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Do You Believe in Monogamy?

As a little girl, I always dreamed that there was one special guy out there for me. We'd meet, kiss, get married, and live happily ever after. I have to say that part of me still believes in that fairytale.

Although divorce is sometimes necessary, when I get married, I hope to be 100% sure about the man I want to spend my life.

I have friends though, who aren't into this whole monogamy thing. They don't believe that it's possible to stay in love with one person for your entire life. They don't think there's anything wrong with jumping from one relationship to another.

So what do you think about monogamy? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with one person, or do you want to live your life with many loves?


mrskrismendoza mrskrismendoza 10 years
I do. @ least I hope I do.
-Maryan- -Maryan- 10 years
Yea, I believe!
MamaD MamaD 10 years
Well when I married the first time I was 19 and he was my first serious boyfriend and 3 years older. Upon graduating high school my parents said they had money for college or a dream wedding. I chose the dream was the natural progression to things at the time. But on the day of the wedding I had doubts. In hind sight I think I realized I had nothing to compare this man or this relationship to. My knees buckled when the organ music started! My Dad said I didn't have to go through with it but I said I was still going ahead.I was a good daughter and didn't want to disappoint my parents or worse yet, embarrass them. Well that husband wound up being quite abusive and we divorced 7 years later. During my first date with husband #2, I knew right away that he was my soulmate!! Everything felt RIGHT!!!!!!!That is my only way to describe how right it was!! And he felt it too!!!! We have never been apart since that first date!! When it's right, it's right!!! I tell my niece all the time that some people date as a sport and others look for long lasting love. It's sometimes difficult to see who's playing on what team! But I've assured her that she will know him when she meets him. She has decided not to date just to date. Yes, she gets lonely sometimes but she does know people her own age who have described finding love exactly the way I did. With all that said I obviously believe in monogamy. I believe there is just one perfect person for each of us out there!!!
mrspiven mrspiven 10 years
i believe in monogamy in the sense that in a relationship, two people can be faithful. the other stuff is too complicated for me.
honeysugar28 honeysugar28 10 years
I believe in monogamy but it does take work relationships will go thorugh their ups and downs but if they're both committed to it they can make it work. I also believe that marriage is a lifetime commitment and married couples should really try their hardest to make it work unless there's an extremely huge reason to part ways such as infidelity or abuse they should try to make it work.
Bookish Bookish 10 years
I think monogamy is entirely possible, but I don't think it's necessarily natural for the species. You can make a commitment to someone and honor that for the rest of your lives- but I don't think we're hard-wired to be that way, I think it's a choice.
notoriuskitty notoriuskitty 10 years
I completely believe in monogamy! There is really nothing better than spending time with your bf/husband/girlfriend, whoever your love may be. I think it's important to be connected with each other rather than moving along with numerous partners. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years and we are still going strong, you just need to have the kind of relationship where you are completely compatible!
KadBunny KadBunny 10 years
I do. Obviously the honeymoon phase can't last forever but that's the great thing about it. Just knowing you'll have someone who loves you enough to stay through the ups and downs, love you despite your flaws.. I'd be so blessed to live and die like that with one person. It's such a strong bond; I can only imagine sharing it with one.
windynini windynini 10 years
Call me idealistic or old-fashioned, but I also believe in monogomy. I'm just really romantic that way:)
demeter demeter 10 years
Of course! I can't see living my life any other way!
Matdredalia Matdredalia 10 years
I believe monogamy can work, without a doubt. My step-father and mother are in a beautiful relationship and while they admit they find other people attractive, neither one of them feels a need to be with someone else. And I know quite a few couples like them. But...that doesn't mean I think monogamy is the only way to do things or that it works for everyone. I, personally, am polyamorous and am quite content that way. No, I don't jump around from person to person, nor do I cheat on my husband(s). I'm in multiple, open, happy relationships at the same time and that's just peachy for us. We don't lie or sneak about things, and everything is peachy. Personally, I think any type of relationship is possible, as long as the people involved all know the "rules", are happy, honest, and willing to communicate.
Indielove, I do agree with you on the definition of monogamy, but well, I was going off on the marriage thing... :)
I absolutely believe in monogamy. My parents have been married for over 25 years, with no end in sight, so I know it is possible, if you are willing to do the work. I think the reason a lot of people don't believe it is possible is because the huge divorce rate in our country. So, pardon me for expressing my views, but all you people who have children and are divorced or are thinking about it, you are destroying your child's view of love and monogamy. Is that really the price you want them to pay because your or your spouse want to be selfish? Did anyone see that episode of Oprah where it talked about the effect divorce has on your children? Soooo sad! Sorry if I offend you, but maybe you should think about it!
NdHebert NdHebert 10 years
I am 100% for monogamy, and 100% against divorce.
princess_eab princess_eab 10 years
100% for myself, but others may have a different opinion. I think open relationships are way different than just being a serial monogamist, obviously. I think monogamy, ideally, is worth the work and the commitment.
bfly1133 bfly1133 10 years
No prob indielove! I have days where I miss posts too. :)
Lovely_1 Lovely_1 10 years
indielove yes, I's a realtionship that is just between you and that person and no one else is involved. Marriage is another thing. But I do believe in monogamy. I mean, I woudl NEVER cheat on my bf and he would NEVER cheat on me. We love each other too much :)
indielove indielove 10 years
bly1133, I must have skipped over your post, although admittedly, I didn't read them all, it was Dears post that prompted me to comment. :)
Marci Marci 10 years
What's the point of being in a relationship without monogamy? So my answer is 'Yes to Monogamy.' Anyone who wants to have multiple partners is free to do so, in my book. Just don't commit to anyone and there won't be a problem.
bfly1133 bfly1133 10 years
Sweet Random! indielove, I second what you said about monogamy. (I posted the same thing actually.) :) My parents have been married for 26 years...for those wondering. ;)
indielove indielove 10 years
well, bluebellknoll, mine have been married for 22 years.
indielove indielove 10 years
Thanks, juliemyjewel. Because everyone was talking about marriage more than monogamy, but that's probably because Dear wrote it differently than I expected, from the title, so I felt that I had to say something about that. Lol. I was a bit puzzled.
bluebellknoll bluebellknoll 10 years
I think it would be interesting to find out if the people that don't (or do) believe in monogamy had parents that divorced or are still married... My parents are still together (over 40 yrs!) and I definitely believe in monogamy.
juliemyjewel juliemyjewel 10 years
No, Indielove, you are right!
indielove indielove 10 years
Funny, I thought monogamy meant being totally committed to one person and not having SEX and having relationships with others. Didn't know it meant just being with one person for the rest of your life. That sounds more like marriage than monogamy. I DO believe in monogamy and I believe in marriage, they're two separate things in my mind but they can go hand-in-hand, of course. Correct me if I'm wrong here. I'm not saying that in a pretentious way.
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