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He Only Wanted Me Sexually

"I Care For Him as a Person, but He Only Wanted Me Sexually"

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our community. Add your advice in the comments!

So I met a guy at work like a month or so ago. Where we work we can transfer to another company at any time. Anyway, we would talk regular just like two people working together. As the weeks passed we felt more comfortable around each other and talked more along the lines as friends.

One week ago he found out that he was going to get transferred to another location. The week before he asked me for my number and I gave it to him. He texted me the next day. We didn't stop texting for the whole day. When I saw him at work he would act normal around me, but when he would text me after work he would say the sweetest things to me.

This last Thursday was his last day at work, but the whole week we have been texting nonstop. What's different is that he would text sexual stuff the most. At first I went along with it here and there. But he was just too sexual, like making remarks about me in that way. So I asked him if he just saw me as a sexual object, and he said no, but that he was very comfortable with sexuality. I replied that it was just him being himself, but that he talks about it all the time. He never answered me back.

I'm not even sad or mad that he didn't, it's more of disappointment because I thought he was better than that, and I thought he saw more of me than just my body. I mean, I really started to care for him. I don't know if in a romantic way or just as person/friend, but right now I'm so disappointed in him. Do you guys think that we'll ever have contact again or whatever this was is now done?

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Join The Conversation
missmaryb missmaryb 4 years
If he hasn't answered you back and his text conversations are full of sexual banter and innuendo, I'm thinking he's only after one thing. A guy who really wanted to get to know you would text you to ask you if he could call you to ask you out. It's really too bad he turned out to be a disappointment, but at least you figured it out before he actually tried to get you into bed.
henna-red henna-red 4 years
He was looking for sex. That's it. That's all it was for him. Best to leave it at no more contact. I'm sorry that you're feeling disappointed. But at least you know before you got in any further than you did. Look, darlin', a guy was saying stuff that made you uncomfortable, and you encouraged him. If you don't want sexual interaction, you immediately say so. Immediately. Not only did you not say his sexual content was making you uncomfortable, but you "went along with it".....basically telling him it was ok with you. If you weren't ok with it, you should have told him that in no uncertain terms. You led him on. Not cool.
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