Before I became a parent, I didn't quite understand the daily juggling act [1] that is required to survive. Having kids means being responsible for little people who can't seem to remember the most basic things, like brushing their teeth [2] two times a day or wearing socks. They don't know how to tell time, manage a calendar or understand what the word Tuesday means, so keeping a schedule is tough. Pre-planning the day and closing down the day are the two practices that have been game-changers in my attempt to keep our parenting journey as organized as possible.
I was always a type-A worker [3]. I color-coded categories in my work calendar and set alerts regularly so I would never forget a task. Turning in my pencil skirts for yoga pants when I became a stay-at-home mom [4] was a transition I thought would result in less stress. I thought I would just go with the flow, snuggle with my daughter, and not have much to worry about. Then reality set in, and I realized that my laid-back attitude wasn't going to cut it if we wanted to survive.
To my surprise, parenting requires more organization [5] than managing a stressful full-time job. At least with a job I could count on a boss that will hound me if a task was urgent, and co-workers I could enlist for help. Honestly, friends who work at an office and raise a child, how is this even working? Organization skills are non-negotiable.
I realized quickly that in order to keep on top of things, I needed to come up with a system [7]. Thankfully, I already knew what worked for me pre-parenthood and once I realized that, when all was said and done, there wasn't much difference between being a mom and being on the workforce full-time, it was a lot easier to set a plan in motion. In parenting, there are still tasks to be performed, due dates to be met, and lots of accountability. With so many similarities, I changed my mindset and took some habits I created at work and transitioned them into my mom-life.
I start my day at my parent-job the same way I started my day at my pre-parenthood job: At a desk with my calendar and planner in hand.
Now, I start my day at my parent-job the same way I started my day at my pre-parenthood job: at a desk with my calendar and planner in hand. I go through the day's schedule and strategize how and when I am going to get everything done. I run through obligations and make a very loose plan in my head. I then run through relevant things with my husband, so he and I are on the same page. This practice takes me all of five minutes, and it saves me a lot of grief in the long run. Sacrificing five minutes of scrolling through social media before my child is up to mentally prepare for my day [8] is worth it. The day might, of course, not go according to plan, but I don't sweat it and make a mental note of what needs to happen the next day.
At the end of the workday, I recap the day and pre-plan for the next day once my kiddo goes to sleep. The evening prep usually takes me around 30 minutes, but with a glass of wine nearby and silence, it's not that bad to run through what is on tap for the next day. I also get the house in order [9] (as much as possible) so I can focus on unexpected things that come up in the morning — like my daughter dealing with the very time-consuming and giant tragedy that is having a bad hair day. I force my husband off of the couch and we both prep the house like rockstars: unload the dishwasher, fold towels, put things away, get the coffee ready to brew in the morning. It is the last thing both of us want to do after a long day, but we are so thankful that we put in the effort come morning time.
Treating parenthood like a job doesn't give a warm and fuzzy feeling, but it does result in a sense of organization [10], calmness, and structure. It provides a routine that has guaranteed us a flow that has saved us a lot of time and grief in the long run.