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Do You RSVP?

My birthday party is this Saturday night and so far, I've received only one RSVP! I sent over 40 homemade, snail-mail invitations and find it hard to believe that almost no one has called to tell me if they are or are not coming.

Am I too old-fashioned? Is RSVP-ing a thing of the distant past?


Join The Conversation
adamo adamo 8 years
this is happening now to me. i invited my sons class over for a halloween party this saturday and only one person rsvp. i put my phone and email.a part of me hopes everyone comes but because of this i had to buy enough food and all just in case they do all show up.
milosmommy milosmommy 8 years
Omg. This is my new biggest pet peeve. It just happened with my son's birthday party that I've been planning for this weekend. I sent the snail mail invites out like 3wks in advance. I invited like 50 people and I got like 3 calls. I called everyone else myself because hey I need to know how much food to have. Parties are expensive and I don't want to just assume everyones coming and be stuck with a ton of food to go bad. Same thing happened to my mom last year when she planned my baby shower. So annoying. It's really not hard nor does it take a lot of time to pick up the phone and say "hey I'll be there/won't be there" end of story. Ugh.
CoralAmber CoralAmber 8 years
I usually am one of the RSVPers who does it late, usually because I'm not sure of my work schedule, but the last thing I had to RSVP for was my high school reunion. If any of my friends have parties fancier than E-vites they don't invite me... hmmm... I'm sure that says something bad about me.
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 8 years
Always. It's rude not to.
corcar86 corcar86 8 years
I am definitely (unintentionally) rude when it comes to R.S.V.Ping to things :/ I try not to forget but a lot of times I do. It helps if it's someone I see in which case I almost never forget (I thank them for the invite and confirm I am coming in person) or if I get the invite via email then I make a point to send a reply then and there but if requires making a call to someone I won't see for a while I admit I forget at least 50% of the time :( ooh im bad lol but I would definitely consider this rude behavior on my part and it shouldn't be expected by the host or hostess and I can definitely see the necessity for the practice...maybe part of the problem is a lot of us tend to over schedule ourselves and just plain forget we have failed to call
jessie jessie 8 years
i finally gave up on the RSVP thingy.....if i invited 20...i plan to feed 20...if i have leftovers...well..more for me :)
ilanac13 ilanac13 8 years
for me - i think that it depends on the situation. sometimes there are people who put RSVP when it's necessary to do so, and of course i would RSVP cause i think that it's rude to leave a host hanging, but there have been instancs when the invitation has had it as a request, but it wasn't necessary and in those cases, i don't really bother.
vmruby vmruby 8 years
Always......I make it a point to never forget, whether I'm going or not. But what really pisses me off is when people don't have enough class to RSVP and then decide to show up anyway expecting you to roll out the red carpet for them.I always amazed at their huge balls and I wonder just what the hell could they possibly be thinking? :oy:
Punk-Glam-Queen Punk-Glam-Queen 8 years
wickedcupofjoe: "This aggravates me to no end. I've had 4 school birthday parties for my kiddo and every time only 4-5 of the 11-12 kids RSVP. I don't understand -- how hard is it to just call? You can even leave a message! We've even had cases where they've RSVPd and then they didn't show." Yep had the same thing with kid parties. The worst are ones where you are doing them elsewhere and need a head count. Also had the opposite, at a Build-A-Bear party where they showed when they said they weren't. Nice. I wish people would get it...
kittyhill kittyhill 8 years
I had this exact thing happen for a baby shower I was hosting! I had to call THEM to get their responses! What a waste of time!
skigurl skigurl 8 years
i would def RSVP for a snail-mail invitation, but i almost never get those anymore, except for weddings. if it's like a facebook invitation, you can bite me!
Jabbadoo Jabbadoo 8 years
