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John Mayer on Masturbation in Rolling Stone

Say What? "I Am the New Generation of Masturbator"


"Blowing me off is the new sucking me off! . . . I am the new generation of masturbator. I've seen it all. Before I make coffee, I’ve seen more butt holes than a proctologist does in a week . . . I don’t like that question [about masturbating daily], because it seeks to make me sound strange if I say 'Yes, but of course I do.'"

— John Mayer in February's Rolling Stone. "Blowing me off is the new sucking me off" — does that make sense to anyone?! And, John, we wouldn't think you were crazy if you said you masturbated daily; we would only think you were crazy if you said something like "Before I make coffee, I’ve seen more butt holes than a proctologist does in a week."

ashleyheatherr ashleyheatherr 7 years
Once again, he has grossed me out. You're gross John Mayer. Shut up.
Cris1192 Cris1192 7 years
wtf?
Yogaforlife Yogaforlife 7 years
I have never understanded the appeal of this man.
Blackwood Blackwood 7 years
I think it was funny and that he didn't mean for people to take it seriously. Some of his expressions invoke very twisted an absurd mental pictures, which I think is awesome, because that's what sets him apart and make people notice him. Interviews are a way of promoting himself, and he managed to do that with this one in a brilliant way, so even if I don't agree with everything he says or think he's a genius (I never listened to his music, so I don't know, since he's not popular in my country), I do admire his wit and talent for self-promotion.
starbucks2 starbucks2 7 years
I've loved his music from day one and, man, I love that he's just saying whatever the fuck he wants. That quote about seeing assholes than a proctologist? Priceless! Thank you for trying to open some princess-eyes, hypnoticmix!
chillchic chillchic 7 years
Agreed, Acid Pops. I'm scratching my head right now.
runningesq runningesq 7 years
Dear John Mayer, STFU. Love running
Acid-Pops Acid-Pops 7 years
Did that interview just make the kinda sense I'm not in on?
hypnoticmix hypnoticmix 7 years
Well ladies I can understand your gross-outedness because a young mans mind is simply Pandora for a true Lady. You'd need one of those protective suits from the C.D.C. just to tip toe around in there. Being a man my self and being involved in sports and couching when I was younger and hanging around dudes most of my life I have to say that I admire John Mayer for his candidness. That quality to me is refreshing in a world where love is often duped by a temporary facade only to find out one's genuine character when they've become complacent about what they presented in the first place.
tlsgirl tlsgirl 7 years
Ew, he grosses me out. He just oozes douche.
cdelaney cdelaney 7 years
weffie-i think you are right on about his quote. that's how i interpreted it as well. he is such a tool. he thinks he is THE shit, but he is actually just a PIECE of shit. i'm tired of his pathetic, whorish musings, and then he'll talk about finding a wife in the next sentence. ah!
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 7 years
"Anyone else feel sorry for his therapist." medenginer, love it. I have this new fantasy: I want to down about four double shots of Jack, walk up to John Mayer, and kick him in the balls. He looks strung out. I wonder what he's on.
LikeThoseShoes LikeThoseShoes 7 years
aahaha i think he's fuckin funny. everyones so serious... yeah his music says one thing and his actions and interviews say another... so what. i know tons of people who put up the "i dont give a fuck" front... hell im guilty... makes things easier to laugh at... plus its just great seeing peoples reaction of you, thinking you're a disgusting tool when really they are completely clueless... lol it just goes to show everyone is ignorant... him for what he says and anyone else for giving enough of a damn to talk shit
postmodernsleaze postmodernsleaze 7 years
John Mayer is a tool.
oohsexypenguin oohsexypenguin 7 years
Ick. I can't stand John Mayer. He just grosses me out.
OmniMediaGirl OmniMediaGirl 7 years
Never heard of him. Don't know him. Don't want to know him. He looks like scum. Appears to need: bath, shave, detox, rehab, haircut, corrective eyewear, oh, and some clothes. Egad.
kismekate kismekate 7 years
He thinks he's the shit. He isn't. But his music is.
medenginer medenginer 7 years
Anyone else feel sorry for his therapist. I can only imagine what they have to hear. That's having to earn your paycheck. Mr. Mayer your intelligence level drops with every interview just quit.
suziryder suziryder 7 years
Ugh he is so gross.
Soniabonya Soniabonya 7 years
ugh. I don't care for Mayer. Ironically, one of his songs just popped up on the radio.
weffie weffie 7 years
I think the first bit was in reference to how ladies have started rejecting him, whereas they used to be jumping at the chance... I don't think it was part of the same flow of thought as the next sentence :) My favourite quote from this was his requirement that a girl has to have "a vagina you could pitch a tent on and just camp out on for, like, a weekend." Lolz... If he tells them that up front, it's no wonder they've started turning him down.
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