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Feeling Love and Lust at the Same Time

"Is There Such a Thing as a Passionate Relationship?"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I feel very young and naive for asking this question, but I wanted to hear other peoples' experiences and opinions. I've recently met someone to whom I was very physically and sexually attracted. You know, the blushing, just-thinking-about-him, making-me-feel-like-a-school-girl-with-a-crush type of attraction, and it's kind of an awesome feeling, especially when it's reciprocated.

I've dated some really good, sweet guys that I've had a lot in common with and loved very much at the time, but I very rarely feel that intense physical attraction. The relationships were still good, and I'm sure passion, even in relationships with that type of intense affection, does fade slightly but I can't help but wonder if I'm missing out.


When this does happen — on occasion — it's usually honestly with a guy who, once I get to know, is not exactly someone I want to date. He's flaky, noncommittal, etc.

So, does it happen? Is this my fault for having weirdly specific physical attraction needs? I'd love to date someone I felt that strongly about physically, but it just doesn't seem to happen.

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it anonymously in Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

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