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You Asked: How Can I Make His Hobby Less Painful for Me?

Dear Sugar--

My husband's favorite past time is to listen to live bands and he very much wants my company. I prefer early quite nights while the bands typically start at 10:30PM. How can I make the crowds, noise, and boisterous scene in general more bearable so I can actually spend time with my husband? -- Up for Suggestions Samantha

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Up for Suggestions Samantha --

First of all, I must commend you for asking for suggestions on how to make his hobby more manageable for you rather than finding ways to get out of it. Your husband is very lucky to have such an understanding wife!

To make the late nights less daunting, make a compromise with your hubby -- as we all know, relationships are all about give and take. Grin and bare it every once in a while, but in return, let him know that you want him to spend some nights at home, relaxing with you, doing what you want to do. Perhaps you can do a little research and see if there is a different venue with similar music that has a more desirable show time. A cocktail or two will surely take the edge off and could make the noise a little more manageable -- and who knows, you might even actually enjoy yourself!

Knowing that the loud nights aren't an everyday occurrence will make them much less painful for you, not to mention having something to look forward to when it's your night to make the plans. I hope these tips help!


Join The Conversation
delia delia 9 years
My husband and I go to live shows 2 or 3 times a week, and recommend getting some silicone earplugs. They're small, mold-able, and discreet, so you won't feel like a total dork. In addition, earplugs are really important to protect your hearing in the long run! I've also found - on the nights I don't feel like going out - it really helps to take a cat nap before heading out to late shows. Good luck!
paulinhadrp paulinhadrp 9 years
I agree with nicachica. Planning a dinner before the show might be the perfect opportunity for you guys to spend some quality time together, and for you to sip on some bubbly champagne to help with the noisy late night.
facin8me facin8me 9 years
I absolutely agree with Nicachica...earplugs are the way to go at concerts. My husband and I worked concerts during college and we always wore earplugs to save our hearing and to take the edge off of the sound.
bigestivediscuit bigestivediscuit 9 years
Yeah, I definitely think striking a good balance is needed. I get so annoyed with my bf when he plays Pro Evo football with his flatmates instead of spending time with me! However, I've learned to compromise by letting him play (i.e. beat) me a few times with the promise of us going to see a movie later, etc. :) I still hate that stupid game!
bg2007 bg2007 9 years
I was going to say the same thing. I hate live music only because it's always so loud (and in such a cramped place!). Earplugs allow me to enjoy myself, still hear the people around me, and actually appreciate the music. Plus, considering that your ears won't be ringing for days afterwards, your ears will thank you!
nicachica nicachica 9 years
earplugs! i go to a ton of live shows and although it looks a tad dorky, it will save your ears in the long run. i see a fair amount of people wearing them so don't be shy about doing that! also, a lot of venues offer food or have a restaurant nearby so why not go to one of those places before the show so you can get a chance to talk to your hubby in relative quiet? then you can head off to the show! :)
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