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You Asked: WIll She Ever Accept Me?

Dear Sugar,

I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years and we love each other very much. I recently moved overseas to be with him and things have been going great, with the exception of his sister — she has never accepted me and always treats me like I'm not wanted. In the almost two years that he and I have been together, she has never once called me to make plans or even just to say hi, and she has made her feelings about me very clear to him and his parents. It's been really hard for me to make new friends since I've moved and I always hoped his sister would reach out to me, but she's just made matters worse.

I know he wants us to have some sort of relationship, but I feel like she'll just never accept me. How can I handle this and keep it from affecting my relationship with my boyfriend? — Lonely Laura

To see DearSugar's answer


Dear Lonely Laura,

I'm so sorry to hear that your boyfriend's sister isn't welcoming you into her life, but it sounds to me like she's just jealous of the role you play in her brother's life — she now has to compete with you for his attention. You say that she's never made an effort to spend time with you, but have you reached out to her?

She sounds very stubborn so I recommend you talk to your boyfriend and ask him what the best way to approach this situation is. You don't want to come on too strong, but you also don't want to be a pushover, so find a middle ground and go from there. If she's still unwilling to let you in, you're unfortunately going to have to wait for her to come around. I know this has to be hard on you so lean on your boyfriend for support, but try to keep the issues with his sister separate. Good luck to you.


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