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Remembering an Ex's Birthday

TrèsSugar Q + A: Remembering an Ex's Birthday

Oh exes. You'd think you'd be rid of them once you're not officially together, but sometimes they creep back into your mind. When you look at the calendar on your former anniversary, for example, you might spend the rest of the day remembering your first date.

I came across a similar situation in our new community group: TrèsSugar Q + A. A reader asked:

Do you remember ex-boyfriend's birthdays, and if so, is it rude to not wish him well?

I weighed in with my two cents, saying that if you remember, it's totally cool to send a quick email or Facebook message. But, if you don't want to initiate contact, I think it's fine to let it pass and just send happy thoughts (or the opposite!). What would you all do?

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starbucks2 starbucks2 7 years
I always remember but with one ex, I wouldn't dare to even get in contact. It didn't end well and we're not at all on speaking terms. The other ex? Sure, why not. I sent him a text he writes back to thank me and the next time I'll hear from him is on my birthday. So basically we're in contact twice a year....
karjofas86 karjofas86 7 years
I remember one of my ex's bday becauses is the exact date as my father's bday. The first bday after we broke off, i send him a happy bday, but i regret it so much, because he thought i did it to get back together, what made things worse. i dont talk to him anymore. My other ex's it was years ago, on my highschool days, and we went to the same university together, and if i have the chance to see them online, i say something, but if i dont, its not a big deal.
hypnoticmix hypnoticmix 7 years
Is this a trick question, lol, if you're not talking to them why in the world would you entertain saying Hey Happy Birthday! just because you flipped the calendar and see a marked date. Now if you maintain a friendship post relationship that's a different story.
mix-tape mix-tape 7 years
Ha! This article is 16 days too late! I was trying to decide what to do for an ex's bday Should I send a text, write on his Facebook, or just ignore it? I got on Facebook and before I knew it he had messaged me basically to initate a conversation in order for me to wish him a good one! Kinda silly, but I guess he still values my opinion of him...
Beauty Beauty 7 years
It depends. One ex's birthday was this week and I sent him a card, called, and so forth. We're obviously on great terms, and I wouldn't dare forget to wish him a happy birthday! Another ex's birthday is coming up, and I gave him a small present when I saw him last weekend. But he didn't want to open it until his birthday, which makes me think he just doesn't care. (He doesn't.) So in that case, I wish I had just ignored the birthday, because it wound up making me feel stupid and unappreciated.
RoaringSilence RoaringSilence 7 years
If you're still friends, as in you hang out with the same people, and do activities together, or see each other frequently, it would be rude to not send birthday wishes. If you don't even write each other on the internet though, I'd find it insincere to send a birthday greeting.
Yesi-Jukebox Yesi-Jukebox 7 years
I actually do still send my ex a happy birthday text, but we dated years ago and have remained in contact.
skigurl skigurl 7 years
i always remember just because i'm like that and they were (at one time) a big deal in my life...but i abide by what Tres said...if we're cool and friendly, i'll either text or send an fb message, but if i don't want to initiate contact either for the respect of my current bf or for my own sanity or to not open a can of worms, i won't - and i would never call no matter what let's be honest, most guys aren't banging down our doors to say happy birthday, so whatever if you don't want to say anything, don't
KateAthens KateAthens 7 years
Well ofc i remember. But i dont call.. It will just make things worse.
dexaholic dexaholic 7 years
I think I would send him a quick 'happy birthday' text (it's how we communicate(d) most frequently). I do wonder though if I'll get a message from him on my birthday (my birthday is a few weeks before his). I guess we shall see.
tlsgirl tlsgirl 7 years
I still remember my ex's birthdays, but unless we're still friends I just let it pass.
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