Anyone else out there ever grow up with the song "Twice My Age" by Shabba Ranks? Well, little did I know that my high school booty-poppin' anthem would one day become my actual life.
Yes, it's true. I slept with a man who was nearly twice my age.
I was 31 and newly separated. He was a man I had known casually for a few years, but one day he noticed that I wasn't myself. He gave me his number and asked me to reach out if I wanted to. Because he was a neutral party — not a friend, not a family member, no one who knew me and my then-husband as a couple — I decided to take a chance. We ended up talking for hours that night, which concluded with both of us admitting that there was an attraction to each other. So, we decided to meet for a drink. We behaved that night, but a few weeks after, I found myself in his bedroom, allowing him to undress me and take me any way he wanted to.
It became a regular thing for a while, until we both got emotionally attached and he made the decision to cut it off romantically. The age difference, while it made no difference to me, mattered to him in a way I may never understand. Admitting to peers of mine that I had been with a man of his vintage was met with questions, comments, and crazy looks. But here's why I think every women should find herself with a much older man at some point in her life.
Yes, it still works
This man had absolutely no problems getting ready to go. No assistance needed. Sometimes, it was even a certain look that would set him off and the next thing I know, it was on like Donkey Kong.
It lasts . . . and lasts
Being with men around your own age, you kind of grow up together and advance together sexually. Especially if you have the same amount of experience, as I did with previous partners. It was always OK with the men I was with in the past, but this was the first time I realized what going all night was about. OK, not all night, but five innings of baseball is good enough, right?
They are adventurous
The man I was with was great in the bedroom, but he was all about new spots. Sometimes it was the couch. Sometimes it was a chair. The dining room table happened on more than one occasion, as I believe the floor did as well. The ideas and positions he came up with were endless, and I've brought some of them with me into a new relationship, too.
They put you first
Seriously. He was more concerned about my pleasure than his and actually felt bad if he came before me. He felt especially bad if I didn't come at all. That had never happened to me before him. However, I've dated older men after him and it's been the same deal. I like it.
He taught me new things
This man was a different animal sexually, and because I did have very deep feelings for him, I allowed him to try a lot of things on me and with me that I wouldn't have wanted to try in the past. But I learned so much about what makes me more in-tune with my body and how to enjoy sex more. I've brought some of those things along on my journey, too.
No, his butt/balls do not sag
I'm unsure where this came from (probably my sister), but this was not the case. In fact, the man I was with looked 20 years younger than he is, and I believe he enjoyed getting IDed at restaurants and having the wait staff look at him in shock. Nothing was saggy. Everything looked awesome. And felt awesome.