What It's Like to Be Married to Someone With Anxiety

When our house is messy, cluttered, or dirty, it can really set his anxiety symptoms spinning. My husband says that when the house is neat and clean, it makes his mind feel more clear and relaxed.

Dr. Vigliotti explained that a home that feels out of order can make a person with anxiety feel uneasy and out of control, which can trigger symptoms. Sometimes the person may be anxious about something else, such as a work conflict, and coming home to an untidy space will make things a million times worse. When it comes to our house, this is what helps:

Anxiety doesn't always manifest in the way I thought it would. He rarely has an all-out panic attack, and sometimes he's just having negative emotions, like acting frustrated, annoyed, sad, or distant. I try to offer emotional support whenever I can:

Crowds like fairs or school functions and even small social settings like parties can trigger symptoms of anxiety. Sometimes I go alone, which means it's just me and the kids. Sometimes we go together but only stay for a short time. Here's what I do in social situations to ease his anxiety:

Since order and schedules are his BFFs, nothing throws a wrench in the system like traveling, because plans can quickly change. Here's how we go away and still stay calm and worry-free:

Sometimes my husband gets anxious about something that's happened, such as an issue at work, worrying about a sick relative, or the loss of someone close. But sometimes, as Dr. Vigliotti explained, it can be cognitive, where someone imagines dangers based on their experiences.

"Anxiety is generally an experience of 'time traveling' into the future and making negative predictions," she said. This is the perfect explanation. My husband often thinks about the future and imagines issues I never would think of.

For example, yesterday, he started talking to me about how next year we'll have to take our son to hockey practice four times a week. My first response was, "Chill out! Let's deal with that next year," but I remember that my trying to shut down his worries can often escalate them. Here's how I handle these situations:

When my husband is happy and takes care of himself, things are all-around better. Here's how I make sure that happens:

Through writing about health and fitness, I've been able to get samples of CBD products. Since they're supposed to help with anxiety, I thought I'd let my husband try a few, and they have been life-changing. Through trial and error, he's found that taking 35 mg of CBD oil first thing in the morning before his cup of coffee prevents symptoms he'd otherwise feel if he didn't take it. It doesn't make him feel much, except what he says is "the absence of anxiety and general irritability." Here's how we use CBD as a preventative measure:

Of course, I wouldn't be able to help care for my husband's needs if I didn't address mine first, which he helps make possible. This is how I practice self-care: