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Is Sex Without Condoms Safe?

Group Therapy: No Condoms . . . Yay or Nay?

This question is from a Group Therapy post in our TrèsSugar Community. Add your advice in the comments!

I got my first depo provera shot on July 8th. I have another appointment to get my second shot. My boyfriend and I have been using condoms but we are curious as to how different it would feel without condoms. He and I were both virgins before we decided to have sex so I know it will be safe. I'm just scared about pregnancy. I know that depo provera isn't 100 percent but I heard that when you go off of it, it takes about a year or more to finally conceive. Do you think I should not use condoms or continue using them? Would spermicidal lube help if we decide to not use condoms? I'm super cautious about this kind of stuff and I definitely do not want a baby until I'm at least 27. Thanks everyone!

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mururoheline mururoheline 5 years
Sorry, forgot to add: "...and it's only starting to come back now AFTER 7 YEARS."
mururoheline mururoheline 5 years
Please please PLEASE don't ever take another shot of Depo Provera!! I've had 5, my period stopped after the 3rd one, and it's only starting to come back now, once every few months. However, I don't know if I'll ever be able to have children. My gynecologist cringed, when she heard what I was prescribed.. she said sex criminals get injected with this stuff, so that they won't be have any will nor ability to have sex. Girl, switch to pills.
karlotta karlotta 5 years
By the way, condoms are LESS effective than hormonal BC (taken correctly) - because they break. As Kayepants said, you should check with your doctor how long it takes for the shot to become effective, but then you really should be fine.
JoeTyndall JoeTyndall 5 years
No form of birth control is 100% effective. I remember a story from my college anatomy/physiology class. A fellow had a vascectomy, which is the cutting of the tube called the vas deferens. As is turned out, he had an anatomical anomaly, in which he had a second vas deferens. You guessed it, he became a father.
kurniakasih kurniakasih 5 years
It's still your choice. Well, when in doubt, always use backup bc, that's just my opinion. I mean, I got pregnant with my kid when I was on the pill and husband wasn't using yah. Um. There's no 100% bc (unless it's abstinence), so unless you're 'ok' that this man may be the father of your kid (unplanned or not), I'd get a backup bc *i.e. condoms.
juicebox07 juicebox07 5 years
I've heard the depo shot is even more effective than birth control pills. I'm on the pill and don't use a condom, and I've never gotten pregnant. My bf also pulls out. (Like Betty Wayne said, it's kind of gross when a guy ejaculates in you because it will run out up to a few days afterwards. It soaks your underwear and smells really fishy.) I say go ahead and stop using condoms if you want to. It feels so much better. I haven't used condoms in years. I hate them. The difference is like comparing dial up internet to DSL or cable internet.
Community-Manager Community-Manager 5 years
Hey everyone, please just be mindful that we don't allow any personal attacks directed at any of our members even if it is over a heated topic. Please refrain from any hurtful comebacks. Thanks!
kayepants kayepants 5 years
Bottom line, check with your doctor for when it's "safe" to go condom-free. Different types of birth control take different amounts of time to "build-up", so to speak. Generally, wait a month, but your doctor will know for sure. Also, congratulations on taking steps towards not bringing unwanted babies into an already overpopulated world, and shame on anyone criticizing her for her choices.
karlotta karlotta 5 years
Back to your question after this facepalming display of utter insanity - Depo-Provera is considered one of the most efficient methods of contraception out there (except for the IUD). I've personally been on NuvaRing (which has a slightly higher failure percentage) for 6 years and my boyfriend and I never used condoms (we got tested first, no horrified display of outrage, please) - and I have never gotten pregnant. Ditch the condoms and rest easy - sex without rubber (and without worry!) is soooo nice. Have fun!
jazzytummy jazzytummy 5 years
Amen to that.
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
I ignore him most of the time, jazzy, but telling the OP that her boyfriend is a scum bag because she has a question about safe sex is hurtful and unfair to her. The drivel... yes it's the same drivel as always. Every once in a while I try to decipher it, honestly it makes less and less sense the more you try to make sense out of it.
Pistil Pistil 5 years
Why don't you explain to us how one goes about building a relationship and a strong connection? That would be way more helpful. You always have the same responses, but they aren't very constructive and clearly we're all immature harlots in doomed relationships, including GregS.
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
Feels better for the ladies too, Greg!
GregS GregS 5 years
First of, pax, it sounds like there's already a relationship here. I agree that STDs would be the greater concern here. As for the feelings, I can't speak for you ladies, but it's different for the guys in a much better way (IMHO). Going bare then opens up the STD issue. Are you both checked out for STD's? If you have been and you trust that he's not playing around (and assuming you're not either) you should be OK on that front. Depo is a pretty effective BC method, so I wouldn't worry too much about that. I can understand Betty's reluctance to putting chemicals inside of you. There's something intrinsically wrong about that. I know they're effective and all, and yeah, it kills the little wigglers, but what else does it kill?
Bettye-Wayne Bettye-Wayne 5 years
The myth about the depo being good for a year is exactly that: a myth. There's also a myth about not being able to get knocked up again til your period comes. I would say you're fine. I had a bad depo experience so I cringe to even hear about it, but you should be fine. Personally, spermicides freak me out. The suffix -icide doesn't belong in my vagina. For the sake of hygiene. you may want to make him pull out. There are some frequent posts about how gross it is when a man comes inside you... I rarely let a man do it.
Mht1234 Mht1234 5 years
It's actually not very easy to get pregnant, so I would think it's pretty safe to have sex without the condoms if you both are committed to the relationship. I am usually more scared of an std. If you are so worried, why don't you talk to your doctor and let him explain the statistics, then you'll hear how rare one gets pregnant while on these kinds of contraceptions. Ofcourse there are people who do get pregnant anyway, but it's not something that happens too often. Also, as stated above, you should be able to deal with the issue if it comes up; either it's a keeper or an abortion, both is perfectly up to you. But I do understand how you feel, and Pax: I dont think she thinks of them as a bad thing, but if you dont want them, you dont want them. It's the biggest commitment of ones life, and it's perfectly understandable if someone doesn't want that commitment. I support abortion alot more than giving birth to unwanted children....
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