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Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris Wedding Details

Have You Said No to Being a Bridesmaid?

The dress is picked, the location is chosen, and the groom is still a-livin'. All good signs for the marriage of 84-year-old Playboy Hugh Hefner and his unlikely blushing bride, 24-year-old Playmate Crystal Harris.

The Daily Mail interviewed the couple's wedding planner, Kellie Olisky, and I was surprised by some of the elegant choices they made for their June wedding at the Playboy mansion. And then talk turned to bridesmaids and the dresses, and Olisky said it. She really said it.

"One sister is in Idaho. She might need a sleeve."

Unfortunately, or fortunately, most of us aren't privy to these behind-the-scenes conversations because, oh, we don't have them in front of reporters. But, sister Harris, in Idaho, I want you to know it's OK to say no. Here are tips on how to turn down being a bridesmaid gracefully, but sometimes you just need to say it in any shape, at any volume.

Have you turned down a request — gracefully, passive-aggressively, or aggressive-aggressively?

Image Source: WireImage
Join The Conversation
KeLynns KeLynns 6 years
I thought the "needing a sleeve" thing was maybe about her weight, like she didn't think her sister was fit enough to go sleeveless? (A shallow thing to say but hey, we're talking about Hef's bride here.) Anyway, I have turned down being a bridesmaid. It wasn't anything against the bride or her groom, but I was going through some health issues and didn't think I could stand up on the altar for an hour and a half. It was kind of awkward because she kept pushing me to be a bridesmaid but I just had to keep saying no.
knowmercy knowmercy 6 years
A friend mentioned to me that she wanted me to be a bridesmaid but that the groom didn't have enough friends to balance out her bridesmaids. I told her "Please don't ask me to wear one of those dresses. I will do anything else." So I volunteered to be her personal assistant for the day. I still got to hang with the bridal party but didn't have to pay for a dress and stand up in the front of everyone. Best idea ever!
Tabloid Tabloid 6 years
I think I did but it was so long ago. I believe it was when I was 14 years old. My aunt wanted me to be her bridesmaid. I suspect she still hold a grudge on me for declining and also not going to her wedding. All I remembered was I hate going to wedding and I didn't have anything to wear.
lickety-split lickety-split 6 years
yes. a friend had a destination wedding; in Greece. yeah, have the extra $4k to fly over there for a long weekend; NOT!
amber512 amber512 6 years
I have been a bride, but have never been asked to be a bridesmaid. myhousemd thanks for explaining "need a sleeve." I had never heard that term before! I told the dress shop I looked at for my wedding that I needed one with sleeves (for other reasons) and the woman kept trying to talk me out of it. Too bad, got my sleeves anyway. :)
myhousemd myhousemd 6 years
I've never said no. And, being LDS, I know what "need a sleeve" means. (LDS church members are fairly common in Idaho.) We follow modesty rules, one of which includes wearing not baring our shoulders. I'm actually at a bit of a loss as to why that sentence would be offensive. I'm glad she is aware of it. It's awful having to be the one who insists upon sleeves, which can be a pain in the butt from the other bridesmaids and the bride if they want everyone to match exactly.
ktownpolarbear ktownpolarbear 6 years
what does "need a sleeve" mean?
tarabara1229 tarabara1229 6 years
I've been asked once so far and said no. It was a whirlwind romance and she gave me a month's notice. It was also across the ocean, in Hawaii. Unfortunately, it took place right around Cannes, which is when I'm swamped, so I gracefully declined. I don't think she was expecting me to say yes anyway.
hex913 hex913 6 years
I voted "no" but that's because I've never been asked to be a bridesmaid.
Gdeeaz Gdeeaz 6 years
Can you put an option for those of us who have never been asked? None of my friends are married yet so none of the options fit, but I would still like to be able to see the results.
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