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"What Is His Deal?"

"What Is His Deal?"

This post comes from Group Therapy in our TrèsSugar Community. Feel free to add your advice in the comments!

My friend (let’s call her Laura) recently introduced me to a good male friend of hers (let’s call him Mark) at a Halloween party. Mark and I had a good time talking to each other and he emailed my friend a day later to tell her that he thought I was really nice. He then found me on Facebook and asked me out for the following weekend, to which I said yes.

We texted a few times and flirted a little bit. However, when the weekend came he got sick (I was sick too so I didn’t mind that we weren’t going to meet, although I didn’t tell him that). But now it’s been a week and I haven’t heard anything from him, no texts, no nothing. I think this is a little strange since he was the one who initially pursued me. Plus he’s friends with my friend so I didn’t think he would just ditch our plans. There is such a thing as politeness and I’m a little surprised that he hasn’t called me to let me know that he’s still sick, or busy, or whatever. So, I don’t know what to do if and when he calls. Should I go out with him? He’s already demonstrated that he can’t keep me in the loop.

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lawdawg08 lawdawg08 7 years
Give him a call!!
kurniakasih kurniakasih 7 years
Um yeah. I've had that happened, but I was the sick party. But since I wasn't that into him to begin with maybe that's why I didn't bother keeping contact although he'd send me a joke or two just to 'keep in touch'. He was pretty cool and gave me some space (a few days without contacting me until I felt better), unfortunately any type of attraction I felt for him disappear. So I ended up having to tell him 'no' for the date. But just to ease your mind, just call the guy or e-mail him. Just keep in touch, his response (or lack of it) will tell you what he wants. Good luck.
Vsugar Vsugar 7 years
Well, I wonder if we are getting all the details - did you already try contacting him? I think that if you were to, for instance, send him a text or e-mail saying - "Hey - How are you feeling? Hope you're doing better. Talk to you soon" (or whatever), and he never responds, then, ok, he's just not that into you. He might genuinely be really sick (I had swine flu this summer, and I was sick for like, a month, and let me tell you, a bunch of stuff fell through the cracks). I wouldn't just sit on your hands and wait for him to call you if you haven't already made the effort to reach out to him. I would only do it ONCE, but I wouldn't just wait on him.
Allytta Allytta 7 years
My boo pursued me for over a week of texting but I was busy at the time... So he stopped. He resurfaced 3 weeks later texting me again apologising - he was very busy. Now we're together quite some time and are very much in love. Things happen :)
dfserine dfserine 7 years
You are reading waaay too much into it. Instead of trying to guess his intentions, why don't you just ask him out again? Worst scenario he says no thanks... which would be his loss and you can move on elsewhere. But honestly a guy worth dating will LIKE that you took initiative and say yes... if he says no... you did yourself a favor by asking because now you know he's a douche if he says no.
runningesq runningesq 7 years
Just. Not. That. Into. You. Move on !
GlowingMoon GlowingMoon 7 years
I agree -- forget about him. If he doesn't seem to care enough to re-schedule with you, why should you care?? It takes two to date, and he seems disinterested.
kismekate kismekate 7 years
Yah, I'll agree with Anonymous. He's just not that into you. My friend is in the same situation and I keep telling her the same thing, but I honestly don't get it. How can you not see that he's not interested? And why would you want a guy that blows you off like this anyways? There are tons of guys who would go out of their way to keep in contact with you every day if they really cared. Forget about this loser.
KadBunny KadBunny 7 years
What a scumbag. :(
chloe-bella chloe-bella 7 years
This is too much of a coincidence, because my best friend just told me a story EXACTLY like this - she introduced one of her girlfriends to her guy friend - they were supposed to hang the following weekend, but then they were both sick, and he never called . . . What actually happened in my friend's situation was that the guy had met another girl in the meantime and had no interest in re-scheduling the date. If I were you, I would forget about him and move on.
genesisrocks genesisrocks 7 years
I'd say call him, even if he did initiate the plans. That way you won't have to wonder
gigilgirl gigilgirl 7 years
Hmm... familiar story here :))
KadBunny KadBunny 7 years
KadBunny KadBunny 7 years
I think the problem here is he initiated the plans so she's waiting for his cue.. at least that's how I would go about it. I'm lame and a bit traditional though. So, yeah, I'd give it one last shot. Give him a call for the sake of trying, be super casual about it, and if nothing then screw him. Move on. :) I try to remain calm about this like this cause for all you know he could be (heaven forbid!) in a hospital or something and totally unable to reach you. I mean who knows right? You won't know til you call!
NaturallyGlam NaturallyGlam 7 years
Or... you could just call him and ask how he is doing. If he's sick, shouldn't you be the one to call him instead of you waiting for him to call you?
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