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You Asked: My Friend is Obsessed With Her Chest!

Dear Sugar--

My friend is absolutely obsessed with her chest size. She's no more than an A cup, but I think she is beautiful the way she is. I tell her this all the time, and I point out all the awesome outfits she can wear braless, plus she has a boyfriend who loves her and her small chest, but her insecurities about it are making her jealous and suspicious when it comes to his faithfulness. Granted his ex girlfriends have been a different body type than her, but they are still EX girlfriends, so it's obvious that they weren't cutting it.

She really wants to get plastic surgery, but I'm afraid she's putting too much faith that breast augmentation will change her self esteem. Surgery is only a temporary fix for a major self esteem issue. I can't even help her because I'm a 32 E, and anything I say doesn't register. I just don't want her to make a decision that could possibly be very dangerous. How can I help her see how beautiful she is?

--Concerned Carrie

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Concerned Carrie --

It's great that you are being so supportive in trying to help your friend see how beautiful she is on her own. Plastic surgery is a huge deal and there can be many complications during and after the surgery, which I'm sure is why you don't want her to go through with this. Plus, you're right, getting this kind of surgery is not a sure fix for all your insecurities.

If telling her how perfect she is on her own isn't working, maybe you can fill her in on what it's like having big breasts. You can remind her how hard it is to find shirts and dresses that fit when you're bigger breasted, and how much your boobs hurt when you exercise or get your period. In addition, breast implants feel and look different than regular breasts and if you have an augmentation, you can run the risk of not being able to nurse your baby if you want to, or you can lose all sensitivity.

If she does decide to get the surgery, she'll meet with a plastic surgeon that will go through all the medical risks. When she finds out how much it will hurt, how much it will cost, and how long it takes to heal, she may have second thoughts. If she still wants to go through with it, and being small-chested upsets her that much, having this surgery might really make her feel better about herself and if that's the case, it's her body and her decision. All you can do is continue to be the supportive friend she needs.


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