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You Asked: What's in a Name Anyway, Right?

You Asked: What's in a Name Anyway, Right?

Dear Sugar--

I met a great guy. We have been dating for a few weeks now, but there is one problem that may seem petty and ridiculous to some, but it's pretty major to me -- I can't stand his name! I can't bare to say it let alone introduce him to my friends and family. It's a short name so there is no way for me to really call him by a nickname that would make sense to others. Is there anything I can do? I really like this guy and want our relationship to work, but his name just pains me, it's almost like his parents were on drugs when they named him! Help!! -- Flustered Fiona

To see DEARSUGAR's answer

Dear Flustered Fiona --

I hate to break it to you Fiona, but if your man's name is the only thing you have to complain about, I think you're in pretty good shape here. Does he like his name or does he know how much you can't stand it? Do you have any pet names for him that are acceptable to use out in public? Obviously you can't introduce him to your family, friends, or co-workers by honey, baby or cupcake, but after you suck it up and get the name off your tongue once, you can reinstate the nickname ASAP!

No one is perfect, so if he treats you well, loves you and if you have fun with him, get over it honey -- he can't have it all! Who knows, with time, you might learn to love how bad his name is, or at least get a good chuckle out of it. Good luck!


Join The Conversation
cubadog cubadog 10 years
If he doesn't go by a nickname than you shouldn't call him by a nickname. As long as he is comfortable with his name than you shouldn't worry about it! People always tried to call me Shelly instead of Michele and in grade school when anybody including teachers would try to change it I would say that is not my name, my name is Michele. I even had teachers go so far as to say there is another Michele in the class can I call you Shelly my answer NO.
NadiaPotter NadiaPotter 10 years
(this is me...being tired) I used to have that problem with peoples names... then ... I get a life... and I get real problems.
ricarocks ricarocks 10 years
just give him a nickname! or call him hun or something. unless his name is janice, i think this is a quick fix.
tralalala tralalala 10 years
haha did anyone see the episode of Seinfeld where Elaine was dating a guy with the same name as a serial killer? Then when he decided to change it, she suggested OJ? hahaha it came out before the OJ mess....but it's still funny. Then they roke up because she wanted him to change it to that I'm done geeking out.... If Moon Unit & Dweezil Zappa can find love, I think you can get over it.
reese05 reese05 10 years
I think you're not really in loved with him because if you are then you can see beyond his name
anorthan anorthan 10 years
o i just read again and realized it said "flustered fiona" thought it was your name- my bad! :) still think it's silly to not like someone because of their name- and like everyone else I'm dying to know what it is- cause no matter how hard I try I can't think of anything so bad that I wouldn't date the person
anorthan anorthan 10 years
what is his name???? I don't want to sound rude but fiona isn't exactly a "normal" name either. Would you want someone to dump you because of it???
ninjastarlett ninjastarlett 10 years
You just introduce him however he would introduce himself. If he's comfortable with it, you should be too. You sound so petty in this post.
gossipqueen gossipqueen 10 years
WHAT'S THE NAME!!!! lol..if it really was Dick...please GET OVER IT! You're making it worse by hesitating every time you say it.
xnessicax xnessicax 10 years
I am interested to know as well!! I think if your that embarressed about it maybe he can go by his initials. Does he know you feel this way? Does he like his name?
juliemyjewel juliemyjewel 10 years
A name can be annoying, but you'll get over it with time. I once dated a guy named Louie-his given name, not shortened. I hated his name but I dated him anyway. He turned out to be a compulsive liar and I had to get a restraining order against him...Apparently I should have gone with my gut and not dated a guy with a name I can't stand! HAHA! =O
calibabi calibabi 10 years
oh man i'm SO interested to know what his name is!!! all sorts of things are popping into mind...
KandiQTC KandiQTC 10 years
I never really thought about a name being that annoying..f(o_O) candyapple, you crack me up!! ^_~* I have a joke with bf that I'm mostly German and he is Jewish, lol..My only fear is that if/when we get married that I'll pull a (Princess) Diana and mess of his full name: David Sascha Yehuda Eliezer Lichtenstein. WAH! mouth full, ;) and SO full of Jewishness (which I <3).
BeachBarbie BeachBarbie 10 years
This is the best thread! :rotfl:
demonkitty18 demonkitty18 10 years
are you serious??! his name is yr problem?? :S
candy-apple candy-apple 10 years
