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Feeling Lonely After a Breakup

"I'm Feeling Lonely After My Breakup"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

So, I broke up with my boyfriend of six years about four months ago. I thought I was going to marry this guy, the breakup was really hard on me, not unexpected though. I think I've moved on pretty well, started working out more, going out with friends more, spending more time with my family, entered some new courses, working on my masters degree, etc etc, I'm keeping myself busy all the time. Also, the ex texts me every once in a while and we went out once, about two weeks ago, nothing happened. I feel pretty satisfied and happy with my life most of the time, I try to think of this breakup as a new opportunity to do stuff that I've never done before and change my life. I'm not depressed at all, I am very positive and happy. I don't know if I'd go back to that relationship, I think my love for my ex bf died already, and things don't seem to be heading that way anyways. To sum up, I'm happy . . . most of the time . . .

The thing is, some days I feel really blue and lonely, no matter how busy or distracted I am. I start thinking about the fact that I lost the guy that I thought was the love of my life and my best friend. I don't feel sad about him, I feel sad about the fact that I don't know if I'll ever find something like that again. I loved him, and we had an amazing relationship up to some point where it all crashed, because he said he needed time alone. I start thinking if I'll have that kind of deep relationship again in my life. I'm 26 going in 27 in a month, and I don't feel like it's so easy at this age to meet someone and be friends for a couple years and then start a successful relationship like before. So basically, I end up feeling I'll be forever alone. This happens about once a week, and no matter what I do, I can't get over it for like a day. For instance, today I woke up feeling like that after having an amazing day yesterday, for no reason at all, and spent all day like that. 


Also, I was talking to a friend of mine one of these days. He is a great guy and I've always had a crush on him, a harmless crush because we were both in relationships. He just broke up too, and I started suggesting that maybe we should go out more now that we're both single, and trying for him to understand that I liked him. I don't want a relationship, I just want like a friends with benefits situation. But he said some things that made me think like I am in his "friend zone" already. I felt kind of rejected, and that felt bad, so this just made my situation worse . . . So, what to do? I want to be positive and happy all of the time. Thank you all for your advice

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously on Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

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