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Handle This: You Make a Big Mistake

Your new boyfriend went away on a business trip for more than two weeks and left his pet bird in your care. A graduation present from his family, the bird means a great deal to him and holds sentimental value. He's given you very specific instructions on caring for it, with the very explicit declaration that he'll be destroyed if you kill it.

You're not a huge fan of pet birds, but you know that he cares about it, so you do your very best. In an effort to avoid going to his house every day, you decide to bring the bird to your place. One morning when you go to feed it, you find it lifeless in its cage, completely dead. A trip to the pet store confirms that it's really gone. He won't be back for another week, but you feel awful and can't bear the idea of telling him. It's an inevitable conversation, so how would you handle this?


Join The Conversation
designerel designerel 9 years
ugh bad predicament, but it wasn't like you let get away or forgot to feed it. just fess up... and hopefully he will be understanding.
skigurl skigurl 9 years
for one, i wouldn't date a guy who loved a bird in the first place two, he better forgive you, and if not, he's not that great a guy
Runner4life Runner4life 9 years
Call him right then and get it over with. Then buy him a snake.
jessie jessie 9 years
tell him the bird died while in your care, you're terribly sorry, you'll buy him a new one. shit happens.
AyrtonSenna AyrtonSenna 9 years
When he gets home, play the "Dead Parrot" scene from Monte Python. Then tell him, that yes, the bird is not just stunned, he is DEAD. Seriously, just tell him. It's not your fault the bird died. If he is a halfway mature man he will realize this. I like questions like this much better than all those complicated relationship ones that give me a headache.
ajennilynrushhh ajennilynrushhh 9 years
Just be honest and tell him what happened. And then ask is there anything you can do to make things better like buy him a new bird or something. But don't surprise with another one, ask him first because maybe he'll think it'll be too soon for another one.
cjmara805 cjmara805 9 years
Tell the truth, and offer to buy him a new one. Don't try to cover yourself up and buy a new one before he gets home in hopes he won't notice, each bird has very distinct personality and he'll notice it acts differently from his baby.
krrn krrn 9 years
call him and tell him before he got home. he'll get over it eventually. it would be nice to offer to buy a new one but it's not like i was the one who killed it. i'd feel bad but it sounds like it wouldn't have been my fault.
valancyjane valancyjane 9 years
If you don't talk every day, I'd wait a day or two to tell him, until you can be calm about it. And if you can, get an idea of what killed the bird, so he knows it was not something you did.
cubadog cubadog 9 years
I agree that you need to tell him right away. Surprising him or trying to pass off another bird as his is a sure way for you to be single again.
urban-chic-101 urban-chic-101 9 years
Yeah, tell him right away.
Tami715 Tami715 9 years
Yeah, come clean. It's not like you didn't feed it or let it escape or something. Did moving it to your house cause it to die? Sounds like there isn't much you could've done to prevent this from happening. Tell him the truth and hope for the best.
Jaskearia12 Jaskearia12 9 years
Definitely call him right away and let him know. Waiting would probably make him more upset. I agree with apma, offering a bird is probably the best bet instead of surprising him with one. I should know, I was fish-sitting for my best friend and it died one day. I surprised her with a new one when she returned. She was PISSED.
apma apma 9 years
Come clean ASAP. Because the dead bird held sentimental value to your bf, I think it might be a bad idea to surprise him with a bird. I think offering one if he wants it would be better.
RubberDogTurds RubberDogTurds 9 years
While he may be hurt by it, it's not like you accidentally offed his puppy or cat. A bird is a little more replaceable (although some people may beg to differ). Come clean, but I agree with bluestar that having a backup plan by surprising him with a new bird might take the edge off the tragedy. Even though it's just a pet, you don't have to have that inevitable guilt hanging over your head by lying about it.
bluestar bluestar 9 years
Buy a new bird, he won't notice anyway!
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