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DEARSUGAR and Anxious Anna need your help. What's your take on Vegas weddings? Also, do you have any helpful advice for brides who have wedding phobias?

Dear Sugar,
I love my fiance very much but I am petrified of having a "wedding day." All the planning pressure, mixed with the grandness of build up has me scared still. I want to go ahead with my wedding, but I'd like it to be as quick and painless as possible. We've been dating for two years and engaged for about six months. I think it's time to get on with the show.

I've just booked two tickets to Vegas for next month. I've got a suite reserved for three nights and I am looking into an eight day honeymoon in California for the following day after the wedding. The only thing I am scared of now is regret. Everyone tells me that I'll wish I had more people there and made a bigger deal of the whole thing. What do you guys think? Anxious Anna

Join The Conversation
nycgirl nycgirl 10 years
What does he want? I would have been happy with an elopement or a very VERY small 'ceremony' that requires little planning, but he wanted something bigger, with his friends. It took me a while to come around, but I realized that this is a memory that will last forever, I can't be so selfish as to deprive him of a nice wedding if he wants one. We compromised on a 50 person wedding, and he's promised to do his part (and he has, wedding dress shopping with me and all). Before you go booking tickets and making decisions for the both of you, might want to check out what your other half wants ;)
Mojave Mojave 10 years
I had a wonderful Vegas wedding almost 13 years ago. It was just the two of us and it was perfection. We went to a local dress shop and I got a gorgeous full length wedding dress which they altered for me in under 6 hrs. Someone above mentioned professional photos. A good Vegas wedding chapel will have a professional on hand. Our photos turned out gorgeous and they had them back to us in I believe 2 days. There was even a piano player there who played our song for us. I sang our obscure song, one the piano player said he had never heard before, twice, just minutes before the ceremony and he improvised his way through it very nicely. Even my favorite flower, daisies, magically showed up in a lovely bouquet despite the fact that there were only roses and carnations in the chapel display case. Probably my favorite part though was before and after. As we walked out of the casino/hotel we were staying at and into the casino where the chapel was - in full wedding regalia - we were absolutely mobbed by well-wishers each time. It felt like being a movie star. Everyone wanted to talk to us and offer their congratulations. It was so cool. The only caveat I must add is that flying by the seat of our pants like we did and getting everything done in one day, we easily paid twice or four times the price for everything. Compared to the price of a regular wedding though, it was nothing. I hope this encourages you. Of course the best part of all and the most important part is that 13 years later I still have the best husband on the planet. :)
M155-J4CK13 M155-J4CK13 10 years
It's your wedding, and you should do what you want. Is your fiance okay with the low-key wedding? If so, be happy and do what makes you feel most comfortable. In the future you could always renew your vows and make it a big event.
Regular_Lady Regular_Lady 10 years
Don't worry about regretting anything - just savor the freedom you've created for yourself by making your own plans and sticking to them. Don't confuse other people's *ideal* weddings with what is right for you. If in years to come, you feel you've missed out, have a vow renewal ceremony and do it up as you wish. My husband and I were married at the courthouse, printed the invites ourselves and just invited family and a few friends. At the time, it was the right thing for us to do - and today, 20 years later, I have ab-sol-u-tely no regrets. We're every bit as married as people who put on SuperPosh weddings.
lickety-split lickety-split 10 years
we had a big wedding and it was fun but i could have done it your way and been fine. the way so many people tried to say how we should do things was really odd, even more so in retrospect. probably easier and less stressful to just send the invitations after all the decisions have been made or the announcements after the ceremony. try and remember it's not the wedding that matters so much as the marriage. your whole life you have heard that "this is your day" but of course everything could go wrong on "the big day" and your married life could be fabulous. it's a special day because you join your lives and it marks a beginning. but that's it; it's just the beginning. and one more (small) thing, it still frosts me that my wedding cake cost $700. nearly 10 years and i'm still not glad "everyone got to have their favorite".
SweetPeasMom SweetPeasMom 10 years
We got married in a minister's living room with all of like 6 people in attendance. I WISH I had done a bigger wedding, not huge, but at least had the dress and pictures and more family there.
JennaV JennaV 10 years
Night Jamers :)
atoxicsparkle atoxicsparkle 10 years
sweet dreams hon!
jennifer76 jennifer76 10 years
Night Jamers!!
My-Opinion My-Opinion 10 years
My-Opinion My-Opinion 10 years
oh please, this is so stupid!!! If you have this much concern about a "wedding".......then you shouldn't do it...........gawd, you can't be that ignorant!!!!!
Imabeliever Imabeliever 10 years
We thought about eloping or having a destination wedding, but then had about a 100 people at a Spanish Villa restaurant. We had the wedding in a beautiful room that had a fireplace and a stair way that I walked down in front of everyone(Glup) and then everyone went to a beautiful courtyard with bougainvillea and fountains and old trees for champagne and appetisers while they changed the room from wedding site to tables and dancing.. our cake was in a gazebo in the courtyard. We had the wedding early on a Sunday..the ceremony started at 10:15 and by 1:30pm we were in the limo heading to our hotel and flying out the next day for our honeymoon. We were so afraid of a big wedding, but in the was short sweet and fun and we were glad that we did it. The most important thing is that you enjoy it. It is the celebration of you and your man becoming a family. So do what both of you will be comfortable with and will treasure forever.
cubadog cubadog 10 years
It is your wedding day do what you want. You can always have a big party after with family and friends. One of my friends eloped and her Mom got over it and it turned out not to be a big deal. Live for yourselves not others!
Nicadema Nicadema 10 years
I had a lovely wedding day--it's true, but I would have been just as happy hopping a plane to Vegas. The "Mothers" (we are both only children) had a FIT at that idea, so we had a small affair with 60 guests at a Historic Mansion in the wine country. I would have been just as happy doing the Vegas thing as I have NO PATIENCE for planning big events. They all swore that they would help , knowing how I hate detail crap...and I still ended up planning the whole damn thing practically by myself. I could have done without the stress, really. For me, the wedding day wasn't as important as the man I loved and the MARRIAGE that would follow. I'm four years into our marriage and still feel the same way. So a nice wedding, or a nice Vegas's really about the two of you and your FUTURE together. Don't get hung up on one day. The big wedding isn't for everyone. This is a commitment that's about the two of you. You make your decision based on that, and you will be happy looking back on YOUR special day, however you chose to celebrate it.
bluejeanie bluejeanie 10 years
if this is what you want then go for it! just remember that your parents and his parents might be *really* hurt if they don't get to be with you on your wedding day. your relationship with them is worth protecting too. i just got married a month ago and i hate big events and being the center of attention. it was tons of stress coming up to it but in the end it was all worth having my friends and family there. it really, really was.
t0xxic t0xxic 10 years
ya know, you need to do what you want as ur wedding, dont worry what others want u to do or what they think u should do. I wanted a big wedding I mean big glitzy, but instead we choose the little court house wedding. Later on when weve been married awhile (5 years) we are gonna do a bigger wedding with people and all but nothing beats ur first one glam or not, the meaning is still the same and the emotion is to. Its all up to u babes u are the bride and the only persons opinion that mildly matters against urs is his but urs is number 1!
jennifer76 jennifer76 10 years
We had a*
jennifer76 jennifer76 10 years
We would had a small family and friends, low-key affair at our house and LOVED every minute of it. There was no stress. It was a wonderfully happy and fun day. Our memories are wonderful - and I remember it all! No stress blackouts. The only thing I mildly regret is not having professional pictures. But, that's a small thing, IMO. I say do what you want and have fun! And if you find yourself terminally jealous of big affairs, have one when you renew your vows!
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