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Can My Friend With Benefits Become a Relationship?

"Can My Friend With Benefits Become a Relationship?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

My friend with benefits and I recently decided that we are going to try to have a relationship. We have been friends with benefits for the past five years and just friends prior to that for two. We decided it was time to try dating because we both haven't wanted to be with other people, but we really don't want to ruin the passion we have together. We don't date other people, we don't even have sex with other people, it's just us.

Even though the title seems to be a formality at this point, I'm scared. I haven't had a boyfriend in over five years and he hasn't had a girlfriend in eight. We both talked about this and feel it's the right decision since we both care about each other, and we enjoy each other for more than just sex. Sorry if this sounds stupid, but how can I be a good girlfriend?

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

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dashsuede dashsuede 5 years
Communication. Any doubts... air it out.
lcrox07 lcrox07 5 years
Yep, relationship. I suggest you be the same way you are now to not make it awkward. Just don't flirt with other people and maybe talk to him more often? You'll find out gradually.
kurniakasih kurniakasih 5 years
Well, do things you guys haven't done, introduce him to your friends, perhaps? Go out on dates, the usual couple stuff, hanging out, relaxing, talking to each other, have fun happy time with each other. Good luck.
henna-red henna-red 5 years
Yes, I agree with missmary, you are in a relationship, it's just kind of a matter of grocery shopping together, and hangin' out watching the tube, getting to the point of that day you feel comfortable not showering around each other, just, filling in. A step at a time....... Good luck, and relax, you've got this. Have fun
Pazuzu Pazuzu 5 years
* you're doing. Sorry I don't like typos.
Pazuzu Pazuzu 5 years
I agree, I think you're already in a relationship. Whatever floats your boat, not everyone has to have the same relationship and rules. If you enjoy eachothers company and the sex then keep doing what your doing.
missmaryb missmaryb 5 years
So you've been sleeping together exclusively for 5 years? Sounds like you're already in a relationship? Or do you have no contact outside the sex? Just get in touch to set up a sex date? I wouldn't let the term "relationship" daunt you or think you have to change because you've given your situation a new label. Just be yourself, let him be himself, continue to enjoy some freedom and let him do the same, communicate and be honest, enjoy each other's company...and keep up that great sex you've been having the last 5 years. Good luck!
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