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Losing Virginity Stories

How Did You Lose Your Virginity?

When it comes to losing our virginity, men and women are not that different. Whether one waits emphatically, completes it like homework, or revels in its loss has little to do with gender.

Instead it depends on which of the following three categories — outlined in Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of our First Sexual Experiences — you fall into. "Gifters" hold virginity up on a pedestal, believing it's something precious to be saved, and the "stigmatized" see it as a burden, something that's to be crossed off life's checklist. "Processors" probably have the healthiest attitude: they see first-time sex as something to be experienced — one of many experiences to come.

Writer Kate Monro has been documenting virginity-lost stories for nearly a year on her site The Virginity Project. From the mundane to the unbelievable, she collects every story she hears.

Ready to tell yours? We've asked where you lost your virginity and who you lost it to, but never for the full story. Remember you can you always sign out and post it anonymously below!

Join The Conversation
Lila69 Lila69 3 years
Mine is really sleazy,I had sex for the first time pushed up somebodies car with our pants our ankles,we left a huge dent in their passengers door and dried cum after we were finished we pulled up our pants and ran for it d= it wasn't hot but it felt really great
idk329 idk329 5 years
my first time was not like this @ all...it didn't even work! i was 18 he had been fingering me too long & it started to hurt. when he tried to get inside me i was like swollen shut or something, it just wasn't working! it was horrible...then he thought i needed to be stretched so he stuck 3 fingers in me and i was piiiiiiissed it killed. i'm pretty sure i tore during his finger action...but we kept tryin lube, anything to get it in me. we finally gave up, and just cuddled and laughed about it. the next day we tried again and everything worked beautifully. although my 1st time sucked, i'm glad i was with someone that we could laugh about it together. we r still together.
Venus1 Venus1 6 years
Fair comment. OK could have expressed my previous post much better. I apologise. x
amber512 amber512 6 years
curious*
amber512 amber512 6 years
I'm curiou, why does one need something to compare it to? I'm very happy with my decision to wait and I like that my husband is the only person I have been with. I don't begrudge anyone else for making different choices, and I wouldn't want anyone to judge me (or someone like me) for my own.
Venus1 Venus1 6 years
and you comparison is with what exactly?
Venus1 Venus1 6 years
15th birthday. It was planned like a military operation and I'm now 33 and no regrets.
lauraxtc lauraxtc 6 years
13 with a guy I regret giving it to. UGH!!!!!
weffie weffie 7 years
Drunk with one of my best buddies when we were 15. Upstairs in his room while a house party raged below. Not an amazing experience, but comfortable and fun nonetheless. I wasn't necessarily in a hurry to lose my virginity, but I didn't have any regrets about it... We lived in a small town, it was just something to do :)
amber512 amber512 7 years
I was 23 and it happened on my wedding night. I didn't hold it up on a pedastal or think I was worth more than anyone else. I simply wanted it to be something that happened just between my husband and I. He was not a virgin when we met, but he knew that it was really important to me to wait. And I'm really glad that I did. While the way I did it might not work for everyone, it was definitely the right choice for me.
kels19 kels19 7 years
i was a cross between a gifter and a processor. i didn't hold my virginity on a pedestal, but i didn't want to give it to someone i didn't care about. i ended up having my first time at 14 with my boyfriend of 2 months. his parents were in the next room watching tv, which definitely made it more of a processing moment. we just were tired of waiting i guess. i don't regret it at all though, and i'm still with the guy today.
chequettex chequettex 7 years
I think I'm kind of a mix between a gifter and a processor. It was important to me, because of my religion & out of respect for my parents, to wait until I was married to have sex. I'd read and heard plenty about sex - I figured that the first time, maybe the first few times, would not be very comfortable and I was okay with that. I wanted to marry another virgin, because I felt that since I was saving that part of me for him, it was only fair for him to have saved his virginity for me. Eventually I met & fell in love with a guy who shared my values about this. When we got married I was 26. I started taking the pill a couple of months before the wedding (and promptly lost my sex drive). The first time we had sex was better than I had expected it to be, so that was good. It hasn't gotten any better since then, however, and sex has been one of the more difficult issues of our relationship for me to deal with. I'm very disillusioned about sex right now because I expected that it would get better and that I would like it more, but in four years that hasn't happened yet.
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 7 years
At the mall! But luckily someone brought it to the lost and found, so I have it again. Now it's in a safe deposit box in the bank, though someone offered me $40 on Craigslist for it... I think I might just go ahead and sell it.
HoneyBrown1976 HoneyBrown1976 7 years
I was 14 1/2 and working as a McDonald's cashier. He was a sixteen-year old customer and hot. I wanted him as more than a friend and we exchanged phone numbers. We talked on the phone for a while and decided to hook up. I met him over his house (brave move - not to be done anymore) and well, the rest is virginity history (to say the least). I would put myself as a mixture of a processor (something I definitely wanted to experience as a part of adolescent life) and "the stigmatized" (it was something that I wanted to experience no later than 17, so that I could also share the experience with my girlfriends).
ladylove004 ladylove004 7 years
I was 2 weeks away from turning 19, with my still bf of 4 and a half years, we had only been dating for a month or so, so I was shocked that I did it so quickly being that I barely knew him, but it was fine, except it did hurt a lot, and the next time got waaaay better lol I think I'm a processor, I didn't want my first time to be w just any guy but I didn't feel the need to wait forever, and wasn't expecting much out of it, however, all in all I love my bf and don't regret one sec of it or out relationship!
SMRster SMRster 7 years
Just last year...actually barely over a year (july 16th to be exact). I was 23. This guy and I hadn't seen each other in 5 years. We had be friends in school, and after kept in touch. I'd had a huge crush on him in school and I came to learn he'd felt the same. We flirted online constantly. And talked on the phone too. We never dated, but we had strong feelings for each other (and still do). We were finally going to be in the same place at the same time and it kind of became a plan. I wanted him to be my first. When I got there I wasn't quite sure we would go through with it, but we did. I'm very glad we did. I haven't regretted it for a second. (we are still friends, we keep in contact online and text and phone) I'm glad to have no had sex at a young age. I don't think I was ready for it.
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