Skip Nav
8 Reasons Summer Is the Best Time to Rekindle Stale Relationships
5 Shows That Prove You Love Urban Fantasy — and What to Read After Watching
If You Want to Stay Married, Do These 10 Things Every Day

First Date Ideas

Group Therapy: Need Legit First Date Ideas

This question comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

The guy that I've been interested in has finally asked me to hang out — at his apartment to watch movies. I'm excited that he's showing interest in me, but I would really like to meet somewhere other than his place, so he won't get the wrong idea. How can I suggest that we meet somewhere else, without sounding like an old prude or that I'm taking it (going to his place) too seriously? I'm a very shy girl!

Have a dilemma of your own? Post it, anonymously, to Group Therapy for advice, and check out what else is happening in the TrèsSugar Community.

Join The Conversation
Expertdating Expertdating 7 years
Whatever you decide to do after considering first date ideas, make sure you show up at the date well prepared. You may need a change of clothing as well as some personal items such as a toothbrush, cologne, or makeup etc. Just because you have made plans for your first meeting it doesn't mean you have to follow through with them if they don't turn out as well as you planned. It's better to ditch the plans and try something else if one of you isn't having any fun.
c4rolin3 c4rolin3 7 years
i think it's a good idea that you don't want to go to his house for the first date - though going round to watch dvd's isn't an offensive first date! i've done it enough times x to be honest - if you don't want him to get the wrong idea, all you need is will power to say no and put him straight - as if that's all he's interested in then he may not be second date potential anyway and you could've saved yourself some money in the process!x however if you do want to take it away from his apartment - i'd bare in mind what people have said - he may be saying that as he can't afford at the moment to do anything else x so while 'this band are playing and i really want to see them, so shall we get tickets' would be a perfect ask - if he doesn't have any money it could be bad - so have some cheap alternatives lined up too x but fire that out there - if he gets the idea you may want to get out his apartment, then perhaps he should think up something else too - don't you do all the leg work! though it's great the initial date has been suggested by him- good luck!
jill10014 jill10014 7 years
Are you sure it is a date? He sounds a bit inept in the dating arena if he's asking you to watch movies at his apartment without dinner / drinks first.
jazzytummy jazzytummy 7 years
Agree with Janine and hypnoticmix....stay away from his apartment and do something where you can talk and get to know each other. People above had great suggestions for that. IMO, any guy that invites a girl to come over to "hang out" on a first date is either: 1. Looking to get laid with minimal effort on his part 2. Broke 3. Unimaginative 4. Indifferent I'm a bit old school, but I think if a guy really wants to impress you, he makes an effort. As great as it may seem to be as "sexually liberated" as men, I think an unfortunate consequence it that it has made men lazy and entitled. We have just made it too easy for them. Just my two cents.
skigurl skigurl 7 years
come up with something fun - if you don't want to have an awkward conversation with him about why you don't want to go to his house, just say "it's soooo nice out tonight, let's meet up and play mini putt/walk by the lake/go downtown for ice cream instead" if he isn't interested in that, and doesn't want to leave the house, then he's probably not in it for the right reasons!!
hypnoticmix hypnoticmix 7 years
I know movies are common date activities but I was just thinking that IMO a movie is a first date nono. It leaves you disengaged when you're suppose to be getting to know each other.
Janine22 Janine22 7 years
I agree with sabrinaland. This guy seems either wanting to get lucky, cheap or lazy. So, if you want to give him the benefit of the doubt, you could imagine that he is really broke or unimaginative. Personally I think that if a guy asks you on a date (I am assuming that is what this is, not just some friends hanging out), then he should at least come up with some sort of fun idea. He could even do a picnic or walk at a park, because that does not cost anything. I think this is kind of a bad sign as to what kind of guy he is personally but if you still want to go on the date, then suggest something different. If he likes you enough he will respect your wishes. Also, probably don't accept a night at his house watching movies for the 2nd or 3rd date either. If he likes you enough, he should at least plan somewhere to go. If you think that money is a concern for him, then suggest something inexpensive. But really he should be the one making the effort to come up with ideas here, since he asked you out. Good luck.
