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A Do or a Don't: Confiding in Others About Body Insecurities

A Do or a Don't: Confiding in Others About Body Insecurities

A friend recently confided in me about some issues she’s dealing with regarding her weight — something she's apparently been trying to manage for years. I was totally surprised by her admission; of course she has her least favorite spot, but she always comes off incredibly secure with her body. When I asked why she had never opened up to me about it before, she said that she was too embarrassed.

And it’s true, anything related to our bodies — emotional issues, health concerns, and sex — can be very hard to talk about, but sometimes revealing such a personal matter can help you feel like you’re not alone. Do you agree? If you’re prone to body issues, does voicing them make you feel better? Worse? Or do you tend to just keep them all to yourself?


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dikke-kus dikke-kus 8 years
I like to be honest. I don't like girls who hide things as if they are trying to come off as perfect. It makes them seem fake and insecure to me. Maybe there's a new low calorie food or drink we discover and can share. It helps to talk and your friends can be a positive influence on you. One time I admitted I hated my skin and a friend told me about chemical peels. So I went out and got one. Boom. Done. No more complaining. It was a great thing. It took years off. Nothing more nothing less. Everyone should do something like that for themselves.
JaimeLeah526 JaimeLeah526 9 years
Sadly it's kinda a bonding ritual for woman. Whenever we hear a woman complain about their bodies we say please your whatever is better than my whatever. It's really sad. I wish it wasn't like that but it is. I try not to say things like this around strangers but I do say it around my friends and family.
austerity austerity 9 years
~ Belle...well that's not very nice of your ex bf :( if he's overweight himself! It reminds me of that other thread; guys thinking they deserve 'better' (in their eyes!) no matter what THEY are like!
Belle1031 Belle1031 9 years
I hated my body with a passion until I met my ex bf. He seemed to have loved it and I was beyond shocked by that, but a couple of months in he told me he wanted a girl who was thinner and since then I cant help but think about how horrible my body is (I'm over weight, as is he btw). Of course that doesn't mean I'm going to go out and do something stupid but I also don't talk about it to anyone. Its just something I don't like sharing. On the other hand I make jokes about my weight with friends and coworkers all the time so everyone thinks I'm happy as I am. :P
LilyLyra LilyLyra 9 years
I would never talk about my body and how much I hated it before. But ever since I started to lose weight and began feeling better about it I will talk about it to my friends and family. So now it's cool.
talanted08 talanted08 9 years
Personally, I have always had a problem with my body until I met my husband! He has given me so much comfort with my self that I really don't care what no one has to say! I'm not heavy but I'm considered to be packed in all the right places! Since I've been with him I've lost some weight b/c of the courage that he's given me and yes, I was doing it for my self as well! I think it takes courage to inform some one about your issues with your self but it's always good to evaluate YOU before letting someone else do it for you! I use to care about what people had to say but now it's about me and my family and not the comments!
theCatsPajamas theCatsPajamas 9 years
@ sundaygreen - i am totally one of the 99% you're referring to! i have SO many conversations with friends about their insecurities that it's exhausting. i have girlfriends who can barely have a conversation without complaining about their weight or their skin or their hair or whatever! i feel like it doesn't matter what i say to them--they will keep complaining. so i end up just throwing comments like that out there and then changing the subject.
Lovely_1 Lovely_1 9 years
I rarely do...because when you point it out, then they notice! I just try and act like I am in love with every aspect of my body and then (usually) people don't even notice your "huge" flaw that you manifested into something big!
sundaygreen sundaygreen 9 years
I'm the same as Glowing Moon. I also find that talking about body issues, in particular, isn't therapeutic at all for me, because 99% of women you talk to either say 'you look FINE!' or, 'oh yes, I hate my _____ too'.
Veronix Veronix 9 years
Well, i don't go around and tell everyone exactly how i'm feeling about my body but when the subject comes around i think it's helpful to talk about it. I believe that when you are keeping issues like that in your head for too long it blows out of proportion and when you talk about it you realize that it is something almost everyone deal with (at least from time to time),no matter how they look like and that you probably never gonna feel _completely_ satisfied. So, why not think about other things and just be happy :)
ms-jamerz ms-jamerz 9 years
I tell friends and family only some of the physical insecurities I have - the rest I usually always keep to myself. I try not to focus too much on them though, it's not like they make their way into every conversation.
neonbee neonbee 9 years
I do with some people. i don't go through the details though. I guess after voicing out what my insecurities, I think about them less.
princess_eab princess_eab 9 years
I try to avoid talking about weight or eating at all cost with friends, because I know way too many people who have hangups. Instead, we talk about the positive side of working out - how good we feel, goals we're meeting, etc. I come from a very eating disordered family and talk about weight has always been a painful thing for us, so I avoid it at all costs.
austerity austerity 9 years
ehm...I realize half of my post was not really related to the topic..hehe, sorry about that, I suddenly had an epiphany and felt like advising people :)
austerity austerity 9 years
I genuinely like, and in fact am proud, of everything about my body, face and hair, except that maybe, maaaybe, my eyes could've been a bit bigger (forgot to mention this in a recent thread about our body insecurities). Though I'm not 'insecure' about it in the sense that it really bothers me, I know it's my relative flaw, so I don't mention it to others; as previous posters mentioned, why draw unnecessary attention to it, hehe ;). And it seems like such a silly thing to complain about. They're working, and I can see with them! what more do I need? I'd really like to advise everyone that you shouldn't let physical 'flaws' that don't affect your health, bother you in any way because as cliché as it sounds, beauty DOES lie in the eye of the beholder. Imagine my surprise when walking into a MAC makeup store during an afternoon of shopping with my friends when the manager of the store walked by and said he loved the shape of my eyes, and earnestly advised me to highlight them at all times. It made me realize it's really not worth bothering about your 'flaws' as someone else may find them beautiful! :)
ilanac13 ilanac13 9 years
i don't usually share my body issues with anyone. i think that it's partly to do with the fact that i had an eating disorder for the longest time and i've still got issues about how i see myself vs. how others see me and it just leads to a lot of uncomfortable conversations. i've had friends share their insecurities with me and i've tried to be supportive and i feel like i'm a good person to share those feelings with since i do understand how they feel and i usually give good advice to others. if only i could do the same for myself - then we would be set!
HeidiMD HeidiMD 9 years
I'm not comfortable sharing those insecurities with others. Like the post said, I think with enough confidence, you can "fool" people into thinking you are satisfied. I know that everyone has things they dislike about their bodies, but that's just part of being a human being. I feel like, if I tell anybody I don't like a certain part of my body, it would just call additional attention to it.
myystque myystque 9 years
Although I wish I were a more private person, like GlowingMoon, it helps me to be able to speak to someone about my body issues. Usually, though, I do it in a more playful manner to avoid the seriousness. And I do limit my comments because I realize that a lot of people probably think I have nothing to complain about (even though it's a different story for me!).
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 9 years
As for me, I like to keep sensitive matters to myself. I'm an introvert. I like to keep my own counsel, and sort out my issues by myself. It's nothing against anybody -- it's just my nature. It's how I operate. I like to problem-solve my own issues.
cmd0610 cmd0610 9 years
Heck yes voicing it makes me feel better! One of my best friends has almost the exact same body type as me, so we feel comfortable and relieved to "obsess" over our least fav body parts together.
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