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Dear Poll: Is Sex Mandatory on your Wedding Night?

Did you buy yourself a sexy negligee for your wedding night or did your maid of honor light candles and scatter rose petals around your honeymoon suite? While it is expected that all couples consummate their marriage on their wedding night, oftentimes the bride and groom are more concerned about getting some much needed shut eye than actually getting busy. On the other hand, some couples can't wait to make love for the first time as husband and wife.

So what do you all think, even though the bride and groom are probably exhausted from the hype of their big day or just feeling the effects of too much champagne, do you think it is mandatory to have sex on your wedding night?


Join The Conversation
ipryor ipryor 8 years
I think "mandatory" has negative connotations. Of course sex on the wedding night isn't an OBLIGATION--that is, you don't HAVE to have sex--but why wouldn't you want to? There's something hot about wedding night sex, even if it isn't your first time.
titi4112 titi4112 9 years
I said other b/c I would love to and it's what I have been looking forward to but at the same time I would more than likely be exhausted and he will probably have drunk too much.
melda melda 10 years
yea I like to but I think I'll be so tired that night!
Ladytronic Ladytronic 10 years
uhh more than likely you will be exhausted and starving to death like we were lol, we ordered room service and slept like cozy babies, but we are old and all
tokenguy tokenguy 10 years
*coughs*three times*coughs* Pity the marriage didn't end that way.
JennyJen2 JennyJen2 10 years
We were enroute to the airport and waiting for our flight to Hawaii - so not on the first night and the second night we had been awake for almost 48 hours (except for the zzzzz we got on the plane - so we both fell asleep looking at the room service menu of the hotel and we were in separate beds because we both just plopped down where ever we could to relax!
LaLaLaurie06 LaLaLaurie06 10 years
thank god for the pill then b/c i'm a leaker! since i've been on the pill, i know exactly when my period will come...which was today....ugh.
rubialala rubialala 10 years
LaLaLaurie06, it totally sucked. I wasn't too worried about the white dress thing, I've never had a problem with "leaking" - but I was uncomfortable most of the day and really bummed out about the wedding night and honeymoon. I cried because I though my husband was going to be mad at me!!! Like it's my fault! But he was really sweet about the whole thing. If this can every be planned, though, DON'T schedule your wedding if you think you might be on your period! :)
honeysugar28 honeysugar28 10 years
Its a beautiful moment to make love for the first time as husband and wife but if you're both exhausted and I was then that's ok too.
LaLaLaurie06 LaLaLaurie06 10 years
rubialala - ooo period on your wedding day? how did you cope? i would have been super uncomfortable the whole day in that white dress!!
LaLaLaurie06 LaLaLaurie06 10 years
i can see that if you've been waiting for marriage to have sex, that yes, it will be very exciting. even so, i still said yes just b/c it will be fun to finally share this for the first time as a married couple. I can completely understand the exhaustion thing, especially if you are catching an early morning honeymoon flight the next day. lol. maybe one tumble in the hay and then it's lights out!
SWEET-C9363 SWEET-C9363 10 years
i was too exhausted i took a zanax and went boo beddy!
sass317 sass317 10 years
Ive known people who have and some who havent, its totally up to the couple. I knew we both were going to be very tired and didnt put a huge pressure on myself that it HAD to happen- in our case we did, and it was meaningful bc it was our wedding night- but I wouldnt have been heartbroken if we had been too exhausted- the important thing was that we were married.
bluejeanie bluejeanie 10 years
kungfubunni, drunk happens. i took care of puking hubby and i have a girlfriend who had to hold her husband's hair back on their wedding night! think of it was a sign of true luv :P
bluejeanie bluejeanie 10 years
i don't know anyone who had sex on his or her wedding night. it's such a long and exhausting day...i mean we have the rest of our lives to do that so sleep was higher on the adgenda.
kungfubunni kungfubunni 10 years
whoops... *your honeymoon*
kungfubunni kungfubunni 10 years
everyone kept saying dead tired, how about totally drunk? there's plenty of time once you're on you're honeymoon!
JustMe21 JustMe21 10 years
I said other. It's a personal preference I believe.
laluna laluna 10 years
I think it just depends on the couple. If/when i get married i'd expect to have sex on my wedding night, but i know plenty of couples that didn't. One of my nans closest friends only ever had sex once, that was on her wedding night!
WhatTheFrockBlog WhatTheFrockBlog 10 years
Not mandatory at all. I think that the "sex on wedding night" thing goes back to when people stayed virgins until they got married. When I get married, I'll probably want to spend the night opening my gifts and sleeping.
woodycakes woodycakes 10 years
well, i guess it depends on the husband and wife. if they're dead tired from the wedding, they might not even enjoy. just take your time. you'll have your entire marriage to get it on.
lickety-split lickety-split 10 years
here we go again with the suggestion that sex is the "biggie". HELLO, marriage is the biggie! will it matter in 10 years if you had sex on your wedding night? will you even remember (i don't, but it would seem the thing to do). we have more to offer than sex ladies. making a commitment to a person that says "till death do us part" and i will have your children is about as big as it gets.
demeter demeter 10 years
junebrug junebrug 10 years
Nothing on earth is mandatory. If you're too tired, you won't enjoy yourself, no offense to my dear, darling Sugar authors, but this is kind of a stupid question.
Beaner Beaner 10 years
Yeah - it's totally up to the bride and groom. Since most couples have already had sex before their wedding night, just sleeping together for the 1st time as husband and wife should be special enough. Then there's plenty of time for making out on the honeymoon!!
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