hehe thanks pop- for the record it's not Adolf! i don't think anyone would name their child that anymore, esp not in germany! hehe. but yeah, his name is more of a "caricature nazi" name.. and when it's coupled with middle and last name its much much worse. i remember when he told me his middle name my reaction was :"lmao! how much more german could u get?!" just to give everyone an idea, it's as caricature-like as Siobhan Deirdre O'Shaunessy would be to an Irish girl or David Isaac Cohen to a Jew! :P
popgoestheworld popgoestheworld 10 years
This is hilarious. Candy Apple as an interesting point. I mean, what if his name is Adolf? Or Osama? If it's just Dick, well, what are you going to do? Does he have a middle name? Is it Rod? Ha ha, I kill me. bluejeanie, you made me lol. I don't have any advice, I just thought this was post was insanely ridiculous and I'm loving the comments.
pinupsweetheart pinupsweetheart 10 years
I don't think it is something you should even worry about. If you like the guy and you guys get along who cares what his parents named him? Maybe that is what makes him different and unique. I have a rare first name and I can't tell you how many times people screw it up. At least 5-6 times a day. I am not kidding you. At first I didn't like my name growing up, but now I have come to learn to love it. And I think the more you fall in love with this guy, you will start to love it too.
vmruby vmruby 10 years
If that's your only problem where he's concerned then i'd say you're a pretty lucky girl.If he's such a great guy and you really care about him then whatever his name is or isn't should not affect you're life in the slightest.It's pointless and ridiculous......
Greggie Greggie 10 years
I'm assuming it's his first name, and the only one that comes to mind that's short and fits would be "D*ck." Regardless, if he likes his name and has no desire to use a nickname, that's his choice. I think it's incredibly childish to be embarrased by him based on the fact that you don't like his name.
cubadog cubadog 10 years
I am with everyone else on this. Get over it and grow the hell up forget the glass you need at least a gallon of it! Your incredibly selfish and self absorbed! It is not like the situation that Candy Apple is in where his name brings up a horrible event in the past.
auddie auddie 10 years
What name could possibly be so bad you cannot say it? If he's not bothered by it, you need to grow up and get over it. Maybe find out how he's parents came up with his name, it could be an interesting story or a family.
cravinsugar cravinsugar 10 years
This is going to sound mean, but I think you need a wake up call. You sound completely self-absorbed. and selfish. why did you even start dating him if you can't stand his name? And, if you tell him, you will only hurt his feelings as i am sure he heard enough jokes, and teasing in school if it is as bad as you say. I agree with a previous comment that said drink a tall glass of grow up, and if you can't, move on and let him find someone who can apprecite him for what he has to offer.
candy-apple candy-apple 10 years
well i for one understand you! my problem is perhaps a bit different but i think almost just as bad. first of all: i love my boyfriend. he is german and has an old traditional german name that doesn't translate into anything and no one outside germany has been able to pronounce it correctly (how his family would say it) to my knowledge. but that's not the main problem. the problem is this: he already looks like a World War II aryan poster child. on top of that he has a name and a middle name (and a last name!) that are either very very german or directly related to something WW2. which makes ppl look at him (or us) weird sometimes. i even got a few ppl ask me "is he a nazi?" (i'm jewish so my answer is pretty much "get a clue.") but yeah this is just for all those ppl saying names don't matter. a name is often charged with meaning and when that meaning is profoundly negative it can affect both him and you and not in a good way. i've also had issues saying his name even in private because honestly, growing up a jew i'd never thought i'd have to deal with a name like that. :P the solution we've found is that i call him the german equivalent of "darling" which is "schatzi", it's a sweet word and doesn't sound as cheesy as most pet names, probably cos its a different language. you could find a pet name of your own.. as for introducing him to ppl- i've had that discussion with bf and since we've established nothing will ever make me pronounce it correctly, he introduces himself now. it actually works out better because ppl are less nasty/judgemental to his face and actually ask where his name comes from instead of assuming things. hope this helped! good luck. ;)
fab4 fab4 10 years
I completely agree with bluejeanie and rubiala. This shouldn't be something to even have to think about. I would like to know what his name is, though...
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