically though, spankers don't turn into beaters.....beaters are abusive no matter what. I've seen people rip a child's arm off to throw the child in a corner. That's far worse than a parent that issues a controlled spanking." -Elaine of Commotion from the Ocean of Life

"One whack on the bootie and a discussion of why it was done can be very effective. Used in such a way it is not abuse or scarring them for life. There is a clear distinction between spanking and hitting your child. Disciplining them shows we are truly concerned for them and love them and should be used as such." -TerriAnn von Gosliga of Cookies and Clogs


2. Some Children Need It

"Every child is different, so an effective way of disciplining one might not be as effective on another. I see that very clearly with my two boys. And sometimes, the effectiveness of the discipline seems to depend on the day." -Elaine of Commotion from the Ocean of Life


"For our kids, I am starting with explaining what they did wrong, time outs and loss of privileges, but if one of my children doesn't respond to these [and] does to spanking, I'd be willing to explore that option, as long as it was done in a loving way." -Teresa Johnson of Away We Go

"Every child is different and this is sometimes all that's effective for certain children. They don't turn out to be abusers or anything else, it's just what works for them. [With] other children, there's never a need to spank, and [so] they shouldn't be [spanked]." -Elaine of Commotion from the Ocean of Life

3. It's Not Done Out of Anger or in Public 

"Spanking, or correcting, should be done in private, not out in the open, because that often brings shame or embarrassment on the child.  In private they can be reminded of why they are being spanked and they can also be reminded they are loved and how they could have done things differently.  The key is to also remain calm and then carry on. Not dwelling on the wrong behavior." -Jacqueline Mukeweto of Chez Mukweto

"My husband was spanked, but he remembers his father doing it in proper way and and always knew that his father loved him and would talk about the reason for the discipline." -Teresa Johnson of Away We Go

"I have never thought spanking was unacceptable when administered properly. For some children, this is an important tool in their upbringing but it should never be done in anger." -TerriAnn von Gosliga of Cookies and Clogs

A Final Word

"No matter what, a parent has the right to make that choice and do what's right for their family without others interfering with that decision. ... The circumstances must be decided by each parent and it must be handled in a correct manner. Nobody has the right to say what's right for another person or family." -Elaine of Commotion from the Ocean of Life

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