The two main components of a wedding are the ceremony and the reception. During both of these, it's not ideal to have a newborn baby with you. This is especially true if you're not just attending the wedding but are also IN the wedding. The ceremony is a time for watching and listening, quiet reflection, and observing the couple exchange their vows [1]. The reception is a time for celebrating, eating, mingling, dancing, and drinking. It doesn't sound like a baby really meshes well with any of these things, right? Well, I learned the hard way that a newborn baby [2] definitely doesn't when I was stuck bringing my newborn to my best friend's wedding.
Even with the help of my mom and my husband, I barely had a moment to enjoy it.
But let me start from the beginning. My best friend got engaged when I was two months pregnant, and I was thrilled to be asked to be her maid of honor. It was a very exciting time, but I did worry about being pregnant during all the planning, bachelorette party [4], shower, and ultimately the wedding, which just so happened to be fewer than three weeks after I was due. This began giving me anxiety pretty early on, but I was still wrapped up in the excitement of my best friend's dreams coming true. When it came time for the wedding, my son was less than a month old. Thank God I had an easy delivery and recovery [5], or else we may not have made it at all. But we made the multistate road trip [6] to the East Coast and prepped for a day and night out . . . with a newborn baby.
I nursed him [7] moments before walking down the aisle and handed him to my husband, at which point he began to wail uncontrollably. This forced my husband to pace back and forth, shushing and jiggling him while missing the entire ceremony. I watched my best friend get married, then I walked back up the aisle, searched for my husband and son, had a short period of time to calm the baby, and nursed him some more. To be honest, the rest of the reception was a blur. Even with the help of my mom and my husband, I barely had a moment to enjoy it. I didn't have time to really eat anything, I missed the photo booth [8] entirely, and I was on the dance floor for maybe one full song with all my friends. My friend and her new husband were more than accommodating by allowing me to bring my son, especially since this was a no-kids wedding.
While I was truly so excited for my friend, I had a hard time balancing everything. My son was brand new on this earth and needed me for things no one else could give him. Because of this, I was unable to fully enjoy this amazing time in my friend's life. I was unable to let loose, turn my mom mentality [10] off, and catch up with friends I only get to see at weddings now that we're all busy living our own lives. So you won't catch me bringing my baby to another wedding again. While I think we all should do what we need to do to provide for our kids, I've learned that I'd rather have the opportunity to enjoy the wedding I'm attending — then go home and enjoy my kids after.