My boyfriend's best friend constantly butts into our relationship. It drives me crazy because it's none of his business. I don't know what to do because I can't stand him - but I know this is going to be a losing battle. Can I seriously ask my boyfriend to dump his best friend for me? Livid Liv
To see DEARSUGAR'S answer
Dear Livid Liv
There eventually does come a time in every man's life where he chooses his love over his friends. But - he's got to be ready to do that or else he's going to hate you for trying to come in between his friendships. Be patient, and try your best to be nice to the friend because you will only come out looking like a lady in the end.
Do as much damage control as you can to make you and your boyfriend's life easier (keep in mind, this can't be fun for him either). Don't start arguments with the friend, and try your best not to be sarcastic. Let him know that he can't walk all over you, but try and defend yourself without being a grade A bit*h.
All you can do is manage your own behavior. For example, limit the amount of time you have to spend with him and when you are together, try and ask questions and show an interest in him - even if you have to fake it. Talk less and listen more.
I'll bet that he just feels threatened by you and in his own way he's testing his friend. When "one of the guys" gets a girlfriend they don't like it because they are losing another wing man and drinking buddy.
If all else fails, use everything you've got to set him up with the hot waitress at the bar. It's hard to hate a woman who helps you get laid.