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My Boyfriend Doesn't Ask Me to Wear Lingerie

Sunday Confessional: I'm Sad My Boyfriend Doesn't Ask Me to Wear Lingerie

This week's confession comes from our anonymous Confession Booth group in the TrèsSugar Community. Weigh in with your advice below.

I am sure a lot or maybe all of you guys LOVE women in lingerie, right? My fiance sure does, and he missed the show of Victoria's Secret. He was busy working a lot, so this morning he found that he could watch it. Not a problem for me. 

But what bothers me is that . . . he never has asked me to wear lingerie for him, or ask me to surprise him something for the night. I had been with him for two years, and recently engaged. I had several pieces of lingeries. I had bought it on purpose to surprise him a few times in the past, but he never asks me to wear it on his own. I think I am attractive, and have a nice body.  So, I don't even know why he so loves to see women in lingerie from the Internet, or shows, but me?

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Join The Conversation
kurniakasih kurniakasih 5 years
just wear it. My husband doesn't ask me too partly because he enjoys nudity more than lingerie but he also doesn't feel comfortable asking it because he feels as if it was demanding of him to ask for this and that for bedroom purposes. So yah, just wear it, surprise him, he'll love it.
la-nouvelle-vague la-nouvelle-vague 5 years
He probably doesn't ask you to do it because he doesn't want you to feel pressured into doing something that he may think you're not entirely comfortable with. I think you would have an actual problem in your relationship if he wanted to only look at models in lingerie but every time you tried to dress up in lingerie he told you not to bother. As everyone else has said, you don't need to wait for him to ask you, just take the initiative yourself.
ChrissyLee ChrissyLee 5 years
There is no reason you should be waiting for him to ask you! Just do it, you already know it will make him happy. My bf never asks me to wear it but when I do his face lights up like a kid on Christmas. He probably doesn't want to demand things out of you, especially sex related things, and you should feel happy for that. The next time you do it ask him if he likes it and ask him what he would like to see you in. Make it fun instead of worrying about what hasn't happened in the past.
Gabriela-Une-Vie-Saine Gabriela-Une-Vie-Saine 5 years
Just do it without him asking! Maybe he feels like you don't particularly like doing it, or he doesn't want you to have to buy it just for him (lingerie is expensive!!). But if it's something you feel comfortable doing, just surprise him with it :)
dikke-kus dikke-kus 5 years
Put it on. Why does he need to ask you?
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
There's absolutely no reason to assume you're not the full measure of the woman he wants. Pax you never cease to amaze me with how thoughtless and hurtful your comments are. Agreed with ducky. I 100% guarantee he will NOT reject you if you take the initiative to put on some sexy lingerie. How does your relationship work? Does you have to explicitly ask him to do sexy things for you? Might want to focus on some bedroom communication, maybe both of you are a little shy sexually and that's something you can work on as a couple.
livinlife1985 livinlife1985 5 years
Don't make him ask for it.... Just DO IT!!! :) I'm sure he will love it
Bubbles12 Bubbles12 5 years
The truth is most men are just happy you show up and get naked. He may not one to share fantasies or ask for what he wants, or he may not care at all what you wear. So this is what I do, I wear what turns me on. That is doing my husband a huge favor.
luckyduckyy luckyduckyy 5 years
Why does he need to ask? See it from his side. Maybe he's wondering why you've never worn lingerie, even though you know he loves it. Relationships are about give and take, on both sides. You shouldn't sit around waiting for him to do something you're perfectly capable of doing yourself (i.e., putting on lingerie for him; don't wait for him to ask- just do it yourself). You're adhering to strict male and female roles, where the man asks or demands the woman do something, and the woman then conforms. Why don't you be different, and instead just surprise him by wearing lingerie one night?
pax4pax pax4pax 5 years
Sounds like you are not his full measure of the woman he wants.
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