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Dear Poll: Were You Friends First?

Every relationship needs some kind of intense romantic chemistry to get things going initially, but over time it’s natural for a mutual respect more akin to friendship to also develop. For many people, friendship is just what naturally comes about along the way, while others establish that bond before they even begin dating. What about your relationship? Were you friends first or did that come later on?


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calli-gurl calli-gurl 8 years
we were never friends before. we talked for a month and started a relationship.
JaimeLeah526 JaimeLeah526 8 years
Sorta. We met online but I didn't go into it for a relationship. We'd just talk and be there for each other and then we started to develop feelings for each other and starting talking on the phone before we actually met.
nancita nancita 8 years
We were friends for 10 years, and also roommates for a while! It's funny how it takes a while for things to kick in sometimes.
Autumns_Elegy Autumns_Elegy 8 years
My partner was my best friend for the better part of a year before we started hooking up. I reckon it's made for one hell of a great relationship!
sparklestar sparklestar 8 years
We knew each other for 2 years as a friends and experienced a lot together. Then I broke up with my ex (his best friend) and my ex saw we wanted to be together and set us up! So we already know a lot about each other, the transition was very easy... :)
Rebecca14916991 Rebecca14916991 8 years
Like oohsexypenguin, my guy just happened to live next door to me my freshman year at college. We didn't really know each other for a couple weeks, then we just started seeing each other randomly on campus and at odd times; we started talking first just because we were being friendly neighbors. I honestly didn't think he was attractive at all (kind of ugly, to tell the truth) when I first met him! Then we found out we were in the same clubs and shared a lot of interests as well and started talking more. And more. Until we started talking a whole freaking lot - like, 4 hours a day after we got home. Everything about his physical appearance started to melt away for me as I got to know him better and better and found out what an amazing person he is on the inside. I just started to feel this incredible undeniable pull between the two of us, but never said anything because I didn't want to ruin the friendship. After about 2 months of this, we got into a conversation about people having "types", and right when it got really tense, he told me he liked me! I told him I liked him too, and we've been together ever since. <3 :) <3 :) <3
Silverlining10 Silverlining10 8 years
We talked for two weeks, starting with my being impressed by something he wrote for our GE class discussion, and him meeting up with me to try and find our lab. Then, I had lots of time to kill after class before meetings because I lived off-campus, so we talked. It probably only took a couple of days for us to get touchy-feely, then we went on our first official date two and a half weeks after first exchanging a few words in discussion.
ajennilynrushhh ajennilynrushhh 8 years
Friends first, had feelings for eachother, then officially dated.
awkwardturtle awkwardturtle 8 years
I love these stories!!!! :)
anna_muffin anna_muffin 8 years
We had a thing for each other from the start, but I absolutely did not want to date anyone at that time, so we developed a very close friendship first. When we finally got together, it was in kind of a weak moment (no, I wasn't drunk ;-) ) and I didn't realize what was happening until later. I decided not to back out of it, though, and it was a great decision. We've been happy together for almost 6 years and are engaged now. (When we started dating, some of our friends admitted that they'd thought we'd been dating for some time already, but had been keeping it secret.)
sarah-lynn sarah-lynn 8 years
My boyfriend and I met in high school and started out as friends (though he was a total flirt the whole time!), then we went off to college together (just so happened to be in the same small city), and then moved in together as soon as it wasn't required to be on campus. and tomorrow marks 6 years together!
oohsexypenguin oohsexypenguin 8 years
My fiance and I met during the first week of our freshman year in college - we lived in the same dorm, right next door to each other! We were instantly attracted to each other, but for some reason didn't pursue anything, not even a friendship. Then a year later we met again through a mutual friend, although I was dating my ex at the time (who was not a friend before we started dating, incidentally). We became good acquaintances, but I always had a crush on him, and he says he'd had a crush on me too. Eventually I dumped the dude I was dating (he turned out to be a jerk) and, shortly thereafter, took up with my guy. Almost three and a half years later, we're engaged and going strong. :)
ckeller825 ckeller825 8 years
My boyfriend and I were friends first. I've never been friends with a boyfriend before falling for him, but I think this is by far the best way to be with somebody (in my case anyway). I got to know him inside out, we were friends for three years, and then one weekend when I went to visit him at college, everything just fell into place. It was kind of romantic. :)
HeidiMD HeidiMD 8 years
We met because of a "friend of a friend" situation. He was friends with a guy who was friends with my roommate, and we met when everyone hung out together at our apartment. I thought he was hot right away, and we hit it off great, but there were some initial reservations and friendship before we jumped into a relationship.