Of course I RSVP. The people who don't RSVP are the people who have never planned an event that involves anything more than "Hey dude, I'm going to be hanging out on my patio, stop by with a 6pack if you feel like it.." I especially don't understand people who don't RSVP for weddings.. or worse, who show up with an extra, univited guest. All these people never think not RSVPing is no big deal because the host doesn't make a big deal out of (which is the epitome of graciousness) But do not doubt, it is rude. I have two rules: 3 years of Christmas cards with no reciprocity, and you get taken off the list. 3 invites that result in a no-show, or a non-rsvp and you won't be invited anymore. It's amazing that I hear from some people, "Wow I sure miss those pool parties, how come you stopped throwing them??" to which I always respond, "Oh we still have them! I'd invited you to several and never heard back, so I assumed you weren't interested."
Zulkey Zulkey 8 years
you know who are really good RSVP'ers? Married women (or engaged women) because you suddenly realize how f'ing rude it is of people not to reply when they should.
LaLaLaurie06 LaLaLaurie06 8 years
uhm YES!
SillyGirl SillyGirl 8 years
If a physical invitation says RSVP I always do. If a person I barely know includes me on a facebook evite with hundreds of others, I usually dont respond unless I am coming regardless of their RSVP request. Now-a-days I think its really important for hostesses though to match invitations and RSVP requests to the style of event. Housewarming party with beer and food from costco should probably be done with an evite-like invite. You got caterers? A physical invitation is appropriate. And there is nothing wrong (although frustrating) for the hostess to pick up the phone and say hey are you coming to my party this weekend.
ginafly ginafly 8 years
I share your pain! I also always send snail mail invites and ask people to R.s.v.p. At this point, I've got most of my friends (we are talking lots of clueless single guys--I'm an engineer) trained to reply to the invite. But I still usually do have to send a nag email a few days before the event to the stragglers. Miss Manners says you are totally within your rights to ask people for a response when they have not been forthcoming with it.
lisabarn lisabarn 8 years
Party sugar - what did you send out - can we see? I bet it was super cute!
lawchick lawchick 8 years
I have forgotten once, and I felt so bad! Most people rsvp'd to my wedding (with postage-paid cards), but I was super pissed about the ones who didn't -- how hard is it to check yes or no and put it in the mailbox?? I love when people put options for RSVP - like email and phone - because sometimes I feel awkward calling the host who I don't know (though I still do it).
partysugar partysugar 8 years
Actually ladies, I sent a different invitation...I ended up thinking that one looked to sympathy card-ish.
Leilanic1 Leilanic1 8 years
I always do! I find it incredibly rude when people don't! how are you supposed to plan or have enough food? that's what the rsvp is for! i don't buy that people are too busy, i think its laziness. common courtesies seem to be going out the window and it drives me nutso.
wickedcupofjoe wickedcupofjoe 8 years
This aggravates me to no end. I've had 4 school birthday parties for my kiddo and every time only 4-5 of the 11-12 kids RSVP. I don't understand -- how hard is it to just call? You can even leave a message! We've even had cases where they've RSVPd and then they didn't show. :(
TidalWave23 TidalWave23 8 years
If its a requirement - then yes, definitely. As an event coordinator I find it incredibly rude when people don't r.s.v.p.
lily_xx lily_xx 8 years
This is a pet peeve of mine. How hard is it to pick up the phone or shoot off an email to RSVP? It's so rude to the host/hostess not to respond to an invitation.
psterling psterling 8 years
I hate when people don't RSVP. One think you can consider though, is sending out and evite a few days after everyone has received their paper invitation. That way, they get email reminders and they can RSVP online, which a lot of people are more likely to do.
jenniiag jenniiag 8 years
This drives me nuts! A friend of my mother's just threw me a baby shower and half the people didn't RSVP - and these were ladies who know better! When I found out (the day before the shower) that my sisters-in-law hadn't RSVPed, they both received mini-lectures. It's just so rude and isn't that hard to send a quick e-mail or pick up the phone for 30 seconds. I do hope manners aren't going the way of the rotary phone...
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