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You Asked: I Want to Wait Until Marriage

Dear Sugar,

I have been dating this wonderful guy for about three months now. We always have a great time together and the chemistry is undeniable. He has initiated sex before, but I told him I wasn't ready yet. My problem is that I lied — I'm a virgin and I don't plan on having sex until my wedding night. From past experience, I've learned that telling guys right off the bat scares them off, which is why I haven't come clean yet. I want to be honest but I don't know how to tell him the truth without freaking him out. I know that sex is important in a relationship, especially for someone that's had it before, so what should I do? — Waiting Until Marriage Melissa

To see DearSugar's answer

Dear Waiting Until Marriage Melissa,

If the guy you're dating is as wonderful as you describe, he'll be understanding with your news, but you're right, sex is an important part of a relationship so if he's not willing to wait for you, he's simply just not the guy for you.

Keeping secrets from your significant other is never a good idea so I'd come clean ASAP. Since I don't know anything about this guy, I don't know what his reaction will be so the only advice I can give you is to be honest. Yes, he might freak out, and yes, things might not work between you two, but if waiting until marriage means that much to you, it'll be worth waiting for the right guy too. Good luck.


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