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I Can't Get Aroused

I Can't Get Aroused

Dear Sugar
I can't get turned on. I've been dating this super cute guy who I have tons of fun with for about two months now, but every time we kiss/make out/touch I don't feel anything at all.

It's really weird. I've tried relaxing and thinking of sexy things that have turned me on in the past, but nothing seems to work. It's not just this guy, but this has happened with other guys as well. I'm afraid to have sex. I've never masturbated because I don't ever get the urge to since I never get turned on. I feel horrible and abnormal. What Could It Bea?

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear What Could It Bea?
Don't feel horrible or abnormal, you are not alone. In fact, according to the The Journal of the American Medical Association, a whopping 43% of women between the ages of 18 to 59 suffer from some type of sexual dysfunction.

I would ask you if you have ever been turned on by a member of the same sex, and maybe that is what is confusing you or making you feel less sexual, but that doesn't seem to be the case. You could very well have SAD - Sexual Arousal Dysfunction. If I were you, I would talk to a physician about've got nothing to be embarrassed about.

Sexual dysfunction is medical jargon that best describes those who have a: lack of or minimal desire for sex, arousal problems, or those who have trouble reaching orgasm. If you aren't getting blood flow to that area or any genital lubrication that could also be the problem. These issues can be fixed with meds or with
vaginal jellies, so don't let it get you too hot and bothered!

Join The Conversation
H0T-Tamale H0T-Tamale 10 years
maybe this guy ain't doing it for you even though you find him very attractive .i think you should go see a doctor and also try masturbating and just explore yourself ,maybe that will help a bit but if you say you don't get turned on at all then you should definitely go see a doctor..much luck to you :)
snowflake snowflake 10 years
Explore yourself, find your sensitive spots and find out for yourself what makes you feel good!
bellamargaretha bellamargaretha 10 years
I've had some encounters with above-average looking guys too but felt nothing but with this person I'm with now the sparks were just instantaneous. If there's no chemistry, there's no chemistry.
sjpwannabe sjpwannabe 10 years
make an appointment to see your gyn. talk to him/her about it. if you aren't comfortable talking to this person then they aren't the right doc for you and find a new doc! relax! maybe try renting a porn or buying a sexy mag and see if that helps you on your own or with your partner. try buying a vibrator. if you don't want to go in person to buy these things they are available for purchase over the internet.
lickety-split lickety-split 10 years
you know if that many women "suffer" from it i don't think it can be called dysfunction, i think it's normal for that % of the population. maybe you haven't met the "right" guy or maybe you aren't ready. they have medication for women just like they do for men, i think sometimes they even give an Rx for viagara (spelling?). try a glass of wine and wearing something that might help you fell sexy, hot dress w/ sexy undies and bra from vistoria's secret or something. don't assume there is something "wrong" with you, although there could be. i have had friends with various medical conditions that had their dsex drive compromised. also, are you taking any medication at all? lots of medication can cause issues too.
beach_babe beach_babe 10 years
um....i dont know what to say
audreystar audreystar 10 years and the city.. "you are just not that into him"..perhaps?
mandeesparkle mandeesparkle 10 years
SailorMarie SailorMarie 10 years
LOL girls...
eye173candy eye173candy 10 years
t0xxic, your not alone- I am also scared of the headline 'trend alert: owls. DreamOfCaliforniacation <3
t0xxic t0xxic 10 years
So I read the recent headlines and I seen I cant get aroused I smell like lindsay lohan. Dont ask why thats what I seen.
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