simplyfab87 simplyfab87 8 years
When I met my current boyfriend we both were attracted to each other but didn't date because of a five year age difference( i was 16 and he was 21). So we were friends for a while and then after a while the attraction was too strong and we started our relationship.
AmandaKrups AmandaKrups 8 years
vmruby, same with me. We met in high school and were friends for eight years before we started dating. (Although we always had a thing for each other.) We've now been married for three months. I married one of my best friends!
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 8 years
Nope. From the beginning, we (especially he) had romantic intentions. He saw me as girlfriend-material, not friend-material.
karlotta karlotta 8 years
He had a girlfriend when we met, but I developed an instant crush, and even though he only admits to it now, so did he. The day he called to say she'd left him (a year later!), I wasn't doing a little dance - I was doing a GIGANTIC DANCE! But I still pretended to be really sad for him. 2 months later we were together; and it's been almost three years.
danzerdrea7 danzerdrea7 8 years
I wasn't friends first with my ex...unless two weeks counts. Its made things really hard at the end of three years when I realized I honestly didn't even like him as a friend. I broke it off with him and we haven't spoken since. Definitely going to be friends first next time.
DarlingDA DarlingDA 8 years
Mike and I were friends for over a year before we got together, and we've been dating for four years now! In my experience, relationships where you were friends first tend to be a little easier since you already know some of their quirks (and probably wouldn't remain friends with them if they were super strange).
princess_eab princess_eab 8 years
I'm a a new relationship with a friend I've had for awhile. I mean, we were always friends and got along well on many levels, but he lives overseas and we've never been single and in the same country at the same time. So definitely we've had crushes on each other but it just happened that we were in relationships. regardless, we came to develop a lot of admiration and respect for each other as friends and can talk about anything and do anything together. recently we decided to grab the opportunity since both of us are finally single, despite the distance. My last boyfriend was a friend of friends; I think it's the only way to meet people, really. Otherwise the factors are wild.
bbkf bbkf 8 years
When I met my husband, I was dating someone else, so we were just friends for over a year before we got together. I always had a crush on him, though!
KadBunny KadBunny 8 years
Oh yes :) I never ever date complete strangers; kinda learned that the hard way. Haha. 90% of the time it just turned out to be a complete waste; there wasn't enough to go by. You know friends will take care of you and you know you have things in common. We met when we were 13. We fell in love then but he was dating someone so I couldn't pursue it, and about a year later I gained a boyfriend of my own so then HE couldn't do it--just as he dumped her too :( haha. We drifted apart for a few years. We met up again when we were 17 and both available and the flame was rekindled. It's been 2 years and still counting. :)
Mykie7 Mykie7 8 years
My husband and I were friends for 11 years before we got married. In fact, when I first met him I thought he was a dork, no way did I want to date him. Then I grew up and learned to look inside of someone's heart, and I wound up with the greatest man I've ever known. (Next to my Daddy of course :))
Kristinh1012 Kristinh1012 8 years
We met in 5th grade. We became good friends because he lived so close. We were Boyfriend and girlfriend for the first time in 7th grade for a short period of time. We were always very close friends though. Dated again in 10th grade for a little bit. Stayed close friends still hung out all the time. Then senior year we kind of went seperate ways so hadn't seen eachother for a while. Around Christmas after graduation his mother came to visit and I wasn't home. So a few days later I went to stop by and see her, he was there, we hung out that night and then over the weeks things just lead to us being together. We've been together for 11 years.
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