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Hooking Up With Neighbor

Sunday Confessional: I Slept With a Dude in My Apartment Building

This week's confession comes from our anonymous Confession Booth group in the TrèsSugar Community. Weigh in with your advice below.

So yes — basically that is what happened — a neighbor, someone that I have the potential of seeing everyday, good or bad. 

I am getting over a relationship that I was in for over a year. This particular one has been difficult for me; but I started dating and so forth. I was hanging with a friend and after I left since it was the weekend and didn't feel like going home, I went to a local hotel bar that normally is pretty much dead, even on the weekends. I get there and it is full of Motocross people (super fun) and I had a few too many Hen shots. Went home and texted my neighbor who I have befriended for a few months since this flooding incident that brought neighbors together that didn't know each other. Anyway, he was up and I said, want to go walk the dog with me, which we have done before. This is very innocent, and I really had zero intention of anything happening. We walked the dog. He asked if I wanted to come up and watch a movie. I said sure, yada yada yada. You know what happened. 


I did have enough "scruples" to say "I think that this might make things weird," but you know he kissed me and that was it. So now everything seems somewhat normal, a text of "goodnight" things like that. So all of the analyzing and questioning is in my head — is this something that can go on, like a "no strings attached thing" or ????  I know eventually we have to talk, just never thought of him as more than a friend until now. Is this going to mess up my game with anyone else that may swing by my house? I think we crossed the point of no return . . . ugh.

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GTCB GTCB 6 years
Hahaha... if this had been posted about 10 years ago, I could have been the guy. Your name isn't Michelle is it? :) Anyways, people have casual sex all the time. As long as you both were responsible and respectful, this is no big deal. It's part of being an adult.
secondstar secondstar 6 years
I would just text or talk to him (depending on how you two normally communicate), and say that the other night was fun, but you hope it doesn't make things awkward between you. Try to keep the conversation light, maybe joke that you shouldn't mix alcohol and cute neighbors. From what you described he shouldn't think that it meant anything, but it's always best to make things clear. If you're both on the same page you could open up the conversation for a no strings thing, but I tend to think that is a bad idea (strings have a way of sneaking in there). Don't worry about it too much. I think everyone's had at least one hook up they shouldn't have. There's some initial awkwardness to get through, but you should be fine:)
postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 6 years
is this something that can go on, like a "no strings attached thing" or ???? I know eventually we have to talk, just never thought of him as more than a friend until now I'm a little confused by this portion of the post... do you want this guy as a no-strings-attached fuck buddy? Or do you really like him (as sort of indicated by "never thought of him as more than a friend until now")? Or do you just want this to remain something that only happened that one night and will not happen again type of thing? I pretty much agree with GregS about it not seeming like a big deal, but I guess just talk to him if you're feeling weird about what happened. Have a little chat about whether or not either of you have any kind of intentions whatsoever.
GregS GregS 6 years
I don't think it's all that bad. You text a few times and you had a fling. Not the end of the world.
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