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Reasons For Unfriending Someone on Facebook 2010-10-06 12:20:48

What Makes You Unfriend Someone on Facebook?

Defriending, unfriending, whatever you want to call it — sometimes it's necessary to break the bonds of Facebook friendship. Once when an acquaintance posted a homophobic status update, I decided to unfriend (it didn't help that he constantly blasted me with messages promoting parties). Well, a couple days later, I got a friend request from him! How did he know I had unfriended him so quickly? He's still lingering in friend-request limbo.

Cutting off a Facebook friendship is likely easier than a non-virtual friendship breakup. It doesn't require confrontation and you probably wouldn't do it to someone you see every day. Academics have looked into the top reasons for unfriending a person. The number one reason: repetitive posts. One researcher explained: "The 100th post about your favorite band is no longer interesting." Word. The second most-popular reason: controversial posts about religion or politics. And coming in third: racists or crude comments.

If someone hasn't completely offended you, you might consider softer options: hiding them from your feed or upping your privacy settings for specific people who can't help but share inappropriate stuff on your wall. Maybe this has happened to you. Have you ever gone to someone's page and realized you suddenly can't see tagged photos or write on the wall? Go ahead and chalk it up to responsible privacy settings, but it'll still bruise your ego a bit.

We asked you how long you wait to become Facebook friends with someone, but now I want to know: what will it take for you to unfriend a person?

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Join The Conversation
Kaybaybayx Kaybaybayx 6 years
I defriended a few fake friends. Then made peace with them by blocked them off my news feed.
danakscully64 danakscully64 6 years
I've only unfriended one person: my ex's brother (the day of the breakup). 3 times during that relationship, he had said VERY mean things about me to the ex. Things about me that were so untrue that it was laughable. He tried to break us up for no reason (he did this with past gfs too) and he was very two faced. I was always nice to him, I would buy him X-Mas gifts, even when he didn't get me anything, I would bring him and his mother lots of homemade goodies, got him birthday gifts, etc. I never really cared for him, but I didn't talk crap behind his back. Ready for the kicker? My ex flew out here for a wedding and he found out at the end of his trip that his brother had been "keeping an eye on him to make sure he wasn't going to sneak off and see me." He even checked our PHONE TEXT MESSAGES. This guy is 32 years old, my ex is 25. Can you believe this behavior? He's crazy. He better hope he doesn't run into me at the store or something, he's going to get a piece of my mind.
Studio16 Studio16 6 years
I really only unfriend people if I don't really talk to them. For instance, lot of younger kids add me as a friend, because they're friends with my little sister and things like that. I don't really want to offend them, so I'll accept but then wait a few weeks and delete them. It's not like we even talk on there, and I'm pretty sure they're just adding me so that they have one more friend haha. Most of the time, these girls don't even notice. Of course, my sister and I have both unfriended a couple relatives after they sent us very angry messages for forgetting a cousin's birthday. I have considered deleting people for homophobic comments or racial slurs, but have found that it's not worth the drama - I just hide them from my feed. Really, unless you are starting drama or I just don't talk to you anymore, you're going to be on my friends list. Whether or not I choose to interact with you is still up for debate though. I don't really unfriend people a lot because I have pretty strict standards for accepting a friend request. I'm pretty intent on keeping my online personna private. (I don't even really want a Facebook, but it's really the only quick and easy way to keep in touch with friends.)
jocupcake jocupcake 6 years
I've defriended various college acquaintances who constantly posted homophobic, anti-muslim, and flat-out ridiculous stuff. Ex: a month of status posts and links regarding how Obama was going to kill off all our old people with death panels. I should note that though this was horrifying, it was also so insanely funny that I considered keeping this person around just so I could laugh at them.
skukie skukie 6 years
I unfriended a man that I had met because I found out that he was on a sex offender list. I was working as a preschool teacher at the time and thought it would be best if I did. I didn't really know him that well anyway.
JessRose JessRose 6 years
yup - hide them in the news feed
a-million-suns a-million-suns 6 years
I think I've only defriended someone once. It was the sister of one of my sort-of friends from high school. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to friend her in the first place since I don't know her, but since she's directly related to someone I know, I said eh, all right. I soon found that all her posts were promotions for her jewelry. So really she just friended me to try to sell her stuff. Thus, defriended. But usually if I don't like someone's posts I'll just hide them. Or get angry and go on a rant and then secretly feel self-satisfied due to my obvious superiority (just kidding.) I've been defriended several times and have no idea why since I mostly avoid politics and other controversial topics.
LikeThoseShoes LikeThoseShoes 6 years
I've only deleted people for 3 reasons: 1)a party was mentioned that was being thrown to remember one of my deceased friends... someone made a comment along the lines of "F*ck that party" and I explained what the party meant to me and my friends and still received heartless remarks... DELETED! 2) Ex-BF... I just couldn't stay friends. Part of moving on is letting go. and 3) Friends that post on my FB wall with tacky, offensive remarks. I have family that I'm friends with so clearly I dont want this kind of stuff on my page.
kimmieb124 kimmieb124 6 years
I never defriended anyone, but I also don't accept friend requests from just anyone and I use the strict privacy settings. I don't want random people I never talk to looking at my pictures or knowing what I'm up to.
whats-her-name whats-her-name 6 years
Ugh I've deleted several people because I got sick of seeing their depressingly dramatic status updates. For the love of God, shut up!! I couldn't care less how well your life relates to the lyrics of an Evanescence song!!
amber512 amber512 6 years
I have never defriended anyone. I have hidden posts from those who want to update seemingly every two minutes. But mostly, I don't add people in the first place I think I might defriend.
MissSushi MissSushi 6 years
I've never unfriended anyone. When one friendship a year or so ago dissolved, she unfriended me before I had a chance. That being said, what people post doesn't bother me. It's their facebook and they can post whatever they want. I block the games/aps, I'm not interested in, and let people post what they want. Most of my friends are pretty decent though, I don't have anyone who posts horrid politcal stuff or shares really bad TMI, I just don't keep end up friends with those kinds of people because of my own personality. Almost NOTHING irritates me abotu people on facebook. I get slightly irritated with people who post vague comments in an attempt for attention, but thats about it. The 20 or so people who post, omg is everything okay??!?!?!? give me great amounts of amusement.
janneth janneth 6 years
I just hide them. And forget about them. When they post too much.
RoaringSilence RoaringSilence 6 years
Like most of the others, if someone's status updates are just too annoying and dull, I hide them from my news feed. Sometimes these are people I really enjoy hanging out with, so I need Facebook to talk to them, but I don't want to read about their every thought. I can't think of a lot of times I've unfriended people. Sometimes friends of friends add me, and I accept and then forever wait for them to say anything. Those usually go pretty quickly. I don't usually ask people for their facebook info if I know I'm not going to talk to them very much, so my friend list is pretty uncluttered. There are some people on there that I never chat with, but they're old friends who used to live close, and I keep them around cause I never know when I'll be in their town again and want to see them.
Pistil Pistil 6 years
I've unfriended people with constant and irritating status updates, but they weren't really friends of mine in the first place. There's a lot of people I could probably unfriend on the basis that I never actually talk to them, but I'm too lazy to weed through my friend list.
gingirl gingirl 6 years
I actually defriended a couple of family members after I had to go through a lot of drama with them. It was a hard decision, and part of me wishes I had just hid them instead, but I just couldn't deal with them anymore and I didn't want them to know anything about my life to try and use against me. Yea, I'm not surrounded by the best extended family. I would LOVE to know how one of them found out so fast! It seemed like an hour later, I got a long message about how horrible I was and why couldn't we be friends? An hour! Jeez. I'm on the strictest privacy settings now.
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