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Is it a Good Idea or Bad Idea to Remain Friends with your Ex?

55% of you feel that men and women can be friends, but what about after a break up? Sometimes jumping into a friendship with your ex can soften the blow and ease the shock of separating, but oftentimes it is harder to move on when the person you used to share your life with is still just a stones throw away.

So what do you all think? Is it a good idea or a bad idea to jump into a friendship with an ex right after a break up?


Join The Conversation
The-Drunk-Lady The-Drunk-Lady 9 years
I think it's a bad idea. Right after a break up and even when a lot of time has passed, there will be jealousy. How would you feel, when you see him with another girl? What about if they had a better relationship then you had together? Besides, how would remaining friends ease the break up? Depending on why you broke up, why be stuck in the memories and relationship. I don't think a person ever moves on in this situation. Maybe after many, many, many years exes can become friends again. Move on and have new experiences with others.
yoan190 yoan190 9 years
I really think it could work. But it's not easy. Especially if the ex gf is still demands her "right" to kiss your husband and to go only two of them. It's just...too much for me (and also my husband didn't like it but didn't tell her because it means they would argue and like always...he would always be the loser). :-) But I still have a good friendship with some of my exes because they really are friends.
melda melda 9 years
its a bad idea thou my ex wants to be friends with me i cannot accept it
demeter demeter 10 years
Bad idea. It's just common sense.
sexyeyes sexyeyes 10 years
Personally I don't think is a good idea!
onesong onesong 10 years
i think it's a bad idea. although it would be nice to keep him in your life because obviously you liked him for more than romantic reasons, it does a couple things. it prevents you from fully moving on--you know those thoughts you have when you start dating someone else and you can't wait for him to see? that's not moving on. it also makes for an uncomfortable situation for anyone else you do, here, hi, i used to sleep with/fool around with this person. you guys should hang out! we should all hang out! haha. i just really think it's an excuse to not move on, to be honest, and that's after a lot of soul searching on my part. you find that once you stop being friends (and i'm not talking becoming enemies, just not being friends) it's like a mini-breakup all over again. better to get it done right away.
andaman andaman 10 years
I know a lot of people who are able to do it. No it isn't a bad idea. It is only bad if he has beaten you up or has cheated on you with your friend (just examples)..
cravinsugar cravinsugar 10 years
i agree with fab, but for me it is a no. I tried with the last ex, whom i broke up with because he cheated moultiple times, and he ended up jsut using me for booty calls, which i allowed to happen cause i thought he loved me again. anyway, i learned my lesson, no no no! haha
swwonder swwonder 10 years
I agree with Fab, depends on how the relationship ended and that there's no leftover emotions. I also think it has to be a gradual thing too.
designergirl designergirl 10 years
In my experience, it's been a bad idea.
katiedid0985 katiedid0985 10 years
Depends on the situation. Most likely you won't be able to be friends right after, but once you have both moved on it could be ok. Also depends on what your ex is like. If they're not actually a very nice person who you would want as a friend, then it's probably just better to leave them out of your life.
Deba Deba 10 years
I think its a bad idea, because there will always be the memories of good and bad things... there was a reason to end.
kendalheart kendalheart 10 years
Funny, I am in this position right now. At first I thought hell no, no way! But then we became friends but are both realizing now that I am dating it is more difficult for us and we might have to end it...neither one of us can see each other with someone else..its very hard!
nessabum nessabum 10 years
i think it's more of an issue of whether you were friends before the relationship or not. it doesn't work to stay friends after the relationship if you weren't friends to begin with because there's no basis for that relationship. also, the lingering feelings don't help either.
Fashion Fashion 10 years
I used to think it wasn't possible but I think it depends on the relationship and how it ended. :) xo
Ashlyn-Rose Ashlyn-Rose 10 years
I think that it depends on the type of breakup. I've ended it with a guy before only because distance became an issue when I moved away. We're still pretty good friends. If a relationship ends because you don't like your partner's character or his qualities, then I would say that staying friends is a bad idea!
StefaPie StefaPie 10 years
i broke up with my live-in boyfriend/best friend before that about a week ago. he's moving away for the summer, so that's good, but he's not leaving for another week, and it's terribly tense and awkward now. So looks like i'm just going to have to wait and see what the answer to this is.
calibabi calibabi 10 years
i'm only friends with one of my exes...and that friendship didn't start until about 6 years after we broke up!! i think that there needs to be some healing time after a breakup (though not necessarily 6 years!), so it's a bad idea to jump right into a friendship. let the relationship breathe and let the wounds heal...then see if you can be friends. if so, then i don't see a problem with it.
bookgirl bookgirl 10 years
I think it depends, at least for me, on whether we were friends before we got together or not. If we were, then, it's okay to try and remain friends, but not while the breakup is still fresh. If we weren't friends, then I just want to move on.
popgoestheworld popgoestheworld 10 years
I am friends with a few exes, and the key is not trying to be friends right away. You need time and space for awhile. I love the fact that I am on good terms with all of my exes. They were so important to me at one time and it's nice knowing that we still fundamentally have each other's backs
pinupsweetheart pinupsweetheart 10 years
Bad idea. You broke up for a reason. I tried to remain friends with my ex after we broke up - it didn't work for very long.
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