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My Husband Is Making Me Fat

Dear Sugar
Ever since I got married, I have put on about 12 lbs. I love being a newlywed and cooking for my husband, but he really only feels full and satisfied from meats and heavier foods that I am not typically used to eating.

If I am going to cook, then I will try my best to make something that we both eat, because cooking separately is really too much of a pain. I'll always include some kind of salad and side veggie, but I've got to try and figure out a way to get a handle on my intake.

He is 175 lbs and I am only 116 lbs (now 128) so we should definitely not be eating the same exact foods and portion sizes. Do you have any suggestions for me? Widening Wife

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Widening Wife,
I have heard this time and time again. Newlyweds are constantly adjusting to each other. Eating is just another example of having to figure out ways of combining two different lifestyles. But just because your man has a big appetite and a bigger stomach than you do, doesn't mean that you can't enjoy the same meal together.

Try pre-plating your meal before putting everything out on the table. This way hubby can reach for seconds, but you'll know that what you've eaten is a sufficient amount for you. Also, put your fork down in between bites and take a sip of water. This will help prevent you from overeating when you feel the signs of fullness. It will also keep you hydrated.

Eating can become totally automatic, and it's easy to continue to eat while engaging in conversation. Eating can also provide a distraction from a negative emotion or anxious moment. While adjusting to your new life, you are more likely to be having deeper discussions. This is both and exciting time as well as a stressful one. Be sure not to reach for your fork as a means of comfort.

Lastly, don't forget that men can generally eat more than women and remain slim. In fact, they need to intake an average of 20-30% more calories than we do. So stop feeling like you have to keep up with him; you don't. Marriage is a partnership, not a competition. Remember that you are on the same team.

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