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Dear Poll: Do You Hold Out Longer for Someone Special?

It's a popular belief that if you really like someone, you withhold sex longer than you would with someone you're just semi-interested in. As weird as it sounds, it makes sense. You don't want your crush to think you're easy and you want to make sure he keeps coming back for more. While many people follow this rule, it doesn't necessarily mean that your relationship is doomed if you give it up too soon. So ladies, since we all have different beliefs, what I want to know is do you wait as long as possible to have sex with a guy you really like, or do you just do it when it feels right, no matter how long you've been dating?


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MisterPinkNoTip MisterPinkNoTip 9 years
Hahaha ITA BrandyNIcole
msame msame 9 years
I met my current boyfriend in the back of a mustang. He got me drunk and the next thing I realize, I'm making hooking up with some hot stranger in a Ford. I'm normally not that kind of girl, and I let him know the next day how embarrassed and mortified I was for my actions when he called (how did he get my number again?). To which he replied. "Look, I'm not a slut". If you feel that strong of a connection. Just go with it!
I will NOT have sex with anyone casually. Which means, unless it's a guy that I'm ready to be in a relationship with, no sex. I have a lot more guy friends, than female friends, and no, guys do not like having an easy girlfriend. Havn't you heard the Tupac song? "You can't turn a hoe into a housewife. They don't act right!"
julie090583 julie090583 9 years
if i like the guy a lot i will wait longer, but it's mostly a defense mechanism- there's nothing worse than going out with a guy a few times, falling for him and sleeping with him, only to have it not work out shortly after. so i wait until i know that i'm not going to get burned.
poizenisxkandee poizenisxkandee 9 years
well basically i used to be involved with some shady one night or just benefits deals with people i knew and was safe with but didnt really care about and that was no big thing but with my boyfriend of almost a year now; it took me like 8 months to have sex with him. its that theory where if you were given a button that said either push it and let a stranger die or you die; youd push it. but replace stranger with best friend and youd have to think or even sacrifice yourself. like, lets assume we are all mature enough to be sexually safe. so your health not as much the issue here. but your heart if your hearts on the line you dont want to get hurt, yeah? so you wait. if its just lust, then you kinda go for it.
elizabethsosewn elizabethsosewn 9 years
I waited like a year to sleep with someone the first time even though we were still not REALLY dating [it's complicated, I was treated poorly] but before that I had dated a nice guy for three months. we broke up then and got back together this spring, and low and behold LIke two weeks after we were ahning out again we were getting back together and falling in love. We're still together and have lots and lots of sex. HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. but seriously. Technically I waited like two years. TOTALLY WORTH IT, also because know I'm smart enough to take care of myself, and can communicate well enough to really build a relationship.
i-am-elle i-am-elle 9 years
With my current bf, I held out for a while. I didn't want to make the same mistake of having sex just because it "felt right", I really wanted to make sure I was ready & willing to start something serious. He did spend the night in my bed in the beginning, but we didn't have sex (or kiss!) for a good few weeks. I just wanted to be really comfortable with him first.
RockAndRepublic RockAndRepublic 9 years
No such thing as withholding for me seeing as i don't owe anyone any kind of sex. I also don't believe in giving anything up after 2 seconds, i'd only do that in serious relationships and 2 mos. is not going to cut it for me.
courtneyh courtneyh 9 years
i like sex too much, and if i find someone i'm into, i just don't see the point in waiting
kenziebaby kenziebaby 9 years
i do it when its right--and the first date isn't really righ for me. that's not to say i never have had meet 'em and love 'ems, but those ones usually become leave 'ems too ;)
KrissyThePirate KrissyThePirate 9 years
Me and him have been friend for over a year and a half--it almost happened really early on, but I held out--it was worth it :)
mlen mlen 9 years
my ex-ex bf was my first, so i waited quite a while before sleeping with him. my last bf i slept with on the 3rd date.. and then we dated a year- so it didn't effect that!
jJuliet jJuliet 9 years
I would never have sex with someone I was "just semi-interested in."
lilwildone1202 lilwildone1202 9 years
i think that its whatever works for you. with was the first night i met him :-X oops hey it worked out in the end. im sure that the whole 'being just friends' for a year AFTER that didn't hurt haha
allien86 allien86 9 years
I made my bf wait 3months. I just wanted to make sure and whats a few months if we are going to be together a lifetime? (fingers crossed). Basically im not into sleeping with someone I dont love. However all relationships move at difference paces and people should do what feels right when it feels right.
cosmetics-queen cosmetics-queen 9 years
When the time feels right for me...i've tried to hold out in the past for a guy i really liked, however, that only lasted about 1 month into dating.
sugarbritches sugarbritches 9 years
Marci I was thinkin the same thing! Definately when it feels right, but for me that's never on the first date!
alltherage alltherage 9 years
do it when its right. but i still hestitate to say the first date. it can send such wrogn signals....
Marci Marci 9 years
I don't think there's a hard and fast rule here. It's really between two people how they run things. I'm not a first date kind of girl, nor a second. But beyond that, I can't promise anything. ;)
aSLAMMINhottie aSLAMMINhottie 9 years
I'm a big-ole "other." 2 weeks after I met my fiance we started sleeping together, but it wasn't until 3 months later that we actually declared we were a couple and in love. After that we decided to stop sleeping together, mainly because of religious beliefs, and it's actually brought our relationship to this whole new level of intimacy. It's pretty awesome! :-)
SillyBecky SillyBecky 9 years
I usually try to hold out, but sometimes that doesn't guarantee that things are going to work out. My current honey and I started out as one of those "things that just happens" sort of deals. But once we realized that we actually care about each other, we decided that maybe we should focus more on building our relationship instead of focusing on the sex.
Lovely_1 Lovely_1 9 years
I just do it when i want and when I think it's right! Sometimes it is right away and soemtimes it it's a couple of months :)
7kimba7 7kimba7 9 years
I wait until it's the right time. if he's going to ditch you because you're "easy," it clearly wasn't meant to be anyway.
SummerBaby SummerBaby 9 years
the guy im with now wanted to hook up right away.. but i made him wait.. we were friends for almost 2 years before taking it to the next level
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