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How To: Breaking The News About Your Divorce

Dear Sugar
My husband and I have been married for ten years but the past year and a half have been very rocky and we have decided to separate. We plan to live in separate bedrooms in the same house until things are more legally defined. Neither one of us is willing to move out and leave our children.

This process will take about six months due to the separation laws in my state. I don’t want to send a mass e-mail or broadcast the latest new about my relationship, but there are people who need to know what is going on. How can I tactfully tell people my husband and I have separated? Maiden Melodie

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Maiden Melodie
I am sorry to hear about your break up. Deciding when and how to tell your loved ones about your separation is a very personal decision and there is no right or wrong way but I do think it's OK to let those close to you know what is going on. Having the support from your friends and family is very important during this transition period...especially during the holidays.

Since you are not yet divorced, it is up to you how much information you wish to share. Try and remember that although you are upset now, you never know if the separation could lead to a reconciliation. I agree that broadcasting your private life around town is not necessary although I think telling those who you trust and love is again, a good idea.

First decide if you will you be breaking the news with your husband or alone. I think if it's possible to tell your children together, that would be best and easiest for them. As for friends, perhaps practice what you are going to say and prepare yourself for questions. Try meeting for coffee or going for a walk. I am sure those who love you will support any decision you make.

Join The Conversation
vbpce vbpce 10 years
always keep your kids in mind FIRST
Fancy04 Fancy04 10 years
Just be honest.
herbiefrog herbiefrog 10 years
> How can I tactfully tell people my husband and I have separated? Maiden Melodie i think that you just did family should always be family whatever the living or sleeping arrangements how much closer could you be than to have a child in this world? dont spoil it by greed or envy best of luck )
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