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Do Tell: What Is the Most Hilarious Thing That Has Happened to You in Bed?

We all know sex isn't really like how it's portrayed on soap operas — it can be sweaty, messy, loud, and not all that glamorous. But the great thing is, it doesn't really matter if you're totally in the moment. Sometimes it's the things that aren't so "perfect" that make the best memories and funniest inside jokes with your partner. So ladies, do tell, what is the most humorous/embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you in bed?


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mira1988 mira1988 7 years
Would have to be queefing.
Lacey91205 Lacey91205 9 years
I was trying to act all super sexy and i went to fall back onto his bed well the problem was that he only had a twin size bed, and i was used to my queen. I nailed my head aginst his bedside table that sits nest to his bed, it hurt really bad, but it was so funny after the fact.
wow lol.. really cant believe im saying this!!!! here goes nothing: me and my boyfriend went through the whole queefing thing but we laughed it off.. it was forgiven and now we ignore it. BUT this one night.. we wer having crazy sex, just amazing.. and i was about to hit my second orgasm and he was about to..'bust' when i quickly got on top and i peed on his stomach.. but i ddnt notice because i was climaxing. ugh. we was like "eewww..." and kinda pushed me off. i told him it was my 'women juice' but he was like "hell no.. that was pee". he laughed but kept saying eewww. it got all over his bed. and he told me to go pee.. i kept denying it though.. but it was obvious. lol. he took the sheets off and slept that night on bare mattress. :rotfl:
legallyblonde legallyblonde 9 years
About 2 weeks ago, I was fishing with some guys when one of them suggested that we swim to the other side. None of the other guys wanted to go, and I was ready to go swimming. I didn't have a bathing suit, so we both stripped naked and jumped in, thinking that we would be ok because there was no one else around. We swam a 1/4 mile to the other side and ended up having sex in the water because the rocks were too steep and slippery to climb on. When we finished, a school of fish started to swarm us, so we started to swim back. Everything was going fine until we were 3/4 of the way across, when a mom and her 3 little kids came down to where our stuff was. The guys on the shore started laughing, while we were horrified! We ended up having to swim over to the other side of the rocks, where we waited for 30 mins for the mom and her kids to leave. It was awkward but funny :)
aehunter86 aehunter86 9 years
I'm so accident prone! When I lost my virginity we slipped off the bed, he landed on my ankle and sprained it!! Then the first time my current boyfriend and I were together we were goin' at it so fiercely that we fell off the bed and I cut my arm (On what I hate no idea!) now there's a tiny scar!
JessBear JessBear 9 years
Once, when I was very new to sex and therefore very adventerous, my bf and I got caught TWICE in ONE hour. I had decided that I really wanted to do it somewhere on campus, so we found a single stall bathroom in the main tower. Unfortunately, the bottom half of the door was that slated style you sometimes see in dressing rooms, and the top half was frosted glass. Looking back, I can't believe I was stupid enough to try it, but we did. And sure enough, someone walks up, cups her hands up to the glass to see if anyone's in there...we heard an "eeck!" and then she ran off. You would THINK that would kill our ardor, but newbie me still wanted to finish, just not there. So we drive around for a while, and finally settle on this apt complex's multi-story parking garage. We pull into a dark corner of the garage, and, for added protection, hang articles of clothing on the car windows (not very effective, I might add). We start to go at it again, and everything's fine for a minute or two. But then! A girl walks into the garage, and sure enough, she's heading towards us. Turns out, she's parked in the car RIGHT NEXT TO US. It was hilarious (and mortifying), because the cars were parked so close, she had to manuever to even open her door. She studiously avoided looking at us, and I tried to cover myself with scraps of clothing. And you know what? I think I maybe still let him finish after that.
jordansmommy jordansmommy 9 years
One night in high school my ex and I were messin around and i had seen a package of pop rocks! So I told him that I thought I had heard his brother coming in the house so he went to check; and when he was gone I popped open the package and waited for him to come back!!!!!!! And when he did he got a big suprise and let me tell you if you ever try to do that make sure that everything is off of his member before engaging in intercourse cuz pop rocks dont feel to good inside of a female!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!
Sofiababy Sofiababy 9 years
oh man me and my boyfriend always manage to get a good laugh mid-action. i have several stories.. one of course involves the terrible queef. it only happens when we do it doggy style-- one time, we were switching positions and the queef that ensued was downright obnoxious. the look on his face was PRICELESS. he was SO shocked. i simply couldnt help but crack up. we still laugh to this day about it!! another.. oh my i get giggly thinking about.. but we were feeling experimental one day and we love the shower so we decided to try "aquatic kama sutra" or something along those lines.. which was def. a bad idea! some how i ended up on my hands in the wheelbarrow position with water going up my nose.. needless to say it was quite a scene, and in the effort we ended up losing our balance and falling out of the shower butt ass naked like two wet rats. we were just rolling on the floor laughing. i havent laughed so hard since i was a kid. it was awesome. one more.. mid action, my puppy managed to somehow licked his no no place and from the shock he almost knocked me out unconscious.. i even saw stars haha too funny
loveleighdancer loveleighdancer 9 years
I have 2 that are pretty good, although like a lot of you the queefing of course has happened. Probably my all time story that I am known for from all my friends was getting caught having sex on the quad with my boyfriend at my college. This was about 3 years ago and we were really drunk and I for some reason made it a goal in my life to do it. So we were going at it and all of a sudden a bike cop came up. We pretended like nothing was going on, even though the wrapper was right there. She gave us a warning and told us "to take our activities elsewhere". I was scared shitless after that, but we went back to my dorm and finished haha. And another story, one time my boyfriend and I were having sex and my dog jumped up on the back of his leg and began humping him. It was too funny. He was pissed but I kept laughing and we clearly stopped. It was too good though!
Camarogirl67 Camarogirl67 9 years
Okay so this one time...I was having, um, digestion problems and had to take laxatives. Gross milk of magnesia that I had to follow with orange juice chasers. Well I guess I took too much of it because I was on top and we went to change positions and all I heard was "OH MY GOD! What is that?!" I of course knew what it was and rushed the sheets off the bed, saying it was my period and oh I'm so embarassed. Then I made sure to wash him off in case he got suspicious. Sigh.
BeachBarbie BeachBarbie 9 years
One time, as the hubby and I were at the "you know point"... our dog jumped up on the bed, and then she peed on my foot. She was always jealous of me when it came to my hubby. We cracked up so hard over that..even though it was totally gross. Another one, is the time my hubby exclaimed, at the moment of you know what, something in Spanish. The funny thing is he doesn't even know Spanish. We both got a good laugh afterwards. He said he was so turned on..he couldn't help doing it. It was kind of cool too..he did have the accent down. :D
Hibalicious Hibalicious 9 years
Ohh my god these are hilarious!! U guyz r cracking me up! LOL ok here's one from me, we wern't having IT but we were about to, we were making out really badly and he was on top of me rolling me around in bed when i fall out of the bed and i hit the floor and my side table really hard!! oh and also the lamp falls on my head!! man that hurt like hell.. it was totally his fault, i had tears going down my face and he was laughing his head off but at the same time trying to appologize, eventually i started laughing too.. he he good times!
ninjastarlett ninjastarlett 9 years
I had my roommate walk in on us! She rushed in to grab something so she didn't knock (and we were dumb enough to not lock the door) and we scarcely had enough time to pull a sheet over us. It was kinda awkward since everyone knew what was happening...
sallyass36 sallyass36 9 years
Mid-coitus, I bumped into the bookshelf above my bed and my alarm clock fell on my face and split open my lip. There was blood everywhere and I had a fat lip for a week! Anytime anyone asked me what happened, I told them I tripped and bit my lip, but the shade of red my face went told the truth every time.
designergirl designergirl 9 years
SUprGrl923- I know about the peppers on genitals. The same thing happened to me, except I did it to him.
wednesday_adams wednesday_adams 9 years
These are all so funny! Here's mine to add to the pile :) The night that my husband and I got engaged, he had booked a really nice hotel room as part of the evening's festivities. So he had asked me to marry him earlier in the night, and we skipped over to the hotel, madly in love. Well, I suppose we were so elated about being engaged that over the course of the night we: 1. Lost a strawberry in my whoo whoo. (we eventually got it out) 2. Spilled champagne all over the bed. 3. and somehow managed to break the bedframe with all of our romping. Needless to say, I don't think we're welcome at that hotel anymore, but we sure had a wonderful time!
liltappa liltappa 9 years
This was not exactly funny when it happened- but now I look back and just have to crack up. I had just taken up dancing again so I would get really bad leg cramps in the middle of the night. Well- I was going at it with my guy (me on top) and I tried this little spin move that I read in my trusty Cosmo. As I was spinning around on top of him my leg exploded in pain! I had to jump off of him and stretch on the floor in utter agony, tears running down my face... oh yes and completely naked. He had no idea what was wrong with me! I was so scared to try crazy tricks for a while after that one!
pink_magnetism pink_magnetism 9 years
This is hilarious! I wish I had something unique to offer, but I only have a headbutt story. Not too exciting.
kickinthecherries kickinthecherries 9 years
prplegem21 - I have found that guys actually get a little more excited when they hear you gag. I told that to some friends who were embarrassed, too, and they said themselves the next time that they noticed their man was turned on by it. As long as you're not actually about to puke. I guess it makes them feel big or something :p
reese05 reese05 9 years
oh there are two things I won't ever forget: 1. He was on top then he tried pulling me so I can be on top but we were so into it that my head bumped his was very painful for him but we had a laught after that hahaha 2. The first time we heard the " vaginaa fart "..we were stunned and he even asked if I farted. I said of course not! It was my thingy... lol
prplegem21 prplegem21 9 years
o yea ...does anyone feel a bit embarrased if or when they gag from pleasuring their man....let us know
prplegem21 prplegem21 9 years
WOW you guys have some funny stories and i have one too one night my boyfriend and i were doing grown up things and i really had to break wind ..but i didnt want to stop that would just ruin the mood then i have to come back in the bed and start it all over a gain i didnt want that so i tried to suck it in .. i guess a few minutes down the line it start getting good and he starts going wild and im just enjoying everything and forget that i had gas then PPPPOOOOOOOOOOoooooooop...i go on my man stomach ... can we say embarassed ..i couldnt believe i just did that needless to say i couldnt go on cause it reeked and my boyfriend was just sitting there laughing at me i was sooo embarrassed but u know i really had to laugh too cause we both ran out that room a piece of advice to the ladies..handle yo biz befo u lay it down ... lol
brdwaystarlett brdwaystarlett 9 years
Hahah.. these are hilarious. I was witht his guy once who (now that I know him as a dear friend) is so silly that when you see him making out with anyone you know that all he's thinking is "pop goes the weasal where's the ice cream truck yay". SO, anyway, we were in my dorm playing around and getting undressed. I was wearing a pretty nice push-up bra. He took it off, felt the padding in the bra, and put his hands over his mouth Home Alone style and said "OH MY! They're NOT AS BIG AS THEY LOOK! It's a LIE!!!" I nearly DIED from embarassment so then I smacked him with it. Fun times lol.
N-e-e-c-a-l-l-e N-e-e-c-a-l-l-e 9 years
Oh man, this was soooo mortifying. Okay this happened with my very first boyfriend, I was 15, and it was the first time I was going down on him. My fist time ever going down on anyone actually. So I begin and as you can imagine how horrible my skills were at the time. So Im struggling/suffering through this, and eventually he climaxes. It gets a little graphic from all of the "juice" is now in my mouth...and obviously I have no clue what to do with it, so its just in there, tasting disgusting and Im doing all I can to not spit it out everywhere. AND THEN I feel a big chunk of something in my mouth....thinking that this "chunk" came out of him, I gag and immedietly everything sprays out of my mouth and onto his parents expensive sheet set (tsk tsk). As it turns out I had left my gum in my mouth (stupid) and forgotten about it. It was pretty much the worst thing ever.
LadyP LadyP 9 years
It was Valentines day a couple of years ago and I lit candles and put them on the bed stand and the hubby and I just started having fun. We looked up where the candles were and our cat had singed her tail fur in the flame! lol The funny thing is, she had no idea it happened and she was just watching the "show". Lol...we still laugh about it to this day.
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