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Where Do You Stand? Traveling Together

We all know that living with someone brings a completely new level of understanding to the relationship. You learn how the other person lived when you weren't around, and it becomes as clear as day whether or not you're a compatible couple. There are other circumstances that conquer the same goal though, and one that I find very telling is vacationing together, from conception to completion. Being able to communicate and plan, cope with small spaces, handle jet lag, and deal with any blunders along the way can be incredibly significant in a relationship — I'm sure you've all heard a horror story or two about a couple going on a dream vacay, only to return broken up! Perhaps I put too much emphasis on travel compatibility, so tell me where you stand on this matter. Is it as telling for you as it is for me?


0danielle0 0danielle0 9 years
My boyfriend and I are off to Thailand for 2 weeks on Oct 16. We've been together for 3 years and have traveled quite a bit together, but I'm still nervous! Two weeks is a long time! And it's Asia- talk about foreign. We both get frustrated easily, so I'm guessing it's going to take conscious effort and some Xanax to get through this one! Wish us luck!
Poster-of-a-Girl Poster-of-a-Girl 9 years
I went to Mexico with my ex, and he was drinking before I was even awake. And then I'd get mad and sulk all day. And he would say something like "I'm allowed, I'm on vacation!" and I'd retort "Yeah, but the problem is that you do the same thing at home!" And then I left him 3 months later.
heineken67 heineken67 9 years
We have very different travel styles. We both like to plan ahead, but he stresses out way more than I do if the plans go even slightly awry.
SassAndBide SassAndBide 9 years
why not? if you trust each other, might as well have fun together
sparklestar sparklestar 9 years
We have a mini-break planned for the middle of October but we went to France and stayed in his parents house out there in July and it was fine. :)
havok636 havok636 9 years
we're going on our first trip next weekend. and to make it even worse, it's to my hometown! he's never been and we're staying with my parents. it's going to be interesting
kia kia 9 years
Before my hubby and I were married he met me in Central America after I finished up some work there for a vacay. I was so proud of what we accomplished on our trip together... impulsiveness, exhaustion, and eventually some BAD food poisoning. We still laugh that we went through that in a small room that had saloon doors on the bathroom. You know it is love after something like that.
ilanac13 ilanac13 9 years
i think that you do learn a lot about someone when you travel together, and it's even more interesting at times than what you find when you live together. i've found that my fiance is really bad at organizing things, and that if i don't research things, then it's a big mess. i have a vacation routine where i like to get up early and maximize my time while i'm away from home, and he's not that way at it's harder for us to adjust sometimes when we're on a trip.
Mesayme Mesayme 9 years
I just thought of Oprah and Gayle's road trip... that was a riot!! I could never be stuck with ANY woman in a car longer than a day. No way. These quick chats are all I can stand. *sigh* This made me realize that I've never enjoyed a vacation longer than a weekend with any man. Nope. Never. Your responses are very therapeutic. :) LOL
kristyy kristyy 9 years
How about traveling with friends? I enjoy spending a day with my best friend, but can't imagine traveling with her. I think she'll get on my nerves by Day 3 because we have different styles (i.e., I like to get up early and pack in as much as I can, she likes to sleep in and just lounge around). Some people are good travel partners, even if you're not close friends. Others are good friends, but won't be good travel partners simply because their ideas on traveling/vacations may be different from yours. So if you've ever thought of traveling with a buddy, do a short trip (like a weekend thing) first to "test" it out. If you go too long together, you might end up not being that close anymore once you get back.
Deidre Deidre 9 years
Absolutely, positively, traveling together is a great way to see a whole new side to your relationship. This is a much less expensive and time-consuming way to understand more about the inner workings of your SO than by moving in with him/her. I would recommend at least 2 weeks traveling together to anyone looking to take their relationship to the next level (moving in together, getting engaged, etc). You really see a lot about how your SO can handle stress, boredom, and a whole lot of time with just you! It was after a trip to Europe that my then-boyfriend (now-fiance) and I realized that we really wanted to marry each other; and that we work really well as a team.
princess_eab princess_eab 9 years
LOL! sorry! hey, in my defense, it could be horrible! ha ha.
Mesayme Mesayme 9 years
Did ya have to go there? Did you have to brag that it's Scotland... really? I'd call you something...but I don't know you well enough :) LOL I'd marry Craig Ferguson just to visit his 'motherland' :ROTFL: Fine!!! You and Shrek have a lovely time in far far away... :WAVE:
princess_eab princess_eab 9 years
Mesayme - ha ha, thanks! it's in Scotland and I'm hoping everything goes well... planning on scheduling some "alone time" in just so we aren't so 24/7... we'll see.
chicobo chicobo 9 years
I agree that traveling is a good way to tell if your relationship is a go or not. I had a week long trip with my boyfriend and it was at times trying but we worked through it. He also pushed me to try things I've never done; like snorkeling with turtles!
TidalWave23 TidalWave23 9 years
I love traveling with my boyfriend and I swear by it for the health of the relationship. It can either bring you closer or drive you apart. My boyfriend and I travel at least 5 times a year to new and exciting places and each time it has brought us closer. Not that I haven't traveled with an ex and wanted to kill him by day 3 :rotfl:...
Shopaholichunny Shopaholichunny 9 years
We travel all the time together. :)
Mesayme Mesayme 9 years
princess... I envy you ;)
melliemelplease melliemelplease 9 years
Vacationing together is COMPLETELY telling!!! After my March European road trip, I realized how completely irrational, unloving, introverted... and well, boring my ex was. I could not wait to get home and end it! That being said, I gave him a second chance when he came crying, only for him to dump me two months later LOL.
Mesayme Mesayme 9 years
Baby steps... I'd go somewhere local where I feel comfortable. Somewhere we both know so that if we got tired of each other's company, as all humans will, in love or not... we could spent a few hours doing something separate so we're happy to meet back up. Say he could visit a shop related to his hobby and I to mine; have separate lunches and that makes meeting up for dinner that much better. On a road trip... I'd suggest mp3 player for the passenger so the driver controls the radio. And alternate restaurant stops!!! And pack snack bags with love notes inside... oops! I just showed my sappy :OOPS:
HelloAnia HelloAnia 9 years
Before my boyfriend and I went on a 10 day vacation to Europe together at the end of August, the two weeks leading up to the vacation I was freaking out. While I was out looking at maps, buying phrase books, and travel books he was back at our house playing Guitar Hero... I thought he felt that if I learned how to get around, then he can just follow. When we got there it was a completely different story. He took initiative and made it a great vacation. We only got into a squabble once... and with 10 days of non-stop contact I'd say that it's pretty good.
northofhere northofhere 9 years
My dad always told me that if you think you want to marry a person, travel with them. Traveling (especially internationally) is full of surprises and disappointments, and can easily bring out the worst in people. You can see how the other reacts to unexpected situations, how they problem-solve, etc. I think it's greatly beneficial.
princess_eab princess_eab 9 years
It's hard, *really* hard, to spend every waking moment with someone even on a 2-week trip. I haven't properly traveled with any boyfriends yet outside of seeing family at holidays or taking a weekend trip. However, I do have a very exciting trip planned to see my new fellow, and I'm hoping we can schedule a little alone time, since we'll be in a cottage together for a whole week... with no activities planned other than hiking, some sightseeing, and cooking...
bengalspice bengalspice 9 years
My ex and I were more compatible on vacations away from everyone than we were when we got back and went to our separate apts.
lilCROAT03 lilCROAT03 9 years
just before traveling i make a 'no fight rule'. and as soon as you feel an argument coming on just smack yourself on the head and shake it off. for the sake of your vacation time.
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