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Considering Having Lesbian Sex

"I'm Thinking of Having an Affair With Another Woman"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our community. Add your advice in the comments!

I am a woman and I am so curious about the opposite sex. I never really wanted to have a threesome or have sex with a woman. But since I have bad luck with men, maybe I should? But some people are saying it's bad, and I should not try it. I need help because I am starting to like women.

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postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 6 years
Listen, a relationship is a relationship. Regardless of the sex/gender of those involved in a relationship, they still have their ups and downs. If the reason you want to try your hand at women is simply because you're fed up with men, you may be in for a big surprise when you discover that the relationship will still have similar issues to deal with. If you're honestly interested in experimenting, that's a different thing. Make sure you're up front and honest with any women you decide to experiment with.
dikke-kus dikke-kus 6 years
Having bad luck with men is a poor excuse to play around with women. If a man won't have you then why would a woman? As if women are less deserving? If you feel like you have a better reason then let us all know.
PontNeuf PontNeuf 6 years
Sorry, "some people are saying it's bad" ? Bad as in morally wrong or bad as in bad in bed ? Are these people in any way reliable sources of advice in women-women relationships ? For the record, I agree with biwife. If you're attracted to women, that's cool. If not, don't bother. There's nothing worse than taking someone home if you're not actually attracted to them.
lezlo lezlo 6 years
Hi, I think your friends and family might be having negative reactions to you possibly making drastic changes in your life and by raising their concerns they show they care. I don't think that experimenting with women will cause you any kind of serious emotional trauma. I think that if you are curious and you are starting to like women you should be patient and see if that goes anywhere. I wouldn't worry about it, dwell on it, etc. You'll figure it out soon enough. As for what happens if you do experiment with women, I don't think you need to disclose right off the bat that you don't know where you stand as you straddle the line between gay and straight. Obviously don't be a tease to lesbian women who are seriously searching for love and expect lesbian lovers. That puts you in an uncomfortable position full of expectations that might put extra pressure on you that you don't need as you try to figure yourself out. So only tell people you trust about this. Don't let this get to you. See where it goes. And take it easy. If women work for you then you'll know soon enough. Good luck with love.
Aquadave Aquadave 6 years
You sound very straight, but if you want to experiment it might be fun, it might haunt you. Keep in mind a 3way while in a relationship 9out of10x will backfire. Hang in there you'll find a good guy
missmaryb missmaryb 6 years
If it's something you want to explore, you should. But don't mess with people's emotions just to have some fun. If you're in experimental mode, be up front with any woman you meet and be very clear about your intentions. And I would advise against trying it out just because you have no luck with men. Neither do most of us lol, but we don't switch over just for the heck of it.
searching-soul searching-soul 6 years
Personally I've never had a girl crush. I did have a good friend who thought she was bi and discovered she was gay. If you are attracted to women, experiment. You never know where your happiness lies. It's not like your entering a contract that says you have to be bi/gay or straight, for that matter.You get to choose what you want to do This is your life. I'm assuming your an adult, you pay your own rent and take care of yourself. Don't worry about what others think, it's irrelevant unless it's close family and friends. Even still, the choice is yours. You're not locked into anything and can always back down if you find it's not for you. Good luck.
BiWife BiWife 6 years
Being bi/gay isn't about being bored with the opposite sex, nor is it something to try & fake for fun. If you're attracted to women, sleep with em, if you're not, don't. I *hate* girls that wanna play gay, they're the worst teases.
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