We're happy to present this excerpt from one of our favorite sites, YourTango. Today, we learn five tips for a successful first date.
During the last couple weeks, you have communicated with someone you're interested in via emails and several telephone conversations. Then, it becomes obvious that there's "phone chemistry" and a mutual interest in meeting each other. You both agree to meet in person — now for the moment of truth! Here are five rules of dating which can help you feel more comfortable and ultimately be more successful:
- Visualize success. Think about your wonderful attributes and not your faults. Take an inventory of your values, skills, talents, interests, and "heart." Leave all your negative thoughts at home.
- Keep your expectations in check. Don't start imagining yourself at the altar with your date. I recommend you ask yourself these three questions first: Do I like the person? Does the conversation flow easily with one another? Is there any kind of attraction? And that's it. If you answer yes to these questions, then I recommend you be open to seeing the person again.
- Dress appropriately. Be presentable, neat, well-groomed, and in casual dress clothes. If you're a man, then don't come to a date in a t-shirt and jeans. For women, do not come dressed "to kill" by looking overly sexy like you are going to a nightclub. Strive to look like the guy or girl next door and someone who they would feel comfortable bringing home to their parents.
- Use your values as your guideposts. Know what's most important to you in your life and look to see if your date has similar feelings. Pay close attention to anything that makes you uncomfortable — your gut is usually right!
- Be courteous and kind to your date (even if you are not interested). This is truly the golden rule of dating. You never really know where you will see him or her again and who his or her friends are. Always treat people the way you wish to be treated.
By keeping these rules of dating in mind, you will have more pleasant dating experiences. This process can truly lead you to meaningful and successful relationships.
Written by Coach Amy Schoen for YourTango.
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