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Are Some People Meant to Be Single?

Are Some Better Off Being Single?

Here's a post from OnSugar blog Rantings of a Single Girl.

Over the weekend, I ran into an old high school classmate who is apparently on the reunion committee. She asked me if I was coming to the reunion. I told her that I was still thinking about it because a lot can happen between now and September. Then she asked me if I did come, would I be bring my plus one? (Side note: I hate the term 'plus one' but that's another day, another post.) I told her that I was single and would not be bringing anyone with me to the reunion. So she said, "Well don't worry honey! You're still young. You've got plenty of time to find they right guy."

Why does the fact that I am not bringing anyone automatically mean that I'm not seeing someone? Maybe it's a new relationship and I want to spare him the pain of going to my high school reunion. Or maybe we've been in a relationship forever, but he's the executive of a major corporation and is jet setting 2 weeks out of the month. Yeah, right, but you get my point. Not bringing someone to the reunion SHOULDN'T automatically mean I'm single.

Anyway, back to the point of this, I told her that I was going to stay single forever . . . then she spazed out on me. Seriously. "You can't give up on love," she said, "because there is someone out there for you. You just have to find him!" I wanted to go crawl under a rock. This girl used to be the most pessimistic person I knew. To her, boys were just toys. "Use 'em and lose 'em" was her motto in high school (and some of college). Apparently ten years later, a happy marriage and 1.5 kids has turned her into Charlotte York.

Anyway, long story short, after our conversation, I was wondering if maybe I am supposed to be single. You hear that some people are just better off being single. That relationships just aren't their forte. Okay, I don't believe that for me. I've enjoyed being in the relationships that I've been in. It's just the long lasting part that is giving me trouble. But I am a relationship person, whatever that means. I do believe there is someone out there for me. Somewhere.

But do you believe that some people really are better off being single? That some people just aren't mean to be in a relationship but instead just enjoy the company of the opposite sex (or same sex) in casual flings or short-term relationships?

Want to see more? Start following Rantings of a Single Girl or start your own OnSugar blog. Maybe your stories will be posted here on TrèsSugar!

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Join The Conversation
hausfrau hausfrau 7 years
Ugh. This must have gotten linked.
totygoliguez totygoliguez 7 years
I really don't know; I'm still young. However, at this point in my life I think I'm better off being single. I just don't see myself sacrificing my career my goals and my wants for a relationship (lets be honest, relationships take sacrifices). I think I'm too into myself to be in a relationship right now. Maybe in the future I will like to be in a relationship. But I also don't see myself sleeping with the same person for the rest of my life. Only time will tell...
chillchic chillchic 7 years
My aunt is like this. She goes on plenty of dates, but she's never really into it, even if she's attracted to the guy. She has been in love before but she's just not into her relationships. She is miserable in them and a much nicer person when she is single. She says she never wants to get married and I believe her. I think if you are really into yourself (like she is), relationships are bad because people (especially men) are so demanding and not everyone has it in them to cater to someone else's feelings all the time. It doesn't make you a bad person at all. It just means you re better off single.
Yesi-Jukebox Yesi-Jukebox 7 years
Some are better off single but I wouldn't say forever.
xgreenfairyx xgreenfairyx 7 years
"Why does the fact that I am not bringing anyone automatically mean that I'm not seeing someone?" ...because people who volunteer for things like 'reunion committees', are stupid.
starangel82 starangel82 7 years
Being single doesn't mean you are a nun and aren't dating anyone at all.
Sundaydrive Sundaydrive 7 years
@MSucre thank you! I was wondering if I was the only one to notice that. It just made the rest of the post look like a silly rant after she complained that someone didn't think her saying she was single actually meant that she could be in a long term relationship with an international business man. WTF?!
inlove23 inlove23 7 years
I think I'm one of those people better off taken. Ever since 6th grade I have constantly had a boyfriend, and it just happens that way. I have had time to go and heal in between the boys though so I know how it feels to be single, but I'm better off taken. However, I have friends who are the complete opposite and almost never have boyfriend s. I guess life just happens that way.
Gawjuslayd Gawjuslayd 7 years
I absolutely HATE those girls, yes I call them girls, who have the "perfect" marriage, "perfect engagement", "perfect" wedding, "perfect" husband, "perfect" kids- "PERFECT" LIFE!!! Get real ladies!! In a "perfect" world, women would be stronger, smarter, more linguistic, more capable, and over all in charge. Oh wait! It is like that! I think being single is harder than in a relationship!!! You have to do everything on your own, with not support from a man- unless it's Dad. You get your own job, own food, pay your own bills, own rent, and make your own decisions. Everything you get up until your "Relationship" is your own! Who wouldn't want that type of accomplishment? Don't get me wrong a true independent woman should still be able to hold her own, but no one can argue the fact that it is easier when you are single.... Best advice: Go to the reunion. When they ask about your Plus 1 (in which case you would think about an over sized T-shirt) reply with confidence and poise, "My Plus 1 is Plus Many. I deserve the best and won't settle for anything less! Why take one guy to a reunion, I don't want to make the others jealous!" A woman with self-esteem is much hotter than a woman with the weight of a "perfect" life on her shoulders!
MSucre MSucre 7 years
The post reads, "Why does the fact that I am not bringing anyone automatically mean that I'm not seeing someone?" Ummmm maybe because you said you were single?!??!?!?!
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 7 years
In a word: Yes. People are different.
Girl-Jen Girl-Jen 7 years
Maybe I'm just saying this because I'm blissfully single after 4 years of unhappy marriage...but I love it. I really think some people are happier being single. I think I'm one of them. If I fall in love, I'll go with it, but I am happy being single. When I got married, I felt like thousands of doors had slammed in my face. Now that I'm divorced, hey, they're open again! I'm not just talking about interactions with the opposite sex, I'm talking about travel and retirement and nights in with the cats...and hey, even how to decorate my apartment. It's wonderful!
skigurl skigurl 7 years
Yes, some people probably are - if you don't have an urge to be coupled and are happy single for the rest of your life, then that's great for you. Some people I know lead perfectly lovely single lives, even though they are older. I know for me, I would hope to someday be married, but not everyone has that wish. Some people are so condescending (e.g. the classmate in the story above).
Bailey-Bloom Bailey-Bloom 7 years
In my opinion, I think there are some people who are better off single because they have a lot of issues and baggage. But that is of course temporary. I think the ones who have been in bad or not-so-great relationships are the ones who don't want to be in one or say that they are better off being single. I think that once someone has experienced what a good relationship is like, then that person would be more open to being in a relationship. I also think it's about timing (where the person is in their life) and just meeting the right person. There are people out there who say they don't want to meet anyone or be in a relationship and then they are!
nylorac nylorac 7 years
I don't understand why anyone would vote No in this poll... Being single is another lifestyle choice. I can understand why a lot of people would view it as undesirable but then again, they're probably the ones with the 1.5 kids and husband. Take pride in being single!
Jessiebanana Jessiebanana 7 years
I think I'm better of being single because I enjoy my space and alone time waaay too much. It's not the commitment aspect. I have no problem staying with one person and I'm not a grass is always greener on the other side, nor do I feel the need to play the field. It's simply that at the end of the day the idea of coming home to someone is more stressful than it is warming. Ideally I wouldn't mind being in a non conventional relationship with someone who felt the same way, but I'm not going to hold my breath on that one.
ShaynaLeah ShaynaLeah 7 years
There are definitely some major plusses to the single life (I have some listed here: - and there are some people who truly operate best and are happiest when they are alone and have full control over their lives -- I don't think there's a one size fits all answer to something this big.
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