mix-tape mix-tape 7 years
I think you should suggest dinner at a restaurant first, then agree to movie at his place afterward. This way you can determine if you feel safe enough to go to his place. At worst you bail on the movie. You don't have to make out or have sex just because he's putting a movie on and you're sitting on the same couch. If you like the guy, just go for it! As the post asks though, here are some first date suggestions: Bowling, coffee, carnival, museum, brewery tour, pottery class, psychic reading, comedy club, stargazing, playground, sports game spectators, trivia night at a bar, arcade, or mini golf. There are lots of silly things to do with a new person, just think outside of the box, it'll pay off!
juicebox07 juicebox07 7 years
Not to be a downer, but maybe he just wants to "hang out" like the post says, and not actually go on a date. At least yet anyway. Although, if you feel uncomfortable about it, just tell him you had another idea in mind. My first date with my boyfriend was at my house to watch a movie. It was actually a really fun night. We did nothing more than watch the movie (and laugh hysterically because it was so funny), and talk for a good while.
sistasolja sistasolja 7 years
is money an issue? maybe he's thinking its less expensive to eat/entertain at home. im just trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. that said, his apartment is a little too cozy for a first date. try to come up with an inexpensive alternative. good luck and have fun!
Ac2366 Ac2366 7 years
In my experience whenever I got invited to a guys house to watch movies it never ended up that way. It was always a smooth or not so smooth move towards a makeout session or more. In my younger days I accepted those invitations. ::sigh:: I agree with the others that you should suggest a more public and neutrel location for the first few dates. If he doesn't like that idea he's not worth your time.
sabrinaland sabrinaland 7 years
You shouldn't be in this type of position. Any guy worth a grain of salt would know that you do not invite a girl over to his place to watch movies when you first start seeing other other. It's too creepy/lazy/whatever. I don't like the sound of this situation one bit. I personally would feel very uncomfortable, even if I do like the guy.
hypnoticmix hypnoticmix 7 years
Not sure where you live but when I was younger I often enjoyed a nice meal in an area where we could go for a nice walk afterwards. Maybe along the beach, a park whatev. I remember some of my best dates ending up on the swings in the park just talking the night away.
fuzzles fuzzles 7 years
Agreed with Pistol and Hypno. I have never gone on a first date that hasn't been in a neutral public place. (Maybe suggest meeting for a casual picnic in a populated park or lakeside instead?) If he's offended by you suggesting something else that would make you feel more comfortable, that's your signal to leave skid marks!
hypnoticmix hypnoticmix 7 years
Well first of all make no apologies it's always a good idea to have a first date on neutral grounds. He may also be asking you there not necessarily because he has Wolfish ideas in mind but because he knows he's grounded there and feels most comfortable there hence my previous point neutral grounds are best for first date. It does neither of you any good as a potential couple for one to feel confident and the other to feel uncomfortable. You should both be on equal grounds. Just tell him you appreciate him asking you out and you're really looking forward to spending time with him but you would prefer if just for the first date you can meet somewhere more neutral. I'm sure he will understand and if he doesn't there's your first warning sign to look for anther fish in the sea.
Pistil Pistil 7 years
Smart girl. You should go on a real date (as opposed to just 'hanging out' at his place) if this is in fact a first date. Just tell him you have a better idea and go out and do something fun. If he's really interested in you, he'll want to go out with you.
Raynne413 Raynne413 7 years
You could find something that you're interested in, or that he's interested in, such as a concert or movie, and say something along the lines of, I've really been wanting to do/see "x", why don't we do this instead?
How to Know If You're in an Incompatible Relationship
How to Revive Your Relationship in the Summer
How Lemon Water Affects Sex Drive
Healthy Latin Recipes
From Our Partners
Latest Love
All the Latest From Ryan Reynolds