Skip Nav
Wedding
Instead of Traditional, This Couple Wanted Their Wedding to Be Cool and Casual, Just Like Them
Wedding
16 Fun-Size Bachelorette Party Favors
Netflix
14 of the Sexiest TV Shows You Can Stream on Netflix in July

Do Tell: Do You Bring Your Significant Other Even When He's Not Invited?

Do Tell: Do You Bring Your Significant Other Even When He's Not Invited?

I was recently at a girls' dinner and one of my friends showed up with her boyfriend!! Why she thought that was OK is beyond me, but it was pretty infuriating. I really cherish my girl time so when a man was unexpectedly thrown into the mix, the entire dynamic changed. Boy talk, period talk, sex talk, and shop talk turned into watch-what-you-say talk! I know it's not that big of a deal, but don't you think there is a time and a place for bringing along your mate? I might be way off base here, so do tell ladies, do you bring your significant other with you everywhere you go, even if he isn't invited?

Source

Join The Conversation
watereatsrock watereatsrock 9 years
No. and I don't always bring him when he is invited either. I always asses the situation, and make sure it is appropriate for him to come.
Silverlining10 Silverlining10 9 years
My boyfriend and I don't really have the same friends, so when we go out, we don't hang out together. I like to give him his space to goof off with his friends, and he likes me to do the same. I've never had a friend bring her boyfriend uninvited...I think most people understand that's awkward for the boyfriend who will be surrounded by a bunch of women, and for the friends, who are constantly watching what they have to say.
michelle-c42934 michelle-c42934 9 years
Nope, it's just plain rude, I wouldn't bring a boyfriend to a girls night out, but to other events you should always ask first.
juicylove juicylove 9 years
like pretty much everyone said, if its a girls night, then obviously nobody should bring their bfs. but if its just random like hey lets do something with a bunch of people, then i would.
mlen mlen 9 years
not if its a girls night- then its strictly a girls night! if a friend calls up and says he a few of us are going to the bar tonight, come out- then its more an open invitation and i'll invite him out. but i'll usually check who's going first- cause if they list all girls, i'll leave him home!
emalove emalove 9 years
No, not if he wasn't invited. That's pretty rude. Most of my friends are married and/or in a serious relationship though, so when we hang out, our men are usually there too. We still talk about girly stuff too...the guys are used to it by now! And they usually go off and watch sports or play pool anyway.
javsmav javsmav 9 years
I don't have that many girlfriends in town, therefore not that many girls nights out. so if I am hanging out with my friends and my boyfriend comes along, it's not like he's the only guy. He doesn't live in the same city either, so I usually mention it to my friends before we go out. It would be strange for them to say he isn't invited b/c that would mean I wouldn't go either. It's not like I can leave him at my apartment to go out with my friends when he's come 700 miles to see me. But if he really wasn't invited, then no, I wouldn't bring him there.
Muirnea Muirnea 9 years
I agree with snarkypants too.
Muirnea Muirnea 9 years
Thats annoying, and very bad manners, if its supposed to be girls night, then I would want it to be. Its rude to bring any guest who was not specifically invited or that you haven't at least asked the host if they could come.
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 9 years
Hell no. Parts of my life (including a part of my social life) is independent of my husband. The same goes for him, too. This works for us. Personally, I can't believe that woman showed up with her uninvited boyfriend either.
LadyP LadyP 9 years
If it's a girls night out, my hubby understands that and so therefore I don't bring him. If it's a function other than a girls night, I bring my husband with me.
Sun_Sun Sun_Sun 9 years
we usually do things in a group, but if its strictly a girl thing or a guy thing then we respectively dont join in ....common sense, hello =)
Jeny Jeny 9 years
ohhhh nooo If I'm having a girls ANYTHING, I tell my girls upfront NO BOYS ALLOWED! That's usually in the title i.e. 'No boys allowed dinner at el patio'
Jacinthe Jacinthe 9 years
I think it would depend on the type of outing and who had initiated it. If it's something like my roomates and I deciding to go to applebee's because we're all too lazy to cook, I might invite my guy along - we have a lot of friends in common anyway. If it's something another friend put together and invited specific people, and did not include him, then no, I wouldn't. Snarkypant - that happend to my cousin and his girlfriend with our other cousins wedding. My cousins wife didn't want our other cousin to bring his girlfriend (even though they were planning on being married in the future, and now have a child together) to their wedding because they weren't married/officially engaged. He almost refused to go to the wedding until my aunt talked him into going.
snarkypants snarkypants 9 years
i do think it's rude to bring along an uninvited guest. but what drives me more nuts is the whole "no ring, no bring" approach to weddings. i think it is rather rude for people that you invite to your wedding to not be able to bring a date, unless it's a small wedding. but i've been to weddings with a few hundred people invited and i have not been allowed to bring my bf (who i've been dating for quite a while) just because we are not married. therefore, when i get married, nobody is allowed to bring their spouse. kidding, but seriously, i hate that.
cassee cassee 9 years
I agree that there are times when it's just YOU who is invited, and not your significant other. It's frustrating, because my best friend always includes her boyfriend in everything. I guess it's kind of like a package deal if you want to hang out with her...
lickety-split lickety-split 9 years
if i brought my dh to a girls only thing he'd leave, lol! that's so odd that she brought him, must be something else going on here.
Asia84 Asia84 9 years
My group of friends (the close knit ones) are pretty mixed. and usually whoever you're dating or currently married to is invited to things too. but if i'm goint to an event and it doesn't say "plus guest" on the invite, or i KNOW it's just the gals, then no, i don't bring my boyfriend. that's rude. i mean, i'm a b*tch, but i got SOME manners. GOSH!
laneylaney laneylaney 9 years
i ALWAYS ask but you can usually tell when it's inappropriate. When I'm having dinner or drink with a girlfriend or a few girlfriends, no way. if it's a small party he's usually expected to be there considering we share a lot of friends.
bransugar79 bransugar79 9 years
Truthfully I think it's inconsiderate of any friend to just assume that their SO is invited to something. I wouldn't have my fiance go with me to a girl's gathering. We do almost everything together and most of my friends probably wouldn't mind if he came along even if it was girls only but come on you have to have a little independence right?
jennifer76 jennifer76 9 years
Are you sure she knew it was a girls' night? I can't imagine intentionally bringing my husband to a girls only thing.
sass317 sass317 9 years
I actually had to stop being friends with a girl bc her husband just wouldnt back off. He always knew what we talked about, nothing was kept just between her and I, he would interject himself into situations between she and I that had nothing to do with him. He insisted it did involve him bc anything that had anything to do with "HIS wife" had to do with him as well and he would get involved if he d@mn well wanted to. He was such a control freak, honestly I dont think they have any friends left bc he is so overbearing no one wants to deal with him, even his cousin was sick of him. When we were friends he would email me constantly all day, and if I didnt answer fast enough I would get emails wanting to know where I was and why I wasnt answering him. When I worked with his wife he would email and call her all day, if she didnt answer the email he would call her office phone and her cell and if she didnt answer those he would email and call me wanting to know where she was, Im like, dude shes at the copier CHILL OUT!!! I miss her terribly, but it would be impossible for me to be friends with her while she is married to him. He would be the guy that would show up(insist on going) to girls night and truly not understand what the big deal was that he was there.
cvandoorn cvandoorn 9 years
Well if it happened just once, it shouldn't be a big deal. Maybe she misunderstood. I've had times when my girl friends tell me they are bringing their guys, and then at the last minute they make it an all girl's night, without notifying me! Don't take it so personally.
Kristinh1012 Kristinh1012 9 years
With my group of friends we don't really do anything that is closed to anyone. Everyone is always invited with or without your choice. BUT if it was specifically a girls night out, it's different. I think it's funny he would even have wanted to be there. My BF wouldn't want to be sitting in the middle of a bunch of women listening to them yap about a bunch of crap he could care less about. He's constantly surrounded by women (we have 2 little girls) and then when all my girlfriends come over, he scrambles for the door as quick as possible if they didn't bring their significant others.
Jude-C Jude-C 9 years
Nope. And, luckily, my SO wouldn't want to come anyway.
#IBelieveYou Supports Sexual Assault Victims (Video)
Things That Women Appreciate
Summer Love Songs
Struggles of Being a Single Latina
From Our Partners
Latest Love